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  • Community Administrator

I rather like the plot.

It's got a good motivation for the Empire's kidnapping of Cadus, because of their wide reaching plan. It also makes me feel sympathetic towards Cadus because how he is, was not exactly something he asked for and now that is being used to essentially enslave him. 

And I like that Arnor has a definite motivation to save him. Although that's two-fold. One; to stop the Empire but I imagine the main one is to save his adopted brother. Am I correct there?

It's a simple story arch, but an effective one. I think it will definitely make for a good story.

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Yes. For Cadus it' a war of resentment and anger to his actual family and for Arnor it's a rescue mission. I mean it'll take him a long time to get there and Cadus has a lot of siblings to kill. If you saw the map it's a walk for Arnor across land from the little gold circle to the big red capital star in the industrial area.

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Well Arnor doesn't like the open sea very much, so it'l be rough on him to pass those channels between the countries. And it's a fairly cold region, the big desert has an icy tinge to it closer south, and then all the mountains and forests and such will be difficult. Not to mention he gets to fight some of Cadus's siblings who are in advanced parties that are infiltrating countries.

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It's gonna take Arnor approimately 4-6 years to reach the Empire on foot. I mean that's through terrain and war, cause he will need to fight his way into the country and smuggle his way through the cities and what not. In the meantime, Cadus will damage the infrastructure of the Empire from the inside out.

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  • Community Administrator

Then again, even if there is a faster mode of transportation, I think you've made it clear that Armor is not exactly swimming in money. If he can't afford such transport, then he will indeed have to make the trek on foot.

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I suppose it could depend on how lucky he is. Then again, he could get lucky.. and then unlucky. Like he could earn enough money through a quest to afford faster transport. Then loses the money, or the transport gets lost/stolen/killed. Give the reader a little bit of hope and then snatch it away again >D

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I was,thinking that he first try to actually gain transportation. But he would be turned down cause he's obviously a lowly peasant and the kingdoms he goes to don't want to get involved in a war with the Empire. 

And with every imperial agent that Arnor would fight along the way that would be apart of quests that either help the kingdoms or refugees pushed from their homes or towns under control. 

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