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@Aurafox1 -- Carla
@Shuya "Cheshire" Hideaki -- Haru
@PinkKitten -- Miki
First time on this site, but not new to RP, or ERP. I'm excited to be joining you all!
A little bit about me; I am a trans man. That means I was labeled female at birth, but am now transitioning to male. But! I am a bottom and sub by nature, and luckily have no problem with the genitalia I got, so I most enjoy playing characters that allow me to have a vagina, cunt, pussy, whatever you want to call it. I will play female characters, BUT, if you really want to make my day, I would love to play as a trans man, or a cunt boy if you prefer. I also understand if the fact I do identify as a man makes you wish not to RP with me.
In regards to that as well, I have no preference on the gender of the roleplayer, but am generally seeking to play against male characters.
I am also very kinky! Please see my preferences for more detail, especially about what I won't play, but there are many, many other things I enjoy that did not make it on that list.
Also in regards to my preferences, the posting length is more of a suggestion. I tend to match what I am given, so I can go shorter and longer.
A new slave is brought in, and trained to please the prince. This can be more fleshed out as we wish it to be, or kept real simple. Seeking 1 Male Character, with possible additions
On the Hunt
The full moon is a bad time to be out alone in the woods, especially with shifters about. Who knows what packs would find you? Seeking at least 3 Male Characters
Scion of Fertility
Once a year, one person capable of bearing children is chosen by the fertility spirits, and on the night of their festival, receives the blessings of all the seed-bearing members of town. Seeking Multiple Characters, either Male or Futanari
I don’t know where to go with all of this. I don’t know who would even care, but I need to get this out there before I tear myself apart, probably literally.
I always hear about how common depression and anxiety are. ‘Everyone goes through some depression at some point’ ‘it’s a natural part of life’ ‘anxiety is just your body’s natural reaction from back in our prehistoric days’. If all of that is true, I think my existence is a genetic defect. A failed experiment in evolution. I don’t deserve to exist.
I’ve talked about having anxiety on here before, but it goes beyond some social awkwardness and nervousness about other people not liking what I put up. I fight constantly to convince my brain I’m not going to die, that some unlikely tragedy completely out of my control isn’t going to kill me or someone I depend on, or something else just as devastating, or that one of my small thoughtless actions isn’t going to cause a chain reaction that leads to some horrific accident. I don’t leave the house, I don’t work, I can’t keep any friendships except for the person who’s spent five years promising to spend the rest of his life with me and his best friend, who I barely feel able to talk to. And the depression stops me from distracting myself. I love writing, I love drawing, I love reading and watching anime and films and TV series and playing video games. But my mind and body will tell me that I hate it all because I’m not good enough at writing or drawing to make anything of myself and the rest are just pointless distractions that waste my life away. When I’m with my fiancé, it gets a little easier. He can motivate me to do the little things I enjoy like watching or playing something, but I can’t function without him most of the time. I do have rare moods where I feel empowered, like I’m capable of achieving anything I want and fuck my broken mind and the people who think I’m unlovable, I am the queen of my own destiny. But those moods don’t last long enough, and whatever I might create during that time becomes worthless to me after that high fades and it becomes more proof that I’m not actually capable. I am myself worthless and stupid and arrogant for ever thinking otherwise.
I’m trapped in my own mind and the air’s running out. I don’t know what to do. I know I need help, but I feel like what’s wrong with me is beyond any help anyone can give. But I need to keep trying.
The following story contains foul language, depictions of mental disorders, depictions of suicide, and rape. If you find any of these subjects disturbing, TURN AWAY NOW!!!!
What follows is a bit of a summary of several roleplays I've done privately with the wonderful @SMFoxy. The story is told by a Jirachi who mistakenly and tragically wasn't careful when granting wishes, and who now has a wish of her own. To make things right with her victims.
This is the second time tonight. The second time I've woken up, screaming bloody murder and drenched in sweat. I can't sleep anymore. Not without the nightmares. They won't stop; every fucking night, they come back to haunt me, like ghosts! What did I do to deserve this? Sure, I haven't been perfect, but nobody has! Dammit, I was just doing my job! Arceus put me here to grant wishes, and that's what I did. Can I really be blamed for the times they went wrong? How could I have known their intentions? I'm a Legendary, sure, but there are still things I don't know. I assumed they could relate. I assumed everybody could! I... I just didn't realise the effect I could have on them. 7 acquaintences became victims. Victims of an old saying. "Be careful what you wish for." In one fell swoop, I ruined the lives of a trainer and 6 Pokémon. If I could take it all back, I would. I can. They just need to ask. But they won't. I've caused them too much pain for them to wanna seek my help. But I'd love a chance to apologise. Anything to stop these damned nightmares! They're in them. Always dying. Always dying! Fuck me; I'll never unsee those nightmares, if I live to be 100 years old!
The storm that started everything. Was it supernatural? That, I can't answer. The weather is outside of my jurisdiction. But it came from nowhere, and battered Goldenrod City mercilessly. I saw 6 Pokémon huddled around their trainer, in a closet. They begged for safety. But not for themselves. They wanted their trainer to survive. They all survived; so did the house, by some miracle. But I watched them intently that night. They surrounded the boy with affection. He treated them well. Even after everything I've done to them, I'll stand by this until the day I die; he was never abusive to those Pokémon. Quite the opposite, in fact. Rarely does a Pokémon legitimately enjoy waiting on their "master." But all 6 of them did.
Their trainer fell asleep long before the storm subsided, but they still kept a close eye on him. It was honestly adorable. They each made a wish. And it was easy for me to grant them; the wishes were all the same. They whispered with each other how much they wanted to repay their master's love. It warmed my heart. I knew I had to help them, so I did. Finally, they settled on a wish. They wanted to be able to serve him properly. They eventually fell asleep, same as their trainer. It was... I think it was a half hour later. Not that it matters. I got started as soon as I was sure they were asleep. Fur and scales became hair and clothing. Their bodies, depending on species, either stretched or shrank. By the time the physical transformations had been completed, all 6 of the former Pokémon were mostly human. They still had their tails, and some other features. Their trainer could already understand them when they spoke their native tongues, but, since it'd be rather odd for them to walk around in public yipping and cooing like the creatures they were moments before, I altered their voices, as well, so they would speak English. This process, by the way, is not painless. None of them were; there's a reason why I waited until they were asleep. By the time I expected they would wake up, most or all of the pain would've gone away. But I wasn't finished yet. They wanted to serve; didn't they?
They were all females. Their trainer isn't sexist. He just doesn't care for burly, musclebound brutes. His preference is for femininity, and it showed in his team. Not that he was ever sexually involved with them. He used to use them in battles, like the majority of trainers do. And, before you ask, no. I don't object to battles. There's a difference between contests of strength and skill, and brutal beatings. Yes, there are occasionally injuries from battles. But accidents can happen from the most innocuous of activities. Sweet, innocent Chansey Scouts trip and fall sometimes. It hurts, you cry, you get a bandage and/or a lollipop, and you go about your day. But I digress.
The trainer of the Pokémon I had just transformed held a spot in the Johto Hall Of Fame, which he earned when his team defeated the six battle-hardened, vicious Pokémon of the former champion, a trainer who thwarted terrorist attacks, traversed the entire Johto and Kanto regions, and tamed even the guardian of the sea and the sacred winged rainbow. But he didn't battle with them after his victory. Following that tremendous upset, he left competitive battling to focus on the medical field. A passion of his for a long time. In fact, even before the championships were a blip on the radar, he showed decent skills, being able to repair minor wounds, and cure minor ailments. To make extra money, he would moonlight at Pokémon Centres. By the time he was considering going to the Indigo Plateau, he barely needed Pokémon Centres for healing his beloved companions; he could fix everything from cuts and stings to broken bones. It seemed like just the natural progression of things; forgive me, but it brings to mind another old saying. "What're you going to do now?" "I'm going to Disney World!~" He used his fame from winning the championship to secure a job at the Pokémon Centre in his hometown. This boy became one of my victims. He has nothing now.
The 6 Pokémon I transformed were a Bellossom, a Goodra, a Pachirisu, a Sylveon, a Vaporeon, and a Wigglytuff. To grant their wishes to be able to serve their master, I turned them into maids. I thought it would go over well with everyone. At least I was right in that respect. For a while, anyway. When they awoke the next morning, they all eagerly began their chores. Vaporeon had the poor luck to be the one to awaken the boy. They had been made to think their roles had always been theirs. I didn't think - damn; that's a theme - I would need to hypnotise him, too. He was furious. Not from being woken up by a beautiful anthropomorphic Vaporeon. But from being waited on.
Trainers can sometimes forget that, were it not for the Pokémon they care for, they wouldn't be trainers. Nor can the Pokémon be champions without trainers to teach them the finer points of combat. Everyone has to work together. Of course, every partnership is different; in some cases, the trainer may have a disability, and their Pokémon have to work harder to come out on top. Or vice versa. I've seen deaf trainers win matches because their Pokémon could understand sign language. I've seen Pokémon with impaired vision use their other senses to outwit and topple opponents. But, at the core of everything, it boils down to teamwork. And these 6 girls were well-versed on the subject, before and after their transformations. As crazy as this is going to sound, after all of the praise I've just given their trainer, it's him that doesn't understand that. But the misunderstanding in this case is probably the opposite of what you might expect. See, he doesn't expect these Pokémon to do everything for him; he would prefer to be the one serving them.
I should explain that I knew this boy before the storm. Well, saying that I knew him is a bit of an understatement. I would go so far as to say we were friends. I'm not going to reveal his name; I've revealed too much about him already. In fact, to be fair, he was submissive with me, too, so I suppose his behaviour towards his Pokémon shouldn't be so surprising to me. But he explained that it's because I'm a Legendary Pokémon. One of many that keep this world balanced. So maybe he has a point. But he spoiled those Pokémon rotten when he was still a trainer. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I guess, since I grant wishes, I do more or less the same thing anyway. He devoted his life to the care of Pokémon. Studying, healing, and training. But it all came crashing down around him when he tried to play Arceus.
The trainer was born fully human; during a rescue mission, he accidentally bonded his soul to an artifact that fused his DNA with that of a female Cinccino. Still, he went on with his life, and even grew to love his new fluff. Until he was raped for it, that is. That was my first mistake; I should've stepped in. I offered him a wish to console him, but couldn't give him what he wished for. With all of his Pokémon being female, he wished to be feminised. Could I have done it? Without a shadow of a doubt. Child's play. But he held a very important job back then - he specialised in emergency medicine when he was a doctor - that would be put in jeopardy if he showed up in a dress and makeup. So I had to refuse. As horrible as this sounds, if he asked again, I'd grant his wish in a heartbeat, now that he's lost his job. Not granting his wish was my second mistake. And, unfortunately, soon after that, he managed to get in far over his head.
His mission was noble; the species he had recently become a member of was, and unfortunately remains, severely endangered. The next time I offered him a wish, he made it right away. His wish was for a massive increase in their population. That was a good bit harder. I can warp bodies, minds, inanimate objects, and more. But creating life is something I'm not at all well-versed in. Mew and Shaymin handle that; in retrospect, I should've asked one of them. Preferably Mew; Shaymin didn't get along well with the boy. I knew I owed him, though, so I tried doing things myself. I won't go into specifics, but I messed up. Big time. Again, I should've asked Mew. My name was certainly mud with the boy and his former Pokémon after that, not that I blame them. But, with that, I struck out with the trainer. As ironic as this sounds, I wish the troubles had ended there. Of course, they didn't. The trainer was ruined, but the girls were in good health. Unfortunately, that was about to change. Starting with Vaporeon.
Vaporeon, objectively, was hit the hardest. But they all suffered. Those poor girls lost their minds, and a good bit more. Even I couldn't have predicted the horrors that would befall them. In a way, it angers me; it really, truly does. So many evil people in this world, yet an innocent boy and 6 innocent Pokémon were harmed, just for making wishes! A wish to help a loved one, and a wish to save an endangered species. Not exactly scandalous. "But Jirachi! Just make everything better!" Believe me, I want to. But I can't do anything unless the request is worded as a wish. Arceus added that rule. And no, I can't just make the wish myself; it doesn't work. I've tried.
As for what happened to the girls - the "horrors that befell them" - it seems each one bears a different curse. Bellossom constantly exudes a ludicrously strong floral scent. Pachirisu cries at the drop of a hat. Wigglytuff is a glutton. Vaporeon is the opposite; she starves herself. Sylveon is addicted to cosmetics. And Goodra is convinced she's the doting mother of her trainer. Huh? Bellossom's fate doesn't sound so bad? She's scrubbed herself raw trying to remove the stench. To no avail. Goodra doesn't sound like she got a bad deal, either. But you don't see her. She has absolutely gone insane. She fills her bedroom with what she insists are framed pictures of the trainer and her. They're all blank.
The victim I see in my dreams changes often, but they die the same way each time! And the deaths, in stark contrast to the victims, aren't pretty. Wigglytuff collapses in agony, dead of a heart attack before reaching the Pokémon Centre. Bellossom is mauled by wild Pokémon. She cries out, but nobody is willing to bear her stench to rescue her. Sylveon is taken into an alleyway, raped, then beaten to death after being drugged while on a date. Vaporeon takes a final, shaking breath in her bed before her organs give out from starvation. Pachirisu, the poor dear, has an emotional breakdown and commits suicide by drinking various cleaning chemicals. And Goodra dies of shock upon finding her "child" hanging from a ceiling fan. 7 images, counting the trainer, that I don't think I'll ever get out of my head. For fuck's sake, every fucking dream is a snuff film! I can't take this much longer!
I can't help them; I want to. I really, really want to! But I can't unless they make wishes, or someone makes wishes for them. Vaporeon was helped by a kind Delphox who wished her back to good health, but her mind is fried; I have absolutely no doubt that she's still gonna starve to death unless someone wishes her shattered psyche back together. I don't blame the Delphox, though. He and his daughter have hearts of gold, the both of them. I'll go to my grave insisting that he had Vaporeon's best interests at heart. As for his daughter, her wish broke my heart. Her mother died when she was too young to remember her. All she knew of her mother was stories, as though she was brought into this world by a fairytale princess. Of course, she wished for her mother back. And, of course, I granted her wish. Sort of. As it happens, her mother was a Cinccino. I can't resurrect the dead, but I can revive their souls. The poor trainer of the 6 ill-fated girls used to have a Cinccino, whom he had recently rediscovered was living comfortably in a nature preserve after being released. Sacrifices were made, and that Cinccino was given the memories of the young lady's mother. Both of them, and the Delphox, still live happy, healthy lives to this day; lucky them.
But for the Delphox and his daughter, I probably would've eaten a shotgun shell quite some time ago. The blood of 7 innocent victims is on my hands, and I can't help them until they ask for it! The Delphox and the trainer are close friends. That's lovely; otherwise, I have a sneaking suspicion the trainer would've been found hanged with his own tail. Maybe that Delphox can turn things around. But, just in case, let me broadcast a plea to everyone reading this.
If any of you see a male Cinccino anthro, or any of the 6 maids I mentioned, I beg you. Please, for the love of Arceus, tell them everything will be alright. And tell them I'm sorry, and that I'll do whatever I can to make everything up to them. Oh, and, if you see me, wish for something that benefits one of them. I promise, if you do, I'll give you a second wish. Whatever you want. That's a promise, literally in writing, from a Legendary. Just make the nightmares stop. If you don't feel sorry for me, which you probably shouldn't, at least do something for their sake. As badly as my nightmares have scarred my mind, at least they end when I wake up. I can't say the same for them.