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Things not to say during or just after sex.


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(right in the middle, answers phone)

"Oh hi (insert your father's name here)!

No, I'm not busy... mmm... nothing, actually. What are you wearing?

oh... sexy! You got that cock out? Stroking it for me? ...mm, baby. You know what I like." 

(covers mouthpiece and says to you) 

"Just keep going, this will only take a minute." (then back into the phone) "You know I never get dick as good as yours..."

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