Jump to content
Strawberry Orange Banana Lime Leaf Slate Sky Blueberry Grape Watermelon Chocolate Marble
Strawberry Orange Banana Lime Leaf Slate Sky Blueberry Grape Watermelon Chocolate Marble

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'review'.



More search options

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Categories

  • Reviews
    • Anime, Hentai, Manga and Other Comics
    • Video Games

Categories

  • News and Announcements

Categories

  • Roleplayer Preferences

Categories

  • Account Settings and Control
  • Profile
  • Roleplay
  • Other

Categories

  • Rules and Required Readings

Categories

  • Private Roleplayers Bulletin Board

Forums

  • Community Announcements and Information Forums
    • News and Announcements
    • EcchiDreams Guides, Rules and Required Readings
    • Suggestions, Comments and Feedback
    • EcchiDreamers Welcome Forum
  • General Interests Lounge
    • Anime, Hentai and Manga
    • Creative Corner
    • Debates and Politics
    • Forum Games
    • Gadgets and Geeks
    • Personal Stories
    • Random Chit Chat
    • Sex and Relationships
    • Video Games
  • Creative Corner
  • Roleplay Suite
    • Game Master's Corner
    • Private Roleplayers Bulletin Board
  • EcchiTown [RP]'s Roleplay
  • EcchiTown [RP]'s Extra Information
  • EcchiTown [RP]'s EcchiCafé (OOC)
  • EcchiDreams' Music and Audio Club's Topics
  • EcchiTown [RP]'s Help?
  • Neko Fans!'s Topics
  • Blackberry Falls's Roleplaying Topics
  • Blackberry Falls's Extra Information Topics
  • EcchiDreams' Music and Audio Club's Ridiculous Finds!
  • Furry's Topics
  • Trap Appreciation Club's Trap Discussions
  • Futanari Fanclub's Topics
  • PC Master Race's Topics

Collections

  • General FAQ's
  • Account and Profile Settings FAQ's
  • Roleplay FAQ's
  • Gallery FAQ's

Found 13 results

  1. Pokémon The Movie: I Choose You!

    I mentioned in a status update that I've been a fan of Pokémon since I was 4. As such, I have been a fan for 20 years of its currently 21-year existance in the US. People say it's just a cartoon for little kids. You know what else is? My Little Pony. And look where that franchise is today. Tom And Jerry, Scooby Doo, and SpongeBob SquarePants are "just" cartoons. That doesn't mean they aren't popular. Pokémon has had a massive impact on my life. It taught me to read. My war veteran grandfather and I played together, and even traded Pokémon! I cried at Bye Bye Butterfree, and I still do. I cried for a half hour straight after Pokémon Ranger And The Temple Of The Sea. When my cousin moved back from Michigan, the first thing we talked about was Pokémon. When my dad caught me smuggling something, it wasn't drugs. It was a copy of Pokémon Silver from his house. So, obviously, I wasn't about to miss the 20th anniversary movie. Only 2 theatres in my hometown of Sarasota, Florida, were showing it. Hollywood 20 and AMC. I chose the AMC, as a ticket was cheaper there. 2 of my 3 younger brothers accompanied me. One 17, the other 7. There was not at all any question that we would enjoy it. The 17-year-old ordered a large slushie, and the 7-year-old had a kid's meal. I ordered a cheeseburger slider combo meal. That, unfortunately, was a bad decision. It had to be cooked, and I missed the first 2 minutes. The 17-year-old assured me that all I missed was essentially Nidorino vs. Gengar, a la the Red and Blue intro. What I did see was nothing short of phenomenal, and those 2 minutes are no longer too big of a deal. About 10 minutes in, the opening credits start, accompanied by a heart-pounding rendition of the original Pokémon theme, which I lip-synced as fervently as if I was singing it at a rock concert. I had assumed that the movie would be a retelling of the Indigo League arc of the Pokémon anime. It was, but only partially. You all know the story by now. A 10-year-old begins a journey through the Kanto region with a Pikachu. But SO much more happens! Brock and Misty are nowhere to be seen until the end credits. But Ash has 2 friends from Sinnoh who follow him. One of them happens to be the daughter of Cynthia, the Sinnoh League champion. All 3 have aspirations. Ash, of course, wants to be a Pokémon master. The girl wants her mother's acceptance. And the boy wants to become a Pokémon professor. The girl has a Piplup, and the boy has a Lucario. So, the 3 go on a journey, as would be expected. But Ash is in possession of a Rainbow Wing. Basically, a feather from Ho-Oh. In the first episode, Ash saw Ho-Oh. The movie is basically about him chasing Ho-Oh, as well as friends and experience. He meets an abandoned Charmander, soon seen to belong to an absolute dick who kicks it when it tries to hug him. This is based on an episode, and becomes a big plot point. Ash wants to show him there are no worthless Pokémon. Along the way, Ash is followed by Marshadow, who eventually becomes the main antagonist. Ash breaks free from Marshadow's corruption, leaving Marshadow to look elsewhere for a host. Unfortunately, in the climax, Marshadow gets ahold of the Rainbow Wing, and gains massive power from it. I won't spoil the climax beyond that. It has to be seen to be believed. I spent the last half of the movie not just crying, but sobbing. Pretty much from their re-creation of Bye Bye Butterfree to the end. My 7-year-old brother repeatedly told me "it's okay." Do I recommend this movie? Fuck. Yes. Do you love Pokémon? You'll be on the edge of your seat throughout the thrilling, theatre-shaking battles. Do you hate Pokémon? Then watch it, to see what you're missing. It's not just a cartoon. It's a heart-wrenching masterpiece that it should be criminal to miss.
  2. As my username goes, I watch a lot of anime, an unhealthy amount. I've found a lot of shows that were pretty great. I've found a lot of shows that I wasn't super fond of. After being pointed to this part of the site, I figured I'd give this a shot, see how things go. If this goes well, I'll try to put up more reviews of other shows. Now, it's time to raise our determination to fist, I'm gonna start things off with a review of one of my personal favorite shows, Symphogear. To start off, this is a magical girl anime with tons of over-the-top action scenes, strangely entertaining characters, and catchy J-Pop soundtrack. The show is currently wrapping up it's fourth season and a fifth season is already in the works, so it's clear that this series is going strong. Sure it's not perfect, there's quite a few moments that leave you groaning and rolling your eyes, but the show is just a blast to watch overall. All you need to do is kick back, turn your brain off, and enjoy the spectacle. One thing that many viewers will notice is that the show involves a lot of music. In order to activate their powers, the main characters must sing in order to synchronize with their weapons, using them almost like a tuning fork, so a good chunk of the cast consists of voice actresses that are also popular idols, such as Nana Mizuki (Hinata Hyuga from Naruto), Aoi Yuuki (Madoka Kaname from Madoka Magica), and Yoko Hikasa (Rias Gremory from Highschool DxD). The music is emphasized so heavily that there are times that the concert scenes seem to have more of a budget than a lot of other important scenes. The majority of the music is pretty catchy though, each character's songs having a different theme. For example, the girl that fights with guns and artillery has a bit more of a rock/metal tone to her songs, while the girl that fights with a katana has more of a classical Japanese tone to her songs. Another thing you notice about the show as you watch, some of the weapons get kind of ridiculous. Sure you've got your typical weapons, girl with katana, girl who punches, girl who fires guns. However, things start to get strange like sword divekicks and guns becoming massive missiles. There's even one girl that fights with saw blades (I feel that someone watched Gurren Lagann and decided that saw blades will be the next big thing after drills). The main heroine, at the start of the series her weapon is arguably the weakest of them all, that being her fists, but after a bit of training and a few moments where she goes berserk, she quickly gets to the point where her fists turn into giant pile bunkers and she's punching her way through mountains. As for the story, it's kind of forgettable. The first season feels like it's clearly drawing off the popularity of Madoka Magica, with the series having a bit of a dark and angsty tone to it, an ancient goddess summoning otherworldly... things while trying to build up a tower of babel to take down the moon to end God's curse on humanity and allow her to ascend into godhood (actually I think she's trying to get some of God's D). Okay, so the show starts to get weird by the end of the first season once the villain reveals her true plans, and the show starts to roll with that weirdness when the second season introduces their next villain, a scientist that you can totally trust by the end of the first episode. The mad scientist steals the show with his constant loud and violent outbursts, his twisted desire to become a hero, and by the fact that he's voiced by Tomokazu Sugita (Gintoki Sakata from Gintama). As the series goes on, the premise continues to get weirder as the threats get bigger, and as a result, the action scenes get bigger and more explosively entertaining. Of course the show isn't perfect, there's a few parts that aren't that great. I've already mentioned that the first season is a bit angsty and drags on a little as the show kind of tries to figure out what it wants to be. The second season has a few moments where you're kind of bored because the villain might've stolen the show a bit too much. Season 3 has a sub-plot where the main heroine reconnects with her estranged father, the only problem is that he's a dirtbag and the show makes it obvious that we have to care about him. There's also a brief point in the third season where the main heroine is refusing to fight, not exactly something the viewer wants to deal with while watching a show that's popular for it's fight scenes. So, is the show perfect? No. Is it fun to watch? Yes. I would definitely love to see more people talking about it. I personally love the show for how dumb the story gets and how crazy that action scenes get. The music is catchy, there are enough characters for most viewers to find a favorite (best gurl), and it's always fun to wonder how the show is going to top it's last crazy stunt from the last episode. If you can get passed the rough patches, I feel that a lot of people can come to enjoy this show. I hope I gave a decent review, I hope that I've encouraged some of you to go out and watch this show, and I hope I didn't spoil too much of the plot (however much you care about it). And before I go, I'd like to leave you all with this. ;)
  3. Temaelrin Reviews: Elite: Dangerous

    To start; I’d like to make it clear that I have no personal, or professional relationship with the developers. I have not received money, or any rewards (Digital, Material, Sexual or otherwise) to give this review. However I do have a personal bias for Frontier Developments, as I have stated in my teaser. Being a massive fan of Frontier: Elite II, I have been waiting for at least a decade for a new game in the series and here it finally is. Yes; I realise this isn’t a Game Reviews site, and it’s just a section within a Hentai community of all places but what can I say, EcchiDreams is pretty diverse, but not at the expense of ethical practices. Minimum System Requirements are as follows: Windows 7 Quad Core CPU (4 x 2Ghz) 4 GB System RAM (more is always better) DX 10 hardware GPU with 1GB video ram Nvidia GTX 260 ATI 4870HD Continuous Internet Connection (Internet = Always On) With four hundred billion stars, some people will say “But even if I play online, and even if everyone on Earth played and didn’t stick to one system it’d feel empty” but I’d say “Elite Dangerous makes you appreciate the unfathomable vastness of space, where you can explore and may never see human’s ever again, if you so wished and I think to be able to explore gallivant around the Galaxy is a very generous trade off… In my case I’m probably getting a very sweet deal”. There is a sense of pride and wonder when you are exploring a system that potentially no one has ever been in before, and perhaps no one will ever go to. Elite: Dangerous is set in 3301 (34th Century). Graphically speaking Elite: Dangerous is inspiring, each point of light is an actual star within the universe, unlike the X-Series in which it seems like a fixed image wrapped around your view. Nebulae and even the galactic core gets bigger the closer you travel to them too, which really adds to the all immersion of the game. As for resolutions, even though there aren’t monitors capable of displaying it the game can be played on 4k, 8k and even 16k resolutions. I personally use 2715x1527 (DSR by Nvidia) on a 1920x1080 screen, ultra settings (of course) and sometimes I get lost in the stunning visuals from time to time. Stars look almost fluid like, and speaking of which - every planet follows a real time orbit which means if you are in orbit of a planet and wait long enough you’ll see Day and Night cycles, and this is true with stations, some of which the planet eclipse’s the systems star which causes night to fall on them. The level of detail and design is absolutely breathtaking when you stop to look at it. I am concerned by the lack of lighting on the dark side of a planet, from cities that you’d expect to see on Earth. But from what I read this morning this will be added into the next update. Music and sounds is by far where Elite: Dangerous knocks most games I’ve played out of the ballpark. The satisfying “Pop” when a ship explodes, the sounds of the engines (which is different in every ship I have tried so far) to the weapons systems - absolutely amazing. I have included a video of actual game play (my game play) which shows what I am talking about. Although the one thing I do have complaints about here is the quality of VoIP, which leaves a lot to be desired. Elite: Dangerous features a fully dynamic economy and galaxy. Meaning what we (as players) do, does affect the system or galaxy (if the “thing” is big enough to) in a number of ways. As of yet I’m not sure if this is a good thing or not, as it’s a computer game I suspect an exploit in something is going to unfairly balance something and cause the carefully stacked deck of cards to come crashing down. But this as far as I am aware hasn’t happened yet, so fingers crossed? Something a lot of people have complained about is the Docking Mechanics, now call me a fanboy but I say “Learn how to fucking dock then” and word of advice; don’t completely trust the Auto Docking Computer either - the one time I took my eyes off of it, was the one time it did something really fucked up and got stuck inside the station’s textures… How the hell it managed that - I have no idea (I wasn’t looking), certainly don’t take your eyes off it when using it with a Lakon Type 6, because that bitch will skid across the docking pad like butter in a frying pan. The Classical music (Blue Danube) is a nice touch and feel like a economically privileged bastard when I’m using it, perhaps the only time I will feel that way. Controls took a little while to get used to, but once I got used to them they’re almost second nature, although I did change the mouse behaviour and tweaked the A and D keys for rolling to more fit my style of playing, the keys are fully customisable and whilst I haven’t had chance to try it out yet- the 360 controller does work quite well with it although a specialised Joystick and Throttle is supposedly the best way to (and the way in which your character) operate(s) the ship, but I can’t justify paying for one of those when my current set up works just nicely. Unfortunately one complain I have here with the GUI is when Hardpoints are deployed, let’s say I have a beam laser on my primary and missiles on my secondary. Primary is triggered by the left button and secondary is triggered by the right button. So why in Gaben’s name is Primary put on the right of the screen and secondary put on the left? That doesn’t seem very intuitive at all. Then we get to Gameplay Mechanics… Currently you start off in a small Sidewinder (or Eagle if you got the Beta, like I did - I still don’t condone Pre-Ordering especially after Egosoft’s debacle) and 1,000 credits. You’re in a space station (LHS 3447 for most people, for some reason I stated at LHS 1914) and what you do from there is your business. Start a trading job, do missions, be a courier, pirate, bounty hunter, explorer, asteroid miner, whatever! The World(STRIKE) Galaxy is your oyster. It’s “Level” progression is split into three camps “Combat” “Trade” and “Exploration” of which you can “Progress” the ranks independently. There are also a number of “Super Power” groups such as the Federation, the Empire and the Alliance and countless of smaller groups, organisations, corporations and so on, each with their own missions and such. The only loading screen I see for the whole game is the one when you go into a game, other than that there aren’t any visible loading screens. We are in the 21st 34th Century - It’s about damn time. There is currently a serious problem that needs addressing with the Private Group feature in that if the group is split on different servers you can absolutely forget about trying to talk with them, massage them and even see/meet up with them in game. Both/All sides must restart the game just to have a chance of connecting to the same server. This is majorly off putting and at times frustrating, especially when the game decides to move you to a different instance to your friend(s) in mid-game. Exploring What I personally would like to see is spatial anomalies and “Weirdness” that could be backed by science, like newly formed systems, T Tauri type stars in which cloud matter surrounds them, alien races or particle fountains! I understand we’re going for realism here but then… When I checked HDE 226868 it didn’t even have a black hole in the system, let alone a star having it’s mass being “consumed” by one. As for HR 7012 I see no planetary collision, in a game that prides itself on realism with stuff we (As humans) know, this was majorly disappointing and sorely underwhelming, at this point I’m hazarding a guess that Fomalhaut doesn’t have the dust cloud, but I haven’t been there, yet. There are more bones to pick with Blackholes in the game such as time dilation and/or spaghettification, but seeing as I haven’t seen one since Beta/Gamma I have no idea if they’ve improved or not (I haven’t been to HDE 226868 since Gamma either). 'Don’t fuck me around on this, Elite' I'd protest. Other than actually going to them and seeing them myself - I know my stars and shit but basically what I am saying here is this mechanic (Exploring) could do with some work. Some have asked “Why aren’t there Quasars?” Because there isn’t actually any in our Galaxy (that we know of), so this is accurate. Although fun fact; some scientists believe that we might have one that "comes back to life" when Andromeda and the Milkyway merge in several billion years time. You can make a fair bit of money off Exploring, but I really didn’t bother until I got an Advanced Scanner. You can sell the exploration data to any (as far as I know) starport for some cash, as long as the explored system is 20LY or more away- fair enough… However I found there was little to no point in it unless you got yourself an Advanced Discovery Scanner, not that I am complaining about this. I think it’s great that there are extra tiers to the Discovery Scanner. Trust me you’ll want one, if your aim is to explore. Combat Combat is amazing, for me I find that the blue bar on the speedometer is the “Sweet Spot” that allows me to turn faster, and I highly recommend investing in a Kill Warrant Scanner if you’re a bounty hunter, you will not be disappointed. Unfortunately… As you can see in the video this is far from perfect. For example if a Federal Security Service ship nicks you (hits you accidently in combat) there’s no apologies, they’re not wanted, nor do they face repercussions. You hit anything but a target that isn’t “WANTED” and you’re in for it. 200cr fine, which seems reasonable-ish, but the problem is every fucking “Cop” will be after your blood. Yes I suspect my aim might not be good, but come on - when a ship comes up from under you quickly OBVIOUSLY seeing you’re firing then they should expect to get hit… Seems a bit “Entrapment(y)” and "Overkill" to me. Protip: Resource Extraction Sites are the best place to “Farm” easy kills. If you’re into Piracy you might want to consider this too. I know I am. I highly recommend doing the “Combat Training Demo” before doing any combat. It should also be noted that Resource Extraction Sites are significantly more demanding on the GPU for obvious reasons. Trade Trade back in Beta used to be pretty awesome, especially with Slopey’s Trade Calculator tool which Frontier Developments seem to not like the use of (as it scraped market data from their servers) as a result we have to use manually updated data. This is fine with me as far as I am concerned - to a degree. You see in Elite: Dangerous there is a number of systems that I’m going to call “Open” about their trade information and such (Systems you don’t have to spend in game Credits in order to obtain the information), these systems should be allowed to be scraped for these calculators… At the very least I’d expect useful information when I buy trade data, as it currently stands it’s useless. Trade as far as I am concerned right now is pretty broken, although I did make 8/9 million off of buying Palladium at Worlidge Terminal at LHS 3447 then selling it at Cleve Hub in Eravate. Its several trips mind, and the way back to Worlidge is pretty time consuming but worth it if you have a Cobra MkIII, with lots of cargo space or a Lakon Type 6, or bigger ship with lots of cargo space. (Free tip there) Extra Stuff There was some controversy a month before release when Frontier Developments announced that there wasn’t going to be an offline mode, this is probably due to the fact that the game is dynamic, and action affect the Galaxy (or portions of) now the gameplay itself is endless server costs and maintenance isn’t and there is a bit of uncertainty as to what will happen. What compacts this problem is the features that will be implemented over time in Expansion Packs which is even more concerning - because I’m sensing “£40 for Expansion Pack”. Some of these features I was under the impression would be included, but eh it is what it is. What it does have going for it is that the Developers are also players of the game, and it’s something they very clearly have a lot of pride in as it can be seen in the next video, it’d definitely seem that there is much for them to do as there is for us (the players to do) and to see this kind of enthusiasm from a dev team on a game… Is heart warming. Features we can expect to be included in these “Expansion Packs” are apparently: Landing / driving / prospecting on airless rocky planets, moons & asteroids Walking around interiors and combative boarding of other ships Combat and other interactions with other players and AIs in the internal areas of star ports Accessing richly detailed planetary surfaces (and even cities) Availability of giant ‘executive control’ ships to players In Conclusion Now I’m already sensing that there is going to be at least one comment saying “Star Citizen is better!” And quite frankly I don’t care, lets set something clear. We haven’t had a decent space simulator to this magnitude and quality in a very long time, certainly not with this generation of computers. But really they have a lot of differences and it’s like comparing Golden Apples, to Golden Oranges; they’re both Golden and Fruit, as well as not very edible (I’d imagine) but that’s it - they’re different. That said if the rumours of StarCitzen’s Pay2Win are overblown or false I might pick up that game too, and review it… Unfortunately; despite its flaws, Elite: Dangerous has me, well and truly hooked. Elite: Dangerous feels like and is pretty much a Work in Progress, but it’s a damn fine Work in Progress and I look forward to the new features and future updates. I do fear for some aspects of this game’s future, I was a late backer due to money constraints (I couldn’t afford 2x Alpha copies, otherwise I’d of gotten ten) and there is a lot of work that needs to be done in some areas. However this game is fucking awesome, graphically, sounds, immersion, music, it’s hit after hit and in these areas it does feel very well polished. I do like the fact that this game is dynamic, none of those scripted cheap ass endings we saw in Mass Effect 3 and I think I will be playing it for years to come. The problems with this game are small or are outweighed by positives. I feel most of the things wrong with this game can be fixed, and probably will be fixed at some point. It certainly did better on launch than X-Refail even if comparing those to games is like comparing a Golden Apple to a Kick in the Bollocks. Pros: Ability to play Solo or Private Group instead of jumping into public. Music and Sounds. Graphics, obviously. Somewhat future proofed with 4k, 8k and 16k graphics and textures. Truly Dynamic Economy. A truly dynamic galaxy, shaped by the Players actions. Immersive. VR/Oculus Compatible. Exceptional attention to detail. 400-billion fucking star systems! Extremely promising future. Absolutely free-ranged. Dedicated and passionate staff behind it. Cons: Bugs with the Private Groups is infuriating. Systems that we know of, aren’t accurately portrayed. VoIP is dodgy, at best. VR/Oculus Compatible (I don’t have one ~envy~) Authorities over-react to NPC’s Pilot error. Trade Data is useless. It’s online only (this is a deal breaker for some). Well worth your money? If you like this genre of games then hell yes it is. Please note that this article was originally posted up on January 23rd 2015; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.
  4. Temaelrin Reviews: X-Rebirth

    If you don't want to read any back story - please skip to the big text saying "My Review". [I'm not a professional reviewer just decided to make a post in here. Might make it a regular occurrence... Who knows.] As many of you already know, I’m the Site Administrator for EcchiDreams, but in my spare time (what little of it) I play a lot of video games. I’m a PC gamer myself (Preferably with a 360 Controller. The best controller, in my opinion, in existence – Today anyway), I used to play on the Xbox 360, and I grew up playing games on the Basic Amstrad CPC464 (First ever PC, 1994), Amiga A600 (1995) and eventually a Windows PC (1996+). One of the first space games I ever played was in 1998, (Just 8 years old) and I had to code a DOS program to be ran at the startup of my PC (because I had Windows 98, not good for running old DOS games). So basically I edited the autoexec.bat file in my C: drive (I believe) and injected my own script to run making the machine a multi-boot with MS-DOS with HighMem, and Windows 98 for my other games. It was a lot of fuss but it was what I went through to start playing Frontier Elite 2 (David Braben), and boy once I got it. I didn’t stop playing it. Then in 1999, I had to severely upgrade my computer just to run X-Beyond the Frontier (Egosoft), as even the though my machine matched the recommended requirements it still wasn’t enough, but it was so worth it when I finally got the components and was able to start playing it (And believe me I played for a long time). (Thanks Dad! Whenever he upgraded his PC, I got the hand-me-downs. Useful because I ended up building lots of computers and start experimenting!) I truly believe at the time that it was the most realistic thing I had ever experienced in a game! To some degree I believe to this day that it was ahead of its time and it is! It still looks somewhat good even today especially when compared to Frontier Elite 2, my only point of reference. Frontier Elite 2: 1993 – David Braben X-Beyond the Frontier: 1999 – Egosoft I really felt my nine year old mind being fully immersed in what was going on, a part of the story line and Ban Dana of the Argon One was my brother and leader into the battle against the Xenon. I had to spend hours and hours of my childhood gaining the trust of the Peaceful Kingdom of Boron’s assistance in the fight, The Paranoid Forces of the Paranid, the Warrior Clans of the Split, Even the Greedy Scales of the Teladi to unite all species to work together to achieve a common goal. To stop the Xenon. (Only it hasn’t really stopped them at all.) But it’s uniting the known universe for the greater good that was the main focus point and I believe that was well achieved. Of course then there was the building of the Factories to get a constant stream of Credits for weapons. It made it challenging, worth it. I replayed that again when X-Tension came out unfortunately there was no sight of it in UK shops, I couldn’t get a copy. Even when getting it off eBay it turned out to be a copy boy was I ever pissed. Nowerdays I have it on Steam, cost me fuck all (Humble Bundle) and yet when I see how easy it is to get a copy now compared to back then (two years I spent trying to get it!)… Oh the memories. I know at the time back then there was a massive hoo-har about it being “Unremarkable” as it had no plot. No story line. But I see and understand what Egosoft were trying to get at with this “Extension”. It was just a no-bullshit addon for X-Beyond the Frontier that added a TON of new things. I’ve never actually played it at length though… Never got round to it because in 2003 Egosoft released another game. X-Tension is slightly more improved in graphics to X-Beyond the Frontier. X-Tension: 2000 – Egosoft X2: The Threat 2003 - Egosoft X2: The Threat, I pre-ordered without question. Damn it I wasn’t going to miss another game, by this point I never played X-Tension at all so I was pretty psyched to get it a day before it was actually due to be released (Thank you Amazon for Premature Ejaculations of Games.) I got an upgrade and remembered what I learnt from X-BtF (X-Beyond the Frontier), go above the recommended specs! Despite all this the game just never ran I didn’t get it to run until after I moved home, and was in school (So about May 2003). After getting a hold of updates (Which I had to download at school due to not being in a broadband area) and patches from Egosoft (which I had to download at a friend’s house because Egosoft.com was blocked at school, well until I hacked the shit out of that… But we will leave out how a secondary school student in the UK was able to access porn at school shall we?) I was able to update my machine and play it. In my naïve mind I didn’t see that this was a sign of things to come, now Egosoft are renown for releasing shit, fixing and ending spectacularly which is hardly ever disastrous. </sarcasm> Needless to say there was a fuckton more to explore, and I had great fun. Sticking into it pretty good and spending more time on my PC than out there “Socialising” to be honest I still prefer it today honestly. The fact that I can do both now is something I’m still… Getting used to. I spent a lot of time starting up my space empire, I found unknown sectors, (Boldy gone where no one’s gone before!) and decided to set up shop there, (Until I discovered some drained shields or ate hull) so once reloading a save I set up shop again in a good Unknown Sector and started my empire eventually having enough credits to expand until I had a space station in nearly every sector, and fleets in nearly every sector. I was quite proud of myself, honestly. Then 2005 I decided to give Egosoft another chance, X3: The Reunion which I preordered. This time I got it a day late, by this point I had already started reading the reviews coming in for the game. I remember the negative ones still and the fans who were defending it. This is why I stear clear from that whole area and think upon what I THINK of the game not what a group says I should think. That said it installed properly and I could play it… For a little while. It was bugged to fuck. Fuck. I had to wait for a few months for Egosoft to make patches which I downloaded and tried out. Luckily; those patches were effective and I got used to a whole new interface, and I didn’t like the no cockpit thing at all at first, but I don’t know it’s grown on me. The fucking graphics though! ~low whistle~ DAMN. Then 2008 the BEST game ever to come out from Egosoft with Graphics that’d make anyone just want to pick up a spliff and relax at. X3: The Reunion: 2005 – Egosoft X3: Terran Conflict: 2008 – Egosoft I don’t recall getting any problems with X3: Terran Conflict; it installed perfectly, ran perfectly and I had a pretty beefy PC that was capable of running it perfectly, and I got into it hard. Even when I moved to my Acer Aspire 8930G in 2010/2011 I was using it play this game. This was meant to so much to me that I literally included it as a major part of my EPSI Federation piece in the Andromeda RP. It was the “Framework” I used to build and shape their history and included actual game play in with the RP. Just keep that in mind, because the in a bit there is a head turner. I mean the Graphics... Wow. I’ve spent a good few hours in Albion Prelude (Although have not really being taking part in story line) but that’s just an addon in my opinion to X3: Terran Conflict. This was all before I used Steam (Started 2012). TRADE. FIGHT. BUILD. THINK. They actually meaned something to me. The whole point of these X Games, all in space. Now that’s a game. Imagine my surprise when I saw this trailer for X-Rebirth: Please watch with sound/subtitles. At the time of writing this there were no annotations or links throughout the video. I was so excited that it went straight to number 1 on my wish list and a friend of mine was very generous in getting it for me as a pre-order. I was (and still am despite the nasty experience with the game) very grateful to them, but this person is a private person and wishes to remain anonymous so I can’t thank them publicly but I have thanked them several times personally). There’s only two things I looked forward to this year; X-Rebirth and Doctor Who. WOW! THEY TOPPED X3: TERRAN CONFLICT?! No. They didn't even top Frontier Elite 2 in my opinion. Now for my review... I think X-Refail is an appropriate title to this review. There have been some on Meta Critic that have called it X-Stillbirth, I’d never be so offensive in publicly calling it that, but it’s fairly accurate as well as offensive, unfortunately. So well played in my opinion. Oh and yes I truly feel awful for thinking that. Yes! X-Rebirth was an unmitigated disaster, despite Egosoft calling it a success. Yes it reached number 1 in sales on Steam, but I wonder how many of them will be calling for a refund? Oh wait… I know I shouldn’t have expected X4 and I wasn’t but for fuck sakes… What the fuck is this?! THIS TOOK SEVEN YEARS?! Holy shit, sounds like you need The Doctor more than I do! There are so many bugs in the game that people haven’t even been able to play it yet. I have but only to a point; you see there are several large game breaking bugs in it. They’re so bad I think all of current progress is useless (I’ve been compensating by running around picking up loot and selling it oh then I cheated. I decided to start editing my save game to try and undo some of the damage that’s been done. Then I came to realisation as I came away from the story line. This game has worse problems than the fucking awful bugs and these can’t be fixed with a quick and simple patch. Something went fundamentally wrong in the creation of this game, and how no one spotted the bugs is beyond my current understanding at the moment. I blame either subjective blindness or stupidity to be perfectly honest. It doesn’t even feel complete and a lot of core features (ones that made the game so good were stripped!) It feels like a dumbed down version of an X-Game but like before X-Beyond the Frontier or something. Then logical explanations found by fans shed some light on it. The theory goes; The Game was designed for Consoles then for some reason Egosoft decided to scrap that and port it to PC. Which doesn’t make sense seeing as all their games have been PC based (then Linux/Mac I believe) not console basically. You can’t replicate that kind of complex system on a console and to be honest I’d never play a console version of an X game. PC vs XBOX vs PS bullshit aside, I PREFER to being able to upgrade parts in my PC than to buy a new console which (No offence) doesn’t even compare to my PC. The trailer made some pretty start demands. I felt betrayed when I realised about this (Thank you Steam User: Mr $team [http://steamcommunity.com/id/cerealkilla007/images/?appid=2870] for helping me remember this). Egosoft outright lied (some say) worse than Electronic Arts and even more so blatantly. "…your actions truly matter when every ship and every space station is a part of a fully simulated universe…" Be honest, really most of these ships are just cannon fodder and it doesn't make a blind bit of difference (Perhaps only in reputation with factions) if I start fly swatting, really. It’s even more noticeable when these ships are coming out of these ridiculous highways. Also... "manage your empire with help from people you hire aboard gigantic space cities" What Gigantic Space Cities? Where were these? I recall some docks on a space station, but not actual cities. I wasn't expecting the Citadel from Mass Effect (Another EA reference) but geez. Frontier Elite 2 had a more functional (and variant) space dock, at least it had a BBS. This FELT like a joke. In every X-Game since X-Tension you’ve been able to pilot more than one ship, let’s face in even Frontier Elite 2 got that dynamic right. It makes a game feel more customisable if you can pick your own ship and what parts go into it. If I want an Argon Titan (Lord knows why) all loaded with shockwave generators then fuck. Then that’s what I’m going to make and pilot! We got to customise the ship based on our abilities and what we were good and not good at it’s what made it fun and exciting. This… FEELS like a console game. There’s no denying it. This guy sums up much of my review and quite honestly I share in his frustration. If I ever meet this man, I’d buy him a pint. The campaign (Story mode) is fucked to buggery to be blunt, and the lack of space stations (Nothing stopping from having small stations too was there?!) was insulting. I never completed the game, I got snagged on a Gamebreaker, that’s the bad type of bug that usually comes with a shit storm of angry computer smashin’ fun. [No didn’t allow it to get me that far. Close though </joke>] SETA has been ditched (Yay!) and replaced with some weird Freelancer feeling type shit. Ugh. It felt like a rewind back to the last decade or so; and that’s bad because a decade or so ago they were beyond their time and each time they did this over and over again, and this game has only set the bar backwards. Hell a re-release of X3: Terran Conflict with elements of this game would have been a much better implementation of all this. Egosoft have been rather good at recovering from disastrous releases, they’re able to patch bugs quickly and show some of that fine German Efficiency at doing it. But this is different, I feel if all the bugs were fixed the game would still be extremely incomplete, from start to finish I have been very disappointed and disgusted about being lied to and offended that they see this as a success. I made this point on their Facebook, Steam and Site and I’ve ran into Fan’s that question my Fandom of the series as a hole. I’d say I was an Egosoft Fan but I’m not a part of the Fandom if that makes sense at all. I probably sound like a rambling hipster now. >_< Bringing up what I said earlier, I incorporated their games into a creation of mine to help build it up. I don’t expect anything from it, of course; but I’d say that makes me qualified to be a fan, personally. Being a fan doesn’t mean I will take part in the silly debate going on, on Steam. It also doesn’t mean I will push my beliefs in other faces. Instead I decided to make a thread on my own site, and if people want to read it then fair play to them. Likewise if not; then whatever. No hard feelings. This is why I hate fan groups. I don’t see myself as better than them by all means but I just don’t see the point in arguing about it. It’s all perspective. This is my perspective. Summary: X Rebirth is just a pile of wank, except that at least leaves a nasty mess for someone to clean up this game is sadly a bit Beyond that Frontier. Egosoft admitted [http://www.incgamers.com/2013/11/egosoft-apologise-for-the-state-of-x-rebirth] that there were nasty bugs in the game and are already working hard in patching it. But as people have stated quite clearly already patches can only do so much; nothing can quite fix the mess that was released on the 15th November 2013. Egosoft in my opinion have to answer for a lot of questions from their loyal (and crazy*) fans. What went wrong? What happened? Why were we lied to? Why did we get rid of what fucking worked and expanded on in X3: Terran Conflict? Who passed off this game? The list goes on… Then I found out that there’s only a very limited amount of sectors overall. Wow… Fuck-this-game. I suppose the DLC for X Rebirth will be 2 more sectors for £14.99, or 4 more sectors for £24.99. <- At the time of this post, it was intended as a joke. Some people have said that this will probably be the end of Egosoft, and there’s no doubting they’ve lost a lot loyal fans trust over this, myself included. Some are fine with it, and in my opinion, that’s good for you. But I’m not fine with it. Nothing’s stopping you from putting up a positive review. Oh and I discovered I have a twitchy finger with this game. I use the keyboard and mouse, because in other games the X-Box controller doesn’t work with it and honestly… I accept that. This game does work with the controller found out today. Apparently easier to use too. Fuck. Anyway every so often I’d just left click to make small adjustments to movement when all of a sudden, twitch, I’ve opened fire on a space station. The storyline likes substance too. PMC and Albion whatevers are supposed to be hatin’ each other? Why aren’t they fighting? Why are they living side by side each other and shit? Why am I the one singled out and attacked by PMC? Come to think of it when a PMC dickwad starts shooting at me, none of my Albion friends come to my aid? In the previous X-Games I could at least hail a station and ask for assistance, in this game I fucking get told off and punished by Albion when I return fire on a PMC ship? But if these sides hate each other wh-? You see, that’s console logic. That’s why I play PC games. This game has poor graphics considering the standards Egosoft keep raising, even worse voice acting than ever, shittier music and no value in terms of game play. I can't write this review and remain unbaised as best I can with how cynical I am. There's nothing nice to say and the only things that there are is force feeded my cynicism. So I guess I failed here just like Egosoft failed with this piece of garbage. And Update: Unconfirmed reports of 360 code has been screenshotted from a shaders folder installed with X Rebirth; this is significant because it shows why the chose to stick with DirectX 9. Some have said it was like they made it for the 360 found it wouldn't work and booted it out the door for the PC instead, which is really shameful behaviour in my opinion and if this is true I think we're rightfully owed an explanation. If this was the case the best moral thing Egosoft could do is stand up and admit they screwed us, answer our questions and learn from their feedback. Sales have also fallen sharply on Steam but then again there is apparently an AAA title up there at -40% off. Perhaps someone somewhere is burying this game back into a blackhole where it belongs, in my opinion. Can Egosoft fix it? Well they think they can fix the bugs at least. I still think it's a little beyond that personally. If it does get better and my opinion changes and perhaps I can put something nice in, then I'll come back to this with an addition review (This will remain here) until then lets see if David Braben's Elite IV: Dangerous can make a stunning return as well as RSI's Star Citizen (I should bloody well say so with over $27 Million funding it. Can't wait to review that. But I don't think I'll preorder anymore, and I'll hope my outstanding pre-orders pay off. *Crazy and its meaning are meant as a perception orientated observation. >_> Please note that this article was originally posted up on November 17th 2013; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.
  5. [I'm not a professional reviewer just decided to make a post in here. Might make it a regular occurrence... I do have plenty of Hentai, who knows? I don't expect everyone to agree with my views or opinions, and if yours differs please feel free to reply/leave a comment. But lets keep this rational.] I watched this the only way I could and would ever watch a Hentai; English Subbed (Because the only other language I remotely know is Russian even then... It's pretty much "Hello" and "Can I use the toilet?") and Japanese Dubbed (Because English Dubbing sends to sound shallow, flat, uninspiring and worst of all- Juvenile. In my opinion). Kuro Ai: Hitoyozumakan Inkou Rannyuuroku A.K.A Dark Love is a very strange Hentai indeed; it starts off with a tentacle rape/tentacle fucking that should give the viewer some indication of what's to come, yet in Episode 1 this is the last time we see a good ol' fashioned Tentacle Scene. I watch this the only way I could and would ever watch a Hentai; English Subbed (Because the only other language I remotely know is Russian even then... It's pretty much "Hello" and "Can I use the toilet?") and Japanese Dubbed (Because English Dubbing sends to sound shallow, flat, uninspiring and worst of all- Juvenile. In my opinion). The Sex Scenes are on Crack and the Characters are quite possibly on Cocaine and Speed. Welcome to Dark Love. When I first saw this in 2010; it was immediately hailed as my favourite Hentai of all time, so it's interesting now in 2013 (nearly 2014) that I'd review it again nearly four months on and almost 9 years after episode one was released. Since 2005 the world of Hentai has changed, perhaps forever. So a lot has happened since this was released and I definitely don't think it'd be released today. To say it's "Absolutely Not For Children" would be perhaps the biggest understatement ever; some adults can't even cope with the stuff that goes on in this Hentai. But I'm a little older now, and I believe I can analyse it at least somewhat objectively with hardly any bias. Fingers crossed. The plot according to ANN states "Tetsuya's investigation into a luxurious hotel turns over a nest of yakuza and a bizarre orgy cult. On rich silk sheets and velvet chairs, the rich and powerful participate in sex acts so depraved that just witnessing them is likely to turn a man into a monster. But the true purpose of this cult is a pact with evil energies that can literally turn Tetsuya into an inhuman demon." Well I'm glad someone has an idea what's going on; I've watched this Hentai about six times already and each time I learn more, I pick more up from it in terms of trying to follow the plot. Perhaps its because I have to read it all (Which no doubt things probably got lost in translation in) but that's not the only thing, as I said earlier the characters seem to be on some kind of speed enhancing narcotic, blink and you probably missed a key part of the story, and if that wasn't bad enough it seems the sex scenes are placed in just the correct format to completely distract you from the Story Line. Did anyone else find it a little bit strange that Tetsuya Gojou's work can be helped by standing outside of a school for (what I assume is for) girls? Come on... I'm the first to say there are ligitmate reasons why grown men might be around a school (Teacher, Parent, etc) but even in context that's strange. Now usually this isn't such a bad thing, distraction with some kinky pleasure, and on that regard it works. But the problem is, that's not the only thing that's distracting. The Sex Scenes contain a lot of flashing, and quite frankly high quality GIF like pictures on a 1ms transitional or something (Hence the Crack comment.) Now whilst I see what the producers were trying to do with this, I feel that it was just simply too fast with lacking frames, it was like watching a computer game lag. Then there's the fucking dialogue during the sex scenes, I find it hard to take any of them seriously anymore, even taken out of context it's annoyingly, humorously distracting at best and not in the good way. So yeah... On the topic of distractions during the sex if the above wasn't enough, something rather strange happened in the first sex scene. Without giving too many spoilers away (if you haven't watched it already) Miyabi came into the bedroom of Tetsuya Gojou, a phone tucked half in her thigh high as she crawled her way up Tetsuya Gojou's bed. The Phone was connected to a phone call with Ayaka Utsumi (From what I can tell; she's Tetsuya Gojou's girlfriend.) Where she could hear her lover climaxing because Miyabi was giving him a weird blowjob/titjob. Obvious Ayaka Utsumi heard this and was deeply upset that her beloved would cheat on her. So far, so good. Then the music changed, and things started getting weird. They were being watched by Hazuki Sogawa who at this point is masturbating furiously, I think pretending that that Tetsuya Gojou was doing this to her, but then strangely so was his now Ex-Girlfriend (She dumped him apparently). The sex scene jumped back and forward from this rape scene to these two women jiffing themselves off. That was confusing and I'm not entirely certain that upon hearing that news and reacting like that the first thing anyone would do is furiously masturbate over the cheating partner fucking them like this. So yeah that was a little confusing to be honest. Apparently duc, his well-being doesn't seem to be his biggest priority at the moment. The more I tried analysing this Hentai the more I got quite cynical about it and I didn't really know what it was. As I said previously the more times I watched it the more it appeared to change my perspective into what exactly I just watched. I love that they crammed so many fetishes into one bag but the scene were we had wiggly worms being inserted up the anus of Hazuki Sogawa... Personally not thing, and I personally don't know who on Earth would find that sexually pleasing. (But apparently it's a real thing, so I withhold my judgement on it, each to their own.) There is a plot to this porn, but the problem with it is it's both brilliant and hard to follow mainly because of the distractions. If the plot was easier to follow, and less distractions through the whole 'Adult Cartoon' then perhaps it would have made it perfect. I also get we're trying to train 'dirty sluts' here, but I don't quite understand why a "Slut" should have to look up at the man they're blowing off. Really; from my perspective I find it awkward (That could just be me though) if anyone did it. Slut or not. But throughout the series one's not sure if they're berating or complimenting "Sluts" further adding to the confusion. I feel Dark Love somewhat shares what I personally believe in. Although they probably push the boundaries for me a little bit further than that. It's not often in a Hentai you see a Pregnant Woman simultaneously giving a bunch of men some sexual service, but it was nice to see. Everything about it was tolerable, and even enjoyable (Save the faults listed above) then at the end she was pissed on by all of them. Well there's another boner killer right there. I have to keep in mind that some people out there do love having a Golden Shower (Again not my thing, I do RP it though.) AND it's with (As far as we're aware) consenting adults. (Okay it's a Hentai, it's fictional. That's not what I meant.) Episode two; starts off with Rikka Koujin blowing off Tetsuya, somewhat explaining a mission involving the Magic Potion, which was somewhat touched on in the first Episode. We can deduce that this potion fuels some kind of change to tentacle monster from Human in this Episode. I think these are filled with what ever woman he's "Courrupted"'s collection of male jizz. (I've heard that before...) This potion keeps people youthful, slutty and irresistible to- I've watched this six times and honestly I have no fucking idea what's going on. It explains a few things leaves a lot open for interpretation, moving on... After the titles we're pretty much introduced to Honoka Houjou's sister, Kaori Mizuno, she's a married woman. Except we don't know that bit yet, she's in debt possibly because her business isn't doing so well and she has to pay the money back to what I would assume is either Yukuza or some kind of Non-Tentacle-Monster-Owning-Loan-Shark, there's a shocker. Honoka Houjou brings Hazuki Sogawa and Tetsuya Gojou in with her, at this point Honoka and Kaori are revealed to be sisters and Hazuki and Tetsuya are "Customers" After some whoopsie-daisy I dropped the drink and broke something we enter the closure of the scene after a quick comedy sibling-teasing bit. We seem to jump forward in time, and we come back to the Cafe/Shop thing only to find that now she has to pay by noon not days she was promised before. Tetsuya conveniently makes a re-appearance after the phone call, from what we can assume this is out of the blue. He apparently wants to help her, there's a short cut and he's sitting down, ordering a warm drink. Apparently big breasts means Titty Milk, whilst I won't pick on a hentai for this kind of logic, I will say that her not questioning this did ring as little odd, but perhaps she's desperate. Kaori returns with the milk in a sippy cup, I dread to think how much that'll set him back. When she brings it over to him we have another typical "Whoopsie-daisy" moment in which her breast milk spills all over his groin. That's some fascinating stuff. I know some people will say this Hentai is derogatory to women. I'd be happy with that statement, if on the same logic, when applying a faulty premise on a fictional cartoon that it's also derogatory to men too. I don't think I've heard Sperm and Semen reduced to dirty "Cock Juice" and said more times in any Hentai in my life. Seriously it could be turned into a drinking game. If you're one of those people (and whatever -- its your life) that finds and complains about these types of problems then perhaps Dark Love isn't for you. In fact most Hentai probably isn't either. It seems his luck didn't get the shit end of the stick as well, as within seconds she agreed to clean him all up with her mouth. How nice... Then he got a boner and you know where that's going next. Infact the first time I saw this episode I distinctly remember when I first heard about the Coffee shop saying "HURR! You know where that's going!" Well unsurprisingly it went there, and then some. After the blowjob we're left with Tetsuya telling her how she was going to pay back her debt, assumingly it involved selling them off. We also get a nice squiggly line away from her mouth from what I assume is a pube. I know I wanted realism but really? Yes. Really. As I went through the plot, I felt it was rushed when she just started handing out sexual favours so willingly, but then I don't consider myself part of the society that's around me... So I have no idea if a married woman would do this so quickly, I doubt it. Then within ten minutes she sold herself and her sister off to pay her debts. Then less than ten minutes after all this started there was a free for all, fuck and cum inside party between her and her sister with a room full of men (apparently). To which they were berated and fucked and then pissed all over again. (This time they made the mentioning of drinking it all down. What ever rocks your boat?) The sex scenes were hilarious in dialogue, animation, and content. I'm also pretty sure that this DVD should contain an Epilepsy Warning, because it just wasn't fun. As fictional (IE. Not real, as in they're not real people) storylines go, it'd probably be alot better if the dialogue was cleaned up, if I could edit Subs in the video I'd probably do it just so I could stop complaining about it. But if the scenes weren't so distracting. There's also a lot of "I'm going to Climax"... I mean repeatedly. I thought this may have been Translation issues but later it was "I'm coming" which to be honest reads better. I feel if I were wanking off to this, I'd end up like this guy... I feel this Hentai is supposed to be a boundary pusher, and that's pretty much mission accomplished. In terms of Fetishes, I feel it hits a niche market, so I have to say that's quite daring. We have Pregnancy, Impregnation, Cheating, Bondage, Golden Showers, Inserting Wiggly-Worms up the butt, Tentacle, Dominance, A little Girl on Girl and a dash of romance (I suppose, in the second episode) and it mixes them quite well. It's pretty good at combining these to make a sex scene. Not all of them appealed to me but then it wasn't made just for me. All of this I felt was let down by the extremely low-quality rapid GIF like animations for the sex scenes, the plot was hard to follow and after watching a total of six times in my life, I still have no fucking clue what's REALLY going on. It didn't help that the distractions, distracted from it. Yet you'd be hard pressed to find the fetishes the series covered so it's a tough call. I do feel there maybe capacity for a third and last episode if anything it could tie up a few things and end the story completely but perhaps leaving it on a cliff hanger was intentional. Either way this Hentai IS inspiring particularly if you're Roleplaying something similar. It definitely could have been an actual season (say containing four to six episodes) if the time was taken to properly explain the plot and to spread it out across. That's the main problem with this Hentai; it's on crack; it's just cramming everything into two 30 minute videos and I feel that is ultimately Dark Love's downfall. Perhaps with it spread like that they wouldn't have needed to make the sex scenes look rushed (not just fast but rushed too). Considering this was my favourate hentai I don't say that lightly. There are a lot of good elements in there, but then a lot of it is ruined by the faults and ultimately; this Unique Hentai could have done really well. But it's a shame. The dialogue is cheesy and lame although the story telling is pretty good, if you can keep up. Overall not the worst hentai I've ever watched... It's awkward, jutty and just simply... It's not the best hentai I've ever seen. But it's still my favourate for now, which proves you don't have to be perfect to be liked. I don't mean to sound big headed and righteous, hell I don't think I could do better personally. It's worth watching if you're into a lot of things it does and if you Roleplay and need ideas it's perhaps perfect if you're looking for that sort of thing. Of course I probably have better and worst ones with this kind of collection: Please note that this article was originally posted up on November 24th 2013; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.
  6. Game: Heavy Rain. Platform: PS3 exclusive. ArdillaVerde93's tagline: This... is... JAAAAAAAASOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!! "I love using motion controls for these Quick Time Events!" Before the game I'm gonna be talking about came out, saying that would've probably earned you a sound ass-kicking. Quick Time Events are cutscenes that require the player to perform certain button presses and/or movements in order to progress. Failure usually results in damage, or even death, to the player's character. Because of the usual suddenness of their appearance, which catches players, who put the controller down to watch what they think is a normal cutscene, off guard, they're commonly hated. So, what did developer Quantic Dream do? They made a game out of the parts of other games that people hate! That ballsy move is what brought us what turned out to be one of my favorite games. I speak, of course, of Heavy Rain. Heavy Rain is certainly an odd breed of game. As I said before, the gameplay is composed almost entirely of Quick Time Events, which can take some time to get used to. Once you've got the hang of it, though, it's quite innovative. At times, it can be a bit confusing, though, mainly during "The Bear," if you're looking for the "Kamikaze" Trophy. Not to mention, it'll twist your fingers into pretzels, mainly during "The Butterfly." If it becomes problematic, though, you can change the difficulty, so it's a non-issue. So, that's the controls out of the way. Heavy Rain stars 4 otherwise unconnected people, on the hunt for a killer, who, save for their alias, is unknown. The killer is simply known as "the Origami Killer," due to their victims being found with an origami figure. Each of the 4 characters has a storyline, and their own reasons for wanting to find this killer. Ethan Mars is an architect whose son was taken by the Origami Killer. Madison Paige is a journalist in search of the truth. Norman Jayden is an FBI agent who was assigned to the case. Finally, Scott Shelby is a private investigator who works with the families of the killer's victims. 4 characters doesn't mean 4 separate playthroughs, though; you play as all 4 at different points throughout the game. That doesn't mean that every playthrough is the same, though; not by a long shot. Throughout the game, you are faced with options. Your decisions actually have an impact on the game. Examples include... *Do you kill that man, or pistol whip him into unconsciousness and pretend you did? *Do you try reasoning with a religious maniac who thinks your friend is the son of Satan, or shoot him? Even the way you talk to people can make a difference in this game. It's that kind of innovation that immerses you in the game. Rather than feeling like you're playing a game, you feel like you're actually a part of it! Every choice you make could be the difference between life and death, sometimes literally. I can't explain too much of the storyline without spoilers, so I'll talk about the other aspects of the game. You probably know this already, but PS3 games are on Blu-Ray discs(which justified the PS3's ridiculously high price of around $500 at release, as Blu-Ray was, at the time, a new, and expensive, technology. For anyone who wants to know, mine, which I got a couple of years ago for Christmas, cost $120, but that was a Black Friday deal.), so they can hold inordinate amounts of data. Later games, such as Tekken Tag Tournament 2, and even some early games, like LittleBigPlanet, show that off quite well. Lush, striking graphics, immersive sound, and a wealth of content are all fairly commonplace on the polished black powerhouse. As for Heavy Rain? Well, you can certainly tell it's a next-gen game. The graphics are nice for an early PS3 game, and the soundtrack is absolutely breathtaking, and chilling at times. As far as content goes, there are several different endings to reward players for choosing different options, but, other than that, you pretty much just get the equivalent of DVD bonus features(concept art, making of, and trailers.). There's no postgame, unfortunately, but there's not really a need for one, since, no matter what ending you get, everything is wrapped up pretty nicely, story-wise. That's also why there's no sequel. A movie was in the works, but, as far as I know, it was scrapped. Basically, despite its innovations, Heavy Rain isn't flawless. You have to admit, though, making "Quick Time Event: The Game" was a risky move that, ironically, paid off pretty well. Even riskier was allowing the PlayStation Move controller(a set of 2 specialized motion controllers, used alongside a USB camera.) to be used, which, by the way, is a perfectly viable option. There were only a couple of times(such as the flashback level with young Scott, for example.) when I thought "this isn't working; if I wanna do this right, I'll have to switch to my DualShock 3(the standard controller that came with my system.)." Taking risks isn't something you see too often in this age of Call Of Duty and Grand Theft Auto, but Heavy Rain pulled it off with aplomb. By the way, I realize I'm a hypocrite for calling out COD and GTA for being repetitive, considering I'm obsessed with Pokémon, and I just spent a good portion of last night immersed in Saints Row: The Third. It's still a valid argument, though. Anyway, I'm quickly running out things to say here, so let's get to my rating. I give Heavy Rain 4 out of 5. It's full of thrills and suspense to keep you going until you get all of the endings, but, unless you're going for Trophies, the thrills don't last long. Oh, and, by the way, my tagline for this review is based on a meme involving one of the first levels of the game. Look up "Heavy Rain Jason," or "Press X To Jason," and you'll see what I mean. Memes aside, Heavy Rain is proof that you don't have to join the crowd to make a good game. I apologize for throwing around the word "innovative," but, other than "awesome," that's one of the best words to use to describe Heavy Rain. If you have a PS3, give serious consideration to this game. Get the Director's Cut version, if you can find it; it's not too expensive, to my knowledge, and it comes with a voucher for the soundtrack, and another one for DLC.
  7. Well, I'm not sure if this is gonna be okay or not, but this is gonna be a thread where I review many hentai doujins. I read a lot of different doujins, and because most of them are short I feel it would be strange splitting them into a bunch of different topics. If this isn't okay, I'm sorry and I won't continue this. ------------- How these reviews work: I'm gonna split the review into 5 sections. Info, Overview, Story, Art and Final Thoughts. Hopefully these will help anyone out there find some good fap material! ------------- Uiuishii Imouto | Naive Little Sister Artist: Fukumaaya Length: 20 Pages Genres: Incest (Sister/Brother) Onahole Prostitution Chubby Shark Teeth (explained later) Large Breasts Overview: An Otaku sister asks her older brother for money to buy herself a new hugging pillow, after giving her so much money he needs to get a little something back. Story: Sadly this is only a 20 page story, it is still pretty enjoyable. It is a simple story, the sister is an otaku, wants a new hugging pillow, and asks her brother for money. As a joke he tosses her his personal onahole and tells her to jerk him off. Being desperate she does it anyway, as he is about to cum he tells her to use her mouth and forces her head on it, shooting it in her mouth. When the sister trys to collect the brother refuses and claims he would forget all his past debts if she lets him go all the way. She agrees, and so they do arguing a bit during, but finally he finishes inside her and does what he agress. The story ends with the sister entering the brothers room and he asks if she ordered the pillow. She says that after the day before she would rather have sex again than the pillow. So the story is rather cute, although a bit plain and done before. The main draw besides the art is the way the sister acts. At times she is really playful, arguing or even getting mad at her brother for lusting after her even though she goes along with everything he says. At the same time she gets very shy and cute, almost the opposite of what she was before. The ending is especially cute, and for how short the story was it was an enjoyable read. Art: This is the main drawing point of this doujin. I love how cute the girl looks, and I am sad that this artist doesn't have more work out there. The brother is kind of plain, but the sister is a little chubby, but very curvy in all the right places. She has a cute shyness about the way she acts, although she still knows what she is doing. The faces are all very well done, showing some strange emotion. The faces can get a little goofy at times, but still lustful when they need to be, and cute other times. One thing to mention though, the artist gave the sister a set of shark teeth. Now although those look very threatening, it doesn't actually play any kind of role in the story. They are never mentioned even when she has her mouth around his dick. It has a very strangely cute appeal for me though, I'm not sure what it is about this set of teeth, but it gives a little something extra. I guess if one fang is moe, a full set is extra moe. Besides that the sex scenes are very well done, the sister is very fleshy. Whenever there is grabbing the brothers hands sink in slightly, and her face during the whole act is rather adorable. The sex only lasts a couple of pages, but the banter back and forth and the changes in personality really make it something special, even though it is very plain (besides the fact it is incest). Final Thoughts: A very short but sweet doujin, that I have read quite a few times now, I do really enjoy this artists work and I would suggest it to anyone. Verdict: GIVE IT A READ ------------- So that is my first review, hopefully next time it'll be something longer or a little less vanilla, but this was a fun experiment for me.
  8. Name: Pokémon: The Movie 2000 and Pikachu's Rescue Adventure. Other names: The Power Of One, Mirage Pokémon: Lugia's Explosive Birth, Revelation - Lugia, The Pikachu Expedition. Featured Pokémon: Articuno, Zapdos, Moltres, Lugia. Generation: 1.5(no games.). Anime season: 2(Orange Island.). Opening theme: Pokémon World. Ending theme: The Power Of One by Donna Summer, Polkamon by Weird Al Yankovic, and Flying Without Wings by Westlife. ArdillaVerde93's tagline: Thus, the earth shall turn to Bob. *SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT A TEST!! AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE WILL FOLLOW!! XD* Hi, everyone! Welcome to Gotta Review 'Em All part 2, where I'll be talking about the second Pokémon movie: The Power Of One! Now, before I go much further, let me explain something. I refer to the Orange Island series as Generation 1.5 because there are no games for it, and because it takes place between the original series and The Johto Journeys(Season 3.). As such, Generation II Pokemon made fairly frequent occurrences. By the way, being a Pokémon fanatic myself, I know that Nintendo would make a lot of people happy if they released a Pokémon game in which the player could go to the Orange Islands, since, aside from the fan-made game "Pokémon Naranja," that hasn't been possible. But I digress. Alright, fair warning; I hope you like Donna Summer, because you'll hear a lot of her. Well, not her, but one of her songs. In fact, I'll be counting the number of times part of the song is played! Alright; let's do this! Without further ado, here's a synopsis, and review, of Pokémon: The Movie 2000, AKA The Power Of One! The movie starts with a nice view of the ocean. 3 islands are visible in the distance. *Power Of One count: 1(Background music.).* The "camera" pulls back, showing another "island." I use quotation marks there because it looks more like a shrine than an island, but whatever. More pretty scenery is shown, as is a Generation II Pokémon: Slowking. Then, just like in the first movie, we're treated to a disembodied voice. This one, however, recites a prophecy. "Disturb not the harmony of fire, ice, or lightning, lest these Titans wreak destruction upon the world in which they clash. Though the water's great guardian shall arise to quell the fighting, alone, its song will fail; thus, the Earth shall turn to ash. Oh, Chosen One, into thine hands bring together all 3. Their treasures combined tame the beast of the sea." We're treated to a view of the inside of some sort of flying fortress(because fuck logic; this is Pokémon!), and we now see that the voice wasn't disembodied; it belongs to a dapper-looking man. His name is Lawrence III, but you're not supposed to know that yet, so this'll be our little secret; got it? Anyway, he had been talking to himself, apparently, but a sudden beeping noise from behind him makes him turn around. Apparently, technology in the Pokémon world was advanced, even back then; Siri starts talking to him. She informs him that she has deciphered the prophecy and concluded that the Titans it refers to are Moltres(fire.), Articuno(ice.), and Zapdos(lightning.). They're very rare Pokemon, only found in Shamouti Island(according to the movie, at least; anybody who's actually played Pokémon knows that's bullshit.). Lawrence asks Siri which one of the birds is closest, and she tells him that Moltres is. As such, he sets his sights on it first. It doesn't take him too long to find Moltres, and about the same amount of time to capture it within a forcefield generated by metal rings. Lawrence remarks how easy the capture was, and that, once he has Zapdos and Articuno, he'll find his true prize. Viewers are then treated to a scene that should be familiar to anyone who's played Pokémon Silver; Lugia swimming through the ocean. *Power Of One count: 2(Lugia vocalizes it.).* Another epic title sequence shows us the movie's alternate name: The Power Of One. *Power Of One count: 3(a short, rock version is played during the title sequence.).* With that out of the way, and now that the viewers know what they're watching, it cuts to a boat in the middle of the ocean, while the narrator points out what a beautiful day it is. We see that the main characters, including the captain, Maren, are on the boat. In particular, Pikachu is perched on a thin ledge, scowling. I guess, since he's an Electric type, they're using him to check for storms. That's actually pretty clever and funny at the same time. So, as an excuse to show off their current teams, our heroes decide to let their Pokémon out to enjoy the beautiful day. We're treated to scenes of them playing around, set to a remix of the Season 2 theme song, "Pokemon World." Soon after that, the storm that I'm guessing they had Pikachu on the lookout for hits. The trainers recall their Pokémon, except for Ash's Pikachu, Misty's Togepi, and Tracey's Marill. Pikachu is left hanging onto the barrier on the bow of the boat. *Power Of One count: 5(Lugia vocalizes it, then it's played as background music.).* The storm, which disappeared as soon as it started, has nevertheless thrown our heroes off course; they're now headed toward Shamouti Island. The storm has also thrown Team Rocket around in their Mecha-Magikarp. One fourth wall break("An island!" "In a storm!" "I've seen this movie!"), and one McDonalds reference("We're about to be..." "Filet 'O Fish?"), later, they crash into a rock. We are now shown what's going on back in Ash's hometown of Pallet Town. Ash's mom(whose name is first revealed in this movie to be "Delia.") is tending to her garden, while her Mr. Mime sweeps up. Professor Oak shows up to check on things, and he likes what he sees. He and Delia both comment on the nice weather, but, as if on cue, the weather turns nasty. It rains, then starts snowing. The viewers are treated to a beautiful aurora as a flock of Pidgey takes to the sky. All at once, the sky clears up. Oak(after almost being carried away by a huge group of Diglett.) points out that Pokémon are more in tune with nature than humans are, and the fact that the Pokémon are acting strange is a very bad sign. We see that our heroes have made it, more or less unharmed, to Shamouti Island. Unfortunately, they're ambushed by a group of people dressed in bird costumes. Our heroes find out that Shamouti Island is currently host to a festival, and that a young girl named Melody is going to be the festival maiden. As for the role of the Chosen One, guess who takes that. You won't figure it out, but guess! It's Ash! Shocker; I know. Melody overhears that Ash is the Chosen One, and she gives him a "traditional welcome kiss." That pisses off Misty, which gets Melody's attention. She guesses that Misty is Ash's sister, and, after Misty refutes that claim, she guesses that she's Ash's girlfriend. Misty shoots down that possibility, as well, but Melody is intent on pissing her off even more. She says that there is a banquet that she'll be performing at, then tells Misty(calling her by name, even though Ash's friends hadn't introduced themselves yet.) not to get jealous. Ash and his friends are led up some stairs, while surprisingly ominous music plays. Pikachu doesn't look too happy, but that's nothing out of the ordinary; he barely smiles at all throughout the entire movie. Anyway, the next minute or so that follows shows a big festival being held. After that, though, the festival isn't mentioned again, and we cut to the aforementioned banquet, and get to hear the end of what I'm sure was an adult joke("...and she says 'no, but I have Krabbys!'"). Misty is still mad at Melody, and takes her anger out on a piece of fried chicken. Ash, however, is more interested in what being "the Chosen One" entails. *Power Of One count: 6(Melody plays it on her weird instrument.).* Suddenly, all eyes are on Melody, as she plays a song while doing a weird jerky dance. She runs up to Ash and recites what I assume is another part of the prophecy from before. "From the trio of islands, ancient spheres shall you take, for, between life and death, all the difference you'll make. O, Chosen One, you must climb to the shrine to make right what is wrong, and the world will be healed by the guardian's song!" Ash doesn't quite understand, so Melody(using nearby fruit as props.) puts it in layman's terms for him. *Power Of One count: 7(Melody plays it for a second or 2.).* Now that Ash understands what he has to do, he wants to do it right away. Melody says he should stay for the party, but he's having none of it. Maren admires his enthusiasm, and offers to take him to the islands in her boat. Ash invites Misty, but she angrily declines. Then, completely unprovoked, Pikachu decides to be a dick and take Ash's treasured hat. Apparently, they made it to the boat, though, because the very next scene involves Team Rocket almost getting run over by it. Then, suddenly, it starts pouring rain again. We cut to the Slowking from earlier, reciting part of the "disturb not the harmony" part of the prophecy, before pointing out the sorry state of things, with a voice that wouldn't be out of place in an Emergency Alert System message. For those of you in the UK, who don't know what the Emergency Alert System is, I envy you. Slowking's voice in this part, and Lugia's speaking voice later, creep me out for reasons you luckily don't understand. Back at the banquet, Melody decides that she's going to go after Ash, considering he's caught in the storm because of what Melody thinks is just a silly legend to entertain tourists. Misty and Tracey tag along, resulting in another back and forth between Melody and Misty, which, apparently, distracts them well enough for Team Rocket to stow away on their boat undetected. Meanwhile, Lawrence III, in his floating fortress, points out a disturbance in the force, so to speak. Siri tells him that Zapdos is nearby, so he sets off in search of it. Now, we're shown a weather report that's being viewed by people on the island, as well as back in Pallet Town. The odd weather, though centered in the Orange Islands, is global. It seems to be caused by an underwater river. Delia, knowing that Ash is in the Orange Islands, is understandably worried. Then, we get to see another example of Pokémon technology; Professor Oak gets a call on Skype. The call is from Professor Philena Ivy, a character exclusive to the Orange Islands arc. She confirms what Oak had already told Delia much earlier; the Pokémon are acting strange. We see a cameo appearance by Brock, as he runs back and forth, carrying Pokémon. Back on the boat, the storm is over for now, but that doesn't stop the waves from being treacherous. This results in the boat breaking it's rudder off on a rock, then getting washed ashore. At least the island they're stranded on is the one they were looking for. Pikachu runs off, because he's a dick, and Ash follows him. Meanwhile, Melody is in hot pursuit of Ash, and she shows off some impressive boating skills. She assures Misty and Tracey that they don't need to worry, since she grew up around boats. Misty points out that she wasn't scared, anyway, since she's a Water type Gym Leader. Suddenly, the boat almost gets swallowed up by a huge wave. They avoid that, just in time for another huge wave to throw the boat into the air, and send Team Rocket flying. We see the interior of Maren's boat as Maren is about to have some coffee. Unfortunately, another wave crashes into the boat, causing Maren to spill the coffee. That's gotta hurt! Melody's boat has landed on a giant rock, but everyone seems to be okay, although Maren's boat is wrecked. Suddenly, though, Melody's boat starts falling. Melody, however, reveals the sail of the boat and uses it to make the boat fly, taking advantage of the strong wind. Another back and forth between Melody and Misty later, and we get to see Lawrence III again. He pretends to feel sorry for Moltres, since it's all alone, but, when Siri tells him that Zapdos is near Fire Island, it becomes clear that Moltres won't be lonely for long. Meanwhile, Pikachu has led Ash to the first of the 3 shrines he has to go to to get the spheres. Ash grabs the fire sphere, but has a fourth-wall breaking run-in with Team Rocket("...and make it double; we're on the big screen!" "I'll have to catch this on video!"). And cue the Deus Ex Machina; Melody's "flying" boat shows up and almost crushes them. Melody scolds Ash for not staying at the party, but, when Misty butts in, Melody decides to piss her off by assuming she and Ash will get married. Team Rocket warns Misty about the dangers of romance just in time for Zapdos to come flying in and put on a kickass light show. Pikachu sees this giant bird of death, and decides to do the only rational thing: attack it! Or, at least, that's what it looks like. Meowth points out that Pikachu is actually trying to talk to Zapdos through those shocks, and even translates what Pikachu's saying; he wants to know why Zapdos is on Fire Island, and what happened to Moltres. Zapdos shocks him back, which Meowth also translates. Zapdos is taking Fire Island for itself, now that Moltres is gone. With that, Zapdos goes apeshit and tries to shock everyone, but the electricity gets drawn upward by an unseen force. Well, unseen until it floats into view. *Power Of One count: 8(background music.).* Lawrence III is sucking up Zapdos' electricity with his fortress, which weakens it enough for him to capture it with the same method he used for Moltres. This time, though, he accidentally, and unknowingly, captures Melody's boat, and everyone on it, as well! Lawrence III remarks that all he needs now is Articuno. Then, we see another Pokémon Silver-esque scene. *Power Of One count: 10(Lugia vocalizes it, then it's played as background music.).* Lawrence III is alerted by Siri that the fortress picked up something extra when they were capturing Zapdos, so he goes to check on things. The chair he's sitting on happens to be on a platform that can rise and fall, so he reaches the holding area right after Melody reads the first part of the prophecy from earlier. He brags about his collection, which causes Misty to tell him off, calling him a bad trainer. Lawrence III, however, corrects her, saying he's just a collector. Apparently, he started with a Mew card. Just then, Siri tells him that Articuno is changing course, so he leaves to go after it. And now, we get to see the lovely Articuno screwing around, before the movie cuts to another news report. This time, the news crew is flying in a helicopter, and they brought Oak, Ivy, and, for some reason, Delia, with them. Pokémon everywhere are trying to get to the Orange Islands, to try to stop whatever's going on. Oak explains that disturbances in the islands of fire, ice, and lightning are responsible for the crazy weather. Then, Ivy explains that the Pokémon are flocking to the islands because they want to correct the disturbances. Delia just wants to see Ash again. Then, we see Slowking, sad because he doesn't have pants. Um,... Alright? Well, the blizzard ends as soon as it began, but we get to see more Articuno action, so that's cool. Back in the fortress, Melody rereads the same part of the prophecy she read before. James worries that he'll die, but Meowth assures him that he'll be fine, since only intelligent life will be destroyed. First thing's first, though; Moltres and Zapdos have to be freed. Meanwhile, Lawrence III has his eyes on Articuno, and shows his desire for it by firing missiles at it! If he's a collector, shouldn't he be trying to capture the Pokémon he's collecting without hurting them, so they're more valuable? I still have my Fluttershy figure, and my posters(1 of which is an authentic Japanese movie poster for this movie.) from Comic-Con, in their box/bag. The less you handle them, the more they're worth. Anyway, it doesn't really matter, since Articuno dodges the missiles. We're treated with another quick Pokémon Silver-esque scene. *Power Of One count: 11(background music. You have to listen carefully to hear it.).* Back in the fortress, our heroes, and Team Rocket, try to free the birds by attacking the cages they're in. It doesn't work at first, but, when 4 Pokemon attack together, they break Moltres' cage. Moltres single-handedly breaks Zapdos' with Flamethrower, allowing them both to escape. Not exactly grateful, they both fly around, attacking each other, and they nearly destroy the fortress in the process. The damage they cause forces the fortress to crash land on Lightning Island. Everyone seems to be alright, but the shrine nearby is destroyed, causing the Lightning sphere to roll right up to Ash. While our heroes, and Team Rocket, manage to get in Melody's boat, the birds keep on fighting, punctuated by a brief scene of an underwater tornado. Their fighting actually breaks part of the island, causing the boat, and everyone on it, to get swept away by a strong current. They prepare for a nasty fall, only to be saved by a waterspout. *Power Of One count: 12(Lugia vocalizes it.).* Team Rocket takes what I assume is the only life raft, but it doesn't really matter; soon, the boat ends up at another island. This one appears to be populated by the Slowking, who tells Ash to put the treasures in the 3 slots up ahead. Ash obeys, but soon finds that he's missing a sphere; the Ice sphere. The birds are still fighting, so Ash runs up and tells them to stop. It, of course, doesn't work, but their fighting is interrupted anyway by the waterspout from before, which dissipates to reveal Lugia. Everyone gawks at it, and rightfully so, considering it's a Generation II Legendary Pokémon. *Power Of One count: 13(Lugia vocalizes it.).* Lugia's singing is familiar to Melody; she pulls out her ocarina-looking thing from the banquet, and realizes that the song she played on it was actually Lugia's song. Meanwhile, Lawrence III, surprisingly unharmed, now has Lugia in his sights! The fighting continues, but Lugia is participating now, too, which makes for an epic battle. After a while, Melody recites the "water's great guardian" part of the prophecy, and Slowking points out the obvious("This looks bad!"). More fighting! Lugia puts up a good fight, but he can't keep up with 3 enemies at once, and gets shot out of the sky. *Power Of One count: 14(background music.).* With Lugia out of the way, the other 3 birds keep fighting, while Ash and the others look on in horror. The news crew helicopter flies in, and we see that Delia needs to rethink her priorities; she's more worried about Ash than she is about the fate of the world. Suddenly, the Pokémon that were trying to reach the islands finally arrive. Everyone realizes that Ash is the actual Chosen One, but Ash isn't too keen on the idea of saving the world, even wishing his name was "Bob," so the prophecy wouldn't mention him. Melody remembers the similarity between her song and Lugia's song, so... *Power Of One count: 15(Melody plays it.).* Somehow, the song heals Lugia, so he chooses to talk directly to our heroes, and Team Rocket, in one of the creepiest, and most surprising, voices I've ever heard. He explains that, in order to stop the fighting, the 3 spheres have to be put in the slots, but that only Ash can do it, because he's the only one who can make the spheres glow. He says that Ash doesn't have to do it if he doesn't want to, and Ash is, understandably, hesitant. But, then, a miracle happens. Pikachu smiles! He gives him an unintelligible pep talk, along with Ash's other Pokémon, who emerge from their Pokéballs. Moved by the pep talk, Ash decides to finish the quest. This admittedly powerful moment is cut short in the very next scene, in which Ash makes a joke while trudging through the snow("Right now, I feel more like The Frozen One!"). After face-planting, Ash wonders if the prophecy was wrong. When Pikachu points out a wrecked boat nearby, though, Ash gets an idea. We cut to his Pokémon towing the wreckage, with Ash on it, at breakneck speed, while Lugia follows closely. Back with the others, Team Rocket laments that they're unimportant. Meowth says that they could be heroes if they were given a chance. Well, they get their chance; the news helicopter crashes(luckily not hurting anyone.) right next to them, which gives them an idea. Back to Ash, his Pokémon, and Lugia again, they get attack by the other birds, but do a good job of fighting them off, at least until the birds destroy the "boat." Just as all hope seems lost, Ash is rescued by Team Rocket, of all people, who appear to have used some of the helicopter parts, along with the life raft from before, to make a motorboat. They soon reveal that their motives aren't exactly pure, though; there wouldn't be anyone left to rob if the world were to be destroyed. They get attacked again, but Lugia fights the attackers off. After going through a long tunnel(on a makeshift motorboat, no less.), they arrive at the shrine, where Ash takes the Ice sphere. They try to escape, but get stopped by the birds; Lugia can't save them this time. In fact, their boat is destroyed. Then, Articuno is felled when the other 2 birds gang up on it. Ash and Team Rocket manage to escape, and Ash shows Lugia the Ice sphere. *Power Of One count: 16(background music.).* Lugia allows Ash(and, accidentally, Team Rocket, who grab his tail.) to ride on him back to the island where Ash has to take the spheres. Unfortunately, Lugia gets attacked by the other birds(sans Articuno.), and, with Team Rocket holding onto his tail, he can't dodge as well as he could before. After a totally random Weight Watchers reference("We should try Weight Watchers!" "It's too late for that!" "I heard it's never too late if you really stick to the program!"), Team Rocket lets go, sacrificing themselves for the greater good. However, they survive the fall, plunging underwater and surfacing near a huge group of Pokémon. Lugia explains to Ash that the Pokémon have gathered because they want to help, but that Ash is the only one who can fix what's happening. *Power Of One count: 17(background music.).* Melody and Misty start worrying, but it's not needed, because Ash waves at them. Suddenly, though, Lawrence III's capture rings(that's what I'm calling them.) shoot from the fortress, straight towards Lugia. *Power Of One count: 18(background music; you have to listen carefully.).* The capture rings surround Ash, Pikachu, and Lugia. Lugia won't go down without a fight, though. He fires 2 Hyper Beams, the first of which destroys the fortress. Unfortunately, Lugia has used the last of his energy; he plunges into the icy sea, defeated, taking Ash and Pikachu down with him. Ash and Pikachu surface, but Ash is unconscious. Lugia admits his failure. Even the Pokémon that traveled all that way know things are grim. Melody tries to give her ocarina thing to Misty, but she won't take it. Instead, she sets out to find Ash, which doesn't take her very long at all. Once she finds him, she brings him back to the island where, rather than give him CPR, she shakes him! Somehow, it works, but - and this is coming from someone with quite a bit of medical knowledge - I wouldn't recommend it. Not just because it's stupid, but because, if the victim has a head, neck, or back injury, you're likely to make it worse. Anyway, Ash shambles over and puts the Ice sphere in the last slot. This makes pretty lights come out of all 3 spheres. It also causes shining green water(ew.) to pour out into markings on the ground, and it causes the stone pillars around everyone to crystallize. Melody wastes no time in playing her song. By the way, we have just reached the climax of the movie. *Power Of One count: 21(Melody plays it, then background music takes over, then Melody finishes it.).* Articuno, Zapdos, and Moltres, tamed by the song, fly around happily. That finally brings an end to the crazy weather that plagued the world. Grateful, Lugia emerges, his power restored by the song, and offers Ash and Pikachu a ride. With the song finished, Melody drops to her knees. Some islanders look outside, stunned, and a news report tells us what we already know; the bad weather is over. Back with the main characters, Lugia congratulates Ash, saying that the fate of the world couldn't have been in better hands. With that, he returns to the sea, and, unfortunately for Ash, his mother and Professor Oak catch up to them. Delia's first instinct is to bitch Ash out, but, then, she admits that she worries about him all the time. Ash placates her by saying that he'll try to stay close to home(LIAR!!). Oak runs off, excited to tell other researchers about the recent events. Then, we cut to Lawrence III, picking up his Mew card out of the wreckage of his fortress. He hasn't given up his hobby, and he's going to start over with the card that started it all. The final pre-credits scene is of Team Rocket, happy that they did they did the right thing, but sad that nobody saw them do it. Slowking breaks the fourth wall by telling them that lots of people saw it, and that they're still watching. With that knowledge, Team Rocket ends the movie by talking about starting their own team. *Power Of One count: 22(it plays during the credits, complete with vocals.).* And, with that, we've reached the credits! Like they are in a lot of the Pokémon movies, the credits in this one aren't too special, serving mostly as a way to get extra songs in at the last minute. Donna Summer is good, but, by the time you've reached the credits, you're probably sick of the song she contributed, and the addition of vocals probably won't do too much to change that. The fact that they got Weird Al Yankovic to do a song is cool, but it seems out of place, considering the song that precedes it, and the song that comes after it, are both ballads. Not exactly what Weird Al Yankovic is known for. As for the final song, Flying Without Wings, it's amazing, and I wish they had played more of it. And that's it for The Power Of One! A good movie that could've used song variety. In case you lost count, they used the same song 22 times! I'll talk more about it later, but, for now, let's move on to Pikachu's Rescue Adventure, the mini-movie that comes with it. It starts with Ash, Misty, and Tracey deciding to take a break, so they let their Pokémon do the same. Unfortunately, Togepi apparently has ADHD, because it goes running after a swarm of Ledyba while the other Pokémon are asleep. Togepi loses its balance and tumbles down a hill, waking up the other Pokémon in the process. Further down the the hill, Togepi smacks into Meowth, who was just walking around. This sends them both tumbling until they fall down a hole. The other Pokémon reach the hole, and seem to be wondering what to do. Well, Psyduck, bringing up the rear, answers that for them, running into them and sending them all down the hole. While they fall, and for a little while afterwards, the viewers are treated to a song. Coming To The Rescue by O-Town. It's a generic boy band sort of song, but it's still pretty good. A swarm of Ledyba, presumably the same one from before, drops our heroes(using that term loosely.) off at a big tree. An Elekid shows up, and Squirtle dons his Squirtle Squad sunglasses, trying to intimidate it. Pikachu steps in and stops him, though, instead opting to do what I assume is an Electric type equivalent of a secret handshake. Luckily, It works. Suddenly, a whole bunch of Pokémon pop up to greet the newcomers. After a short scene in which we see that Meowth is hanging from a branch overlooking a river, Pikachu explains to Elekid that they're looking for Togepi. It just so happens that Elekid knows where Togepi is, and he's willing to take the main characters there. We see more Pokémon, and, when the journey involves crossing a large vine, we see that, despite acting tough earlier, Squirtle is a pussy. Can't say I'd be too different. Anyway, Elekid takes them to an Exeggcute nest. Lo and behold, there's Togepi! Unfortunately, the Exeggcute won't let Togepi go, because they think it's one of them. Exeggcute live in groups of 6, but this one only has 5; one of them is missing. We see some more Pokémon as the main characters end up in a beautiful meadow. I assume that Elekid led them there. As it turns out, they're just in time for a show! 3 Bellossom pop out of the ground and start dancing. They're soon joined by more and more Pokémon, until it's like a dance crew(or troupe, if you prefer.)! Suddenly, Pikachu hears something, so he runs off to see what it is. He leads the other main characters into a cave, where they find a bunch of Clefairy. Pikachu realizes too late that they're using Metronome(picks a random attack and uses it.), which ends up turning into Explosion, sending the main characters flying into a tree with VERY springy leaves. In fact, it looks like there are actual springs attaching the leaves to the tree! Everyone has fun bouncing around, but, unfortunately, Pikachu and Elekid bounce too high, and land on Meowth, still hanging from the branch. They get flung off of the branch, and land on a Snorlax, who launches them into the river. They surface riding up the waterfall on a Gyarados. Meowth tries to kick Pikachu off of it, which doesn't end well. Pikachu uses Thundershock, causing the Gyarados to buck all 3 of them off. Pikachu and Elekid land back in the tree, but Meowth blasts off in classic Team Rocket style. As soon as Meowth disappears, the weather turns bad. Everyone hides at first, but, when they realize that the Exeggcute nests are in danger, it becomes a mad dash to protect them. The wind is ridiculously strong, but Snorlax seems to be able to take it, so he stands over the others to protect them. After a little while, though, Pikachu realizes that everyone is in serious danger, so he runs up to the top of the tree for one of the most badass scenes in all of Pokémon. Pikachu, later joined by Elekid, Thundershocks the lightning to keep it away from the tree! I shit you not! It actually works, for a little while. Eventually, a bolt of lightning slips past them, starting a fire. Marill and Squirtle quickly use Water Gun to put it out, though. With the fire out, the problem once again becomes protecting the Exeggcute. The same strategy as before(using Snorlax.) works for a while, until he lets go of the chain of Pokémon to try to grab some fruit that's blowing by, sending them flying and forcing Pikachu to grab onto a bump on the branch WITH HIS TEETH!! Coming from someone who has 2 broken teeth, I can't watch that without cringing. Just as Pikachu loses his grip, it's Snorlax to the rescue again! Snorlax pulls the Pokémon, and the Exeggcute nest with Togepi in it, back down to safety. With that done, the weather miraculously goes back to normal, and we see a beautiful Dragonair flying around. There's just one last problem. The missing Exeggcute still hasn't been found. However, a random Chansey comes dancing in to solve that problem; the Exeggcute was in her pouch the whole time! The Exeggcute bounce around happily, now that they're all together. It turns out, though, that they're bouncing around near a Leaf Stone, which causes it to evolve into an Exeggutor, and start dancing. We cut to a cliff near a cave, where the main characters say their goodbyes to their new friends. Then, we see that Meowth is, more or less, alright. He landed in a river, which dumped him into a lake. He says he doesn't wanna go to camp anymore(he does, anyway, but not for 3 more mini-movies.). Finally, we rejoin the trainers, just as they wake up. They wonder where their Pokémon are, but they soon find out that their Pokémon are safe and sound, playing in a lake(likely a different one than Meowth ended up in.). Tracey remarks that they must have been playing the whole time. The Pokémon end the mini-movie by jumping out of the water, which is shown as a still frame that fades into what looks like a drawing of the same scene. And that's Pikachu's Rescue Adventure! In contrast to the movie it's shown alongside, it's much more light-hearted and cute, which are important qualities for those things. Now, I suppose you'd like to know my thoughts on this movie. Well, I'm not one to disappoint! Here we go! Well, like I said at the beginning, I hope you like Donna Summer, or, at least, like hearing the same song over and over. This movie likes to beat that song into your head.It also likes to do the same thing with the prophecy. Not to mention that Pikachu is a total sourpuss; he only smiles twice throughout the entire movie! With that said, though, do I think that this is a good movie? Yes, I do. The Power Of One boasts a fairly deep story, epic fights, and a star-studded soundtrack. In fact, to my knowledge, it was the last Pokémon movie to have a soundtrack that didn't consist completely, or mostly, of songs from the actual movie. That being said, though, 22 times is a bit much to play one song. Maybe, they were trying to brag about the fact that they got Donna Summer for the soundtrack. The first movie had songs by Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, The Spice Girls, Aaron Carter, and a few others, though, so that probably isn't the reason. Oh, well. Like the first movie, this one is hard to find. I got my copy from my cousin for my 20th birthday. If you can find it for a good price, I'd recommend picking it up. It's a bit of a slog at almost 2 hours long, but there's enough to keep the viewer occupied. All in all, a fitting send-off for Generation 1.5. That's right; I said "send-off." Generation 1.5 didn't end with this movie; it ended after Ash competed in the Orange League. This was, however, the final movie before Generation II. Before I leave you, I should mention that this movie is popular with Pokéshippers. Pokéshippers are people who depict Ash and Misty in a relationship in fanart and fanfiction. However much Misty tries to hide it, it's clear she has feelings for Ash. I'm not saying they should be a couple, but there's clearly something there. Well, that's it for my synopsis and review of The Power Of One and Pikachu's Rescue Adventure! Join me next time when I enter familiar, and beloved, territory by reviewing my favorite Pokémon movie; Spell Of The Unown, the first movie from my favorite Generation of Pokémon: Generation II! Will the movie starring Pokémon that look like letters spell victory over the last 2 movies? Find out next time! ArdillaVerde93, signing off! Gotta Catch 'Em All!
  9. Name: Pokémon: The First Movie and Pikachu's Vacation. Other names: Mewtwo Strikes Back, Mewtwo's Counterattack, and Pikachu's Summer Vacation. Featured Pokémon: Mewtwo and Mew. Generation: I(Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, and, technically, FireRed and LeafGreen.). Anime season: 1(Indigo League.). Availability: VHS, LaserDisc, DVD(by itself, or as a part of Pokemon: The First Three Movies.). Key quotes: "Maybe, if we start looking at what's the same, instead of what's different,... well, who knows?" "I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." ArdillaVerde93's tagline: Personally, I prefer Action Replay. *SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT A TEST!! AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE WILL FOLLOW!! XD* Welcome to my first anime review! I decided to start with Pokémon: The First Movie. Now, let me get a few things out of the way. In case you didn't know, Ash dies. That is a thing that happens in this movie. I understand that it's easily one of the most iconic moments in Pokémon history, and I'll certainly get to it, but not until it's time. Also, this movie was quite different in Japan. Let me explain. The Japanese version begins with an explanation of Mewtwo's origin. Dr. Fuji(possibly related to Mr. Fuji from Pokémon Red, Blue, Green, Yellow, FireRed, LeafGreen, and, debatably, Emerald.) desperately wants to clone his daughter, Amber, who died. Giovanni, the leader of Team Rocket, agrees to fund his research, on one condition; he wants a clone of the Legendary Pokémon, Mew, which is thought to be extinct. Fuji agrees and travels to Guyana(a real place, by the way, in South America. Look it up.), in hopes of finding Mew DNA with which to make the clone. He lucks out, finding - I shit you not - fossilized eyelashes! I'm no archeologist, but I don't think that's possible. He, along with a team of scientists, is able to successfully clone Mew, as well as Amber, naming the clones Mewtwo and Ambertwo, respectively. Mewtwo and Ambertwo talk to each other via telepathy, and spark something resembling a friendship. Unfortunately, the friendship doesn't last long; Ambertwo fades away, the result of her being an imperfect clone. Mewtwo is distraught, but the scientists drug him, determined not to allow the brain wave spike caused by his outburst to result in him failing, as well. From there, the movie starts. "Life; the great miracle, and the great mystery." That's how English-speaking audiences were introduced to this movie. The line is spoken by the narrator, and is accompanied by Mewtwo's breathy telepathic voice, asking who, what, and where he is, and stating that he is ready to be. Cut to inside a laboratory, and the movie switches to Mewtwo's point of view as he opens his eyes and finds himself in what looks like a giant test tube, some sort of liquid(considering the circumstances, I seriously doubt it's water.) surrounding him. The movie switches back to normal point of view, showing scientists in awe of the fact that Mewtwo has survived the cloning process. Mewtwo says that he needs to be outside, with "the voices," and telekinetically shatters the giant test tube, leaving the liquid inside to spill out onto the floor, Again, the scientists are in awe. One of them(Dr. Fuji?) silences the others, wanting to hear Mewtwo's psychic powers. Once Mewtwo demonstrates his powers by using telepathy, Fuji explains that Mewtwo was created by the scientists, which angers Mewtwo, making him realize that he's just "the end result of an experiment." Fuji assures him that the experiment isn't over, and the scientists congratulate each other, angering Mewtwo even more. In a fit of rage, he destroys the laboratory, presumably killing everyone inside. As he surveys the carnage, Giovanni walks up to him and offers to train him, on the grounds that they're equals, and that, unless Mewtwo can keep his powers under control, he'll end up destroying everything(really?! You're a little late, dude!). Mewtwo reluctantly agrees. Cue training montage that's only missing "Eye Of The Tiger." Once the training is complete, Giovanni reveals that Mewtwo was created to serve him. Mewtwo reminds him that they were supposed to be equals. Giovanni tells him that - insert "I lied!" picture here - HE LIED! His intention was to use Mewtwo as a tool for world domination. How does Mewtwo feel about that? Well, let's just say that that's the rest we see of Giovanni in the movie. Next up is something that the Pokémon movies are known for; amazing title sequences! This one in particular shows the movie's alternate name: Mewtwo Strikes Back. The Pokémon movies tended to have alternate names(Mewtwo Strikes Back, The Power Of One, etc.), up until Jirachi: Wish Maker. By the way, that's right; it took them this long to reveal the name of the movie. We finally see Ash and his friends, who are taking a rest and waiting for Brock to finish making what he calls "Lazy Boy No-Chew Stew," which he says would be perfect for Ash, who is in danger of passing out from hunger. When a trainer challenges Ash to a battle, however, he gets a second wind. The viewers are treated to a few things here. A short battle, an alternate, extended version of the Pokémon theme song, and the first appearance of the Generation II Pokémon, Donphan. After the battle, a random Dragonite is sent by Mewtwo to go find Ash, and deliver an invitation. The invitation is to a gathering on New Island, and only the strongest Pokémon trainers are invited(why Brock and Misty didn't get invited is beyond me, considering they're Gym Leaders.). Ash, of course, accepts, since it wouldn't be much of a movie if he didn't. They learn that, in order to reach New Island, they'll be taking a chartered ferry from Old Shore Wharf. Or, at least, they're supposed to. A dangerous storm is making travelling by the ferry impossible. In fact, a lady announces that the storm is prophetic, and it's called "The Winds Of Water." It had only happened once prior to the events of the movie, and it nearly wiped out all life on Earth. The Pokémon who were spared began crying, and their tears brought the victims back to life. As crazy as that sounds, those of you who've actually seen the movie know that that becomes important later. A male trainer speaks up, saying that, since he only trains Water-type Pokémon, he could make it to New Island. The lady, as well as the local Officer Jenny, warn him against it, saying that not only are the waves treacherous, but, if his Pokemon were to be injured, there would be no medical help, as the local Nurse Joy has gone missing. Despite the clear warnings, the trainers head for the island, except for Ash and his friends, who don't have any Pokémon powerful enough to make it through the storm. Enter Team Rocket, disguised as Vikings, ship and all. Ever oblivious, our heroes accept a ride. In fact, only Brock seems to be onto the scheme, questioning whether or not Vikings still exist. Ash, however, assures him that they exist, but that "they mostly live in Minnesota," a reference to The Minnesota Vikings, a football team. And there goes the fourth wall. With that out of the way, the ship is nearly capsized by a giant wave. The wave somehow manages to tear Team Rocket's disguise off, revealing that they were wearing their uniforms underneath. Anime logic. Anyway, there are obviously bigger things to worry about, so the groups split up, our heroes arriving at New Island via Squirtle and Staryu. They're greeted by a lady who Brock recognizes as one of the Pokémon World's many Nurse Joys. The lady refutes the claim, however, insisting that she had lived on the island for her entire life, in the service of her master. She leads them inside a large building and announces that everyone is now present. Only those who made it through the storm were worthy to be there. Fair enough. After some introductions, Mewtwo reveals himself. He demonstrates his powers by deflecting a Hyper Beam back to its caster, a Gyarados. Mewtwo then states that he intends to rid the world of humans in order to save Pokemon. The trainers' Pokémon will not be spared, as they have "disgraced themselves by serving trainers." Pikachu tells him off, but he just says Pikachu is as pathetic as the rest. Apparently, he has finally crossed a line, because Ash challenges him to a Pokémon battle. Mewtwo reveals that he has Venusaur, Charizard, and Blastoise(all 3 on the same team, in Generation I? Hand over the GameShark, Mewtwo.), so Ash and 2 other trainers challenge him with the same Pokémon. Unfortunately, Mewtwo's Pokémon are more powerful. This is due to the fact that they're clones(again, GameShark.). Mewtwo claims that, since he won, he deserves to take the Pokémon he defeated. To do that, he conjures several Pokéballs. These are special, though, in that they can can capture Pokémon from other trainers. Alright; that's it! http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/GameShark Anyway, Ash is having none of it, and he jumps down a hole, reaching a laboratory(which, by the way, Team Rocket had found a few minutes prior.). Enraged, he breaks the machine that's being used to clone the Pokémon. Too little, too late, unfortunately; the clones have been made, and they're being unleashed. Back in the main room, Mewtwo seems to know what Ash did, and, furthermore, he doesn't seem to care; he's rather nonplussed when Ash comes busting through the wall, alongside the captured Pokémon(breaking the machine freed them.)! Shit just got real. Unfortunately, the mood only stays for a few seconds, because Ash decides to punch Mewtwo! Twice! REALLY?! Mewtwo sends him flying, and rightfully so, but Ash is saved by a random pink bubble! Enter Mew, who screws around a little bit before getting hit with a Shadow Ball. Alright; SERIOUSLY?! Mewtwo is totally cheating! That move DIDN'T EXIST in Generation I!! This starts a huge fight. Eventually, Mewtwo is finally injured; his own Shadow Ball is shot back at him by Mew. Mewtwo decides to start another battle. This one is between his cloned Pokémon, and the original Pokémon they were cloned from. This battle, and the events that follow it, are what most people remember from the movie. With the Pokémon going at it tooth and nail, quite literally, the trainers, as well as Nurse Joy and even Team Rocket, realize that the Pokemon aren't engaging in normal conflict; they're fighting to the death. Ash remarks that someone needs to refuse to fight. He uses Pikachu, who is engaging in a one-sided slap fight with his clone, as an example. Finally, having seen enough, he does something that Pokémon fans everywhere remember; he runs onto the battlefield and gets hit with 2 attacks at once. When the dust settles, Ash is laying on the floor, turned into stone. Pikachu runs over to him and starts Thundershocking him, but to no avail. Finally, realizing he was "killed" as the result of a meaningless battle, the Pokémon(original and clone alike.) start crying. In what can be described as many things(cheesy and beautiful among them.), their tears bring Ash back to "life." Mewtwo realizes that not all humans are as bad as the scientists, and he leaves, bringing the clones with him. As he leaves, though, he wipes everyone's memory, then teleports them all back to Old Shore Wharf. They wonder where they are, but Nurse Joy's arrival placates them. The storm from before is still going strong... for a few seconds. When it dies down, Ash and his friends walk outside, where Ash sees Mew in the sky. This is dismissed as a hallucination, and the narrator says that there are still many more adventures awaiting our heroes. Oh, how right he was. Team Rocket gets the last word. They point out that they don't know how they ended up where they are, then end the movie by saying "Team Rocket's signing off again!" The credits are typical Pokémon movie fare; scenes of the main characters going about their lives, set to music that, while usually good, tends not to have much to do with the movie. Jirachi: Wish Maker hit the nail on the head with one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard in my life. Anyway, after the credits, the viewers are treated to one last sight of Mew, before it flies away, heading for the mountains. And that ends my synopsis! What do I think? I think, if you haven't seen this movie, and you don't have a good reason for it, you're not a Pokémon fan. Seriously, check your basement and/or attic, or go to a thrift store or something. Don't bother with eBay or Amazon, because you can expect to pay quite a bit; this isn't a very cheap movie. Neither are the next 2, so, if you can find them at Goodwill, or a similar place, you should jump at the opportunity. Oh, and, by the way, I lied; my review isn't over. It just so happens that there's a mini-movie that was shown with this. It was called "Pikachu's Vacation," and, obviously, it was included with the home video releases, as well. Let's go! I wanna take a moment to point out that the "Pikachu The Movie" intro for this short is adorable; Pikachu chases an opening in the black screen, then squeezes himself through it. With that out of the way, the show starts. By the way, almost the entire thing is narrated by Ash's Pokédex, Dexter. Ash, Misty, and Brock have taken their Pokemon to an amusement park for Pokémon, and are leaving them there for a little while. Unfortunately, with the rest of them playing, it's up to Pikachu, Bulbasaur, and Squirtle to look after Togepi. Arceus help them all. Togepi starts crying from hunger, so Pikachu makes funny faces to cheer it up. It actually works, until Squirtle decides to be a dick and scare the poor thing. Pikachu manages to find an apple, though, which Bulbasaur cuts down with Razor Leaf. Unfortunately, the apple rolls right into Psyduck, who promptly eats it! I wonder if there are laws against child abuse in the Pokémon world. Yeah, Togepi is a Pokémon, but we're splitting hairs at this point. Anyway, Bulbasaur rocks Togepi with Vine Whip until it calms down. It also sings(Dexter calls it the Bulba-Bye.). What follows is one of several special scene transitions. *Transition #1: 2 Bellsprout on a trippy background.* Togepi has fallen asleep, and Pikachu and friends are happy. Suddenly, though, 4 Pokémon walk up to them. Dexter identifies them as Snubbull, Cubone, Raichu, and Marill. Pikachu tells them to be quiet, so as not to wake up Togepi. They see those as fighting words, though, despite Pikachu's attempts to calm them down. Pikachu says that they should set a good example for Togepi, who, at this point, is running off. Once Pikachu realizes that, he chases after it. *Transition #2: A bunch of Water type Pokémon are shown. The last of them is Magikarp, who uses Bubble, which Magikarp can't naturally learn(GameShark strikes back.).* Pikachu finds Togepi walking across a log being used as a bridge. It's unstable, though; when Pikachu gets on it, it starts rolling, leaving him frantically struggling to stay on. Togepi is enjoying it, though. Soon, Pikachu falls into a river. When he surfaces, he sees the log fall into a lake. He worries about Togepi, but soon sees it walking along the nearby cliff. *Transition #3: A Slowpoke yawns for a long time.* Meanwhile, Snubbull and Squirtle are trying to see who can puff out their chests more. Squirtle loses, so Bulbasaur steps in. It spins its eyes around, which makes Snubbull dizzy. Pikachu returns with Togepi just in time to see that Marill has challenged Squirtle. *Transition #4: Several Primeape are fighting; we get a super close-up of one of them.* A lake(likely the one from before.) is shown, as Marill and Squirtle prepare for what is now revealed to be a race. An Electrode rolls in, then uses Selfdestruct(equivalent to a starting pistol?), starting the race, which, appropriately, is set to Angela Via's "Catch Me If You Can." Marill takes an early lead, but ends up hitting a Starmie, which blasts it back to the start with Water Gun. Squirtle is confident that it can win, but it ends up on top of a Goldeen, which carries it back. Squirtle jumps off and swims to the finish line, but Marill already won. *Transition #5: Some Exeggutor and Oddish are marching.* Pikachu tries to play peacemaker, but soon has to run off and comfort Togepi, who was frightened by Raichu's sparks. A stray spark hits Pikachu, which causes Raichu and its gang to laugh. They've finally crossed a line, though; Pikachu turns around menacingly and threatens Raichu. They both press their cheeks together(Pikachu's right cheek against Raichu's left. This would be cute in almost any other context.) and run off, their speed and power increased by the electricity they're producing. They plow through everything, and everyone, in their way. *Transition #6: Several Diglett and Dugtrio pop up out of the ground in rhythm, before they all pop up at once.* Team Rocket is shown(or, at least, Arbok, Meowth, and Weezing are.). Meowth is about to take a nap, but he, and the other 2, get launched straight up by Pikachu and Raichu. *Transition #7: A bunch of Farfetch'd run in straight lines. One of them winks at the screen.* The next victims are a Hitmonchan and Hitmonlee, who suffer the same fate as Team Rocket. *Transition #8: A Chansey, soon followed by more Chansey, is dancing.* Pikachu and Raichu make the mistake of stepping on the tail of Ash's Charizard. Angry about that, as well as about being woken up from its nap, Charizard runs in front of them and blows them back with what I believe to be Whirlwind. Pikachu and Raichu are blown off of the cliff, landing on the belly of a Snorlax. They bounce off and hit the ground, then get crushed as Snorlax rolls over. They emerge from underneath, eager to keep going, but they both fall over from exhaustion. Charizard flies around triumphantly, but crashes and gets its head stuck in a pipe. Meowth, again trying to take a nap, yells at it, but a Flamethrower shuts him up. *Transition #9: Several Magnemite crowd around a machine. The screen fades to black multiple times. Each time it does, there are more Magnemite on the machine when the screen goes back to normal. Finally, they rush towards the screen.* The other Pokémon(minus Raichu's gang and Team Rocket.) try pulling Charizard's head out of the pipe, but Charizard is too strong, and sends them flying. Pikachu begs for Raichu's gang to help, and, except for Cubone, they agree. "Cubone pines for the mother it will never see again. Seeing a likeness of its mother in the full moon, it cries. The stains on the skull the Pokémon wears are made by the tears it sheds." - Pokémon Ruby and Sapphire. "Cubone has earned its classification as the 'Lonely Pokémon from its usual attitude of caring only for itself." - Pikachu's Vacation. Big difference! Anyway, Cubone eventually helps out, and they're able to free Charizard. That's the final straw for Meowth, who pulls a bomb out of Hammerspace. Charizard lands on him, though, causing him to take the blast. Charizard stands up, revealing a blackened Meowth. The Pokémon decide to celebrate by... making a playground? Alright. *Transition #10: A bunch of Jigglypuff roll across the screen, singing. The song is different from the classic Jigglypuff Lullaby.* As the sun sets, Ash, Misty, and Brock, call for their Pokémon. Pikachu shakes hands(paws?) with Snubbull before running off, then jumping into Ash's arms. Ash asks if he had fun, to which Pikachu's answer, while unintelligible, is positive. And there you have it! Mewtwo Strikes Back and Pikachu's Vacation! They represent a simpler time. There were only 151 Pokémon, and there was no breeding, Pokemon Amie, Global Link,... Hell, back then, Pokémon lacked so much of what we take for granted today. Does that mean we should dismiss these as dusty relics? Absolutely not! For many Pokémon fans, Generation I was their childhood. There were only 3 Ghost types, and 3 Dragon types(and only 1 Dragon type move.), and Psychic types destroyed everything. Okay, so Generation I lacked variety, but what do you expect? The point is, we shouldn't forget our roots, and Mewtwo Strikes Back, with its tense storyline, high-octane fights, and soulful soundtrack, is definitely a look back at the best Generation I had to offer. It's still worth watching, even now! Join me next time, when I'll be reviewing the next movie, The Power Of One! Can it compete with its predecessor? Will the combined might of 4 Legendary Pokémon be enough to outdo the 2 from this movie? Tune in next time to find out! ArdillaVerde93 signing off. Gotta Catch 'Em All!
  10. Game: Tekken Tag Tournament 2. Platform: PS3, WiiU, XBox 360. *SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT A TEST!! AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE WILL FOLLOW!! XD* Ah, Namco. Where would gaming be without you? Sure, you didn't come up with Pokemon, Halo(I'm not implying I play Halo, because I don't. It doesn't appeal to me.), or Guitar Hero, but you brought us such games as Galaga, Pac-Man,... Hell; arcades would've sucked without Namco. Not to mention, the upcoming new Super Smash Bros. game is being partly developed by Namco. So, today, I'm here to talk about their flagship fighting game franchise, Tekken. More specifically, the awesomeness that is Tekken Tag Tournament 2. By the way, I feel I should mention that I have the PS3 version, so your experience may vary. You may have noticed that I didn't list the price, which I did in my previous reviews. That's because, as a retail game, the price depends on the store. I got my copy(new, for reasons I'll explain soon.) at GameStop for less than $20, so it shouldn't break the bank. If you have a choice, don't buy a used copy. Shell out an extra few bucks for a new copy; otherwise, you may be in for some sticker shock. In order to play the game online, you need an online pass. There's a code on the back of the instruction manual, which can be entered and redeemed for the pass. Without it, you'll have to pay $10 for the pass. Anyway, I'm rambling; on to the game! As the name implies, Tekken Tag Tournament 2 is the sequel to Tekken Tag Tournament. Tekken Tag Tournament was released in 1999 as a launch title for the then-new PS2. You're probably familiar with the term "long-awaited sequel." Well, try 13 years! Apparently, Namco releases Tekken Tag Tournament games after every 3 main series games; the first one came out after Tekken 3, and the second one came out after Tekken 6. Tekken Tag Tournament 2, like it's predecessor, is a non-canonical spin-off, with a simple idea: take all of the Tekken characters, and put them all in 1 game! Simple, but effective. Tekken Tag Tournament 2 includes 16 characters from Tekken 1, 4 characters from Tekken 2, 13 characters from Tekken 3, 6 characters from Tekken 4, 6 characters from Tekken 5, and 7 characters from Tekken 6. There's also Unknown, from the first Tekken Tag Tournament, and newcomers Slim Bob and Sebastian. Here's a breakdown. Remember the spoiler alert? Well,... that. The list is in the format of character/ethnicity/fighting style. Alex/Unknown/Unique(shares a moveset with Roger Jr.). Alisa Bosconovitch/Russian(she's an android, made by a Russian.)/Unique. Ancient Ogre(Ogre in previous games.)/Unknown/Unique. Angel/Unknown/Kazama Style(plus flight and lasers.). Anna Williams/Irish/Aikido. Armor King/Mexican/Wrestling. Asuka Kazama/Japanese/Kazama Style. Baek Doo San/Korean/Taekwondo. Bruce Irvin/African-American/Kickboxing. Bryan Fury/American/Kickboxing. Christie Montiero/Brazilian/Capoeira(shares a moveset with Eddy Gordo and Tiger Jackson.). Combot/NA/Customizable. Craig Marduk/African-American/Vale Tudo. Devil Jin/Unknown/Kazama Style(plus flight and lasers.) Eddy Gordo/Brazilian/Capoeira(shares a moveset with Christie Montiero and Tiger Jackson.). Eleonor Klissen(Leo.)/German/Bajiquan. Emile de Rochefort(Lili.)/French/Savate and street fighting. Feng Wei/Chinese/Kenpo. Forest Law/American/Jeet Kune Do. Ganryu/Japanese/Sumo Wrestling. Gepetto Bosconovitch(Dr. Bosconovitch.)/Russian/Unique. Heihachi Mishima/Japanese/Mishima Style. Hwoarang/Korean/Taekwondo. Jack-6/Unknown/Power fighting and guns. Jinpachi Mishima/Japanese/Mishima Style(plus otherworldly powers.) Julia Chang(Jaycee.)/Native American/Lucha Libre. Jun Kazama/Japanese/Kazama Style. Kazuya Mishima and Devil Kazuya/Japanese/Mishima Style(plus flight and lasers.) King/Mexican/Wrestling. Kuma/Unknown/Unique(shares a moveset with Panda.). Kunimitsu/Unknown/Ninjitsu. Lars Alexandersson/Swedish/Karate. Lee Chaolan/Unknown/Mishima Style. Lei Wulong/Unknown/Mixed styles, predominately 5 Form Kung Fu and Drunken Fist. Ling Xiaoyu/Chinese/Mixed Chinese styles, predominately Hakke-Sho and Hikka-Ken. Marshall Law/American/Jeet Kune Do. Michelle Chang/Native American/Mixed. Miharu Hirano/Chinese/Mixed(shares a moveset with Ling Xiaoyu.). Mokujin/Unknown/Random(copies a random character's moveset each match.) Nina Williams/Irish/Aikido. Ogre(True Ogre in previous games.)/Unknown/Mixed(plus otherworldly powers.) Panda/Chinese/Unique(shares a moveset with Kuma.). Paul Phoenix/American/Judo. Prototype Jack/Unknown/Unique. Robert Richards(Bob and Slim Bob.)/American/Freestyle Karate. Roger Jr./Australian/Unique(shares a moveset with Alex.). Sebastian/French/Savate and street fighting(shares a moveset with Emile de Rochefort.). Sergei Dragunov/Russian/Sambo. Steve Fox/British/Boxing. Tiger Jackson/Unknown/Capoeira(shares a moveset with Christie Montiero and Eddy Gordo.) Unknown/Unknown/Unique(Jun Kazama's moveset plus otherworldly powers.). All the fighting game stereotypes are here. You have your Bruce Lee knockoffs(Forest and Marshall.), your little girls who don't look like they can fight their way out of a paper bag(Xiaoyu, Miharu, and Lili.), your joke characters(the list goes on.), and your magical beings(Jinpachi, Unknown, Angel, Devil Kazuya, and Devil Jin.). That's not necessarily a bad thing, though. With so many characters(albeit some with matching movesets.), and so many moves(some characters have more moves by themselves than the entire roster of Street Fighter IV combined.), this game provides plenty of variety. Speaking of moves, Combot is a special character. Combot debuted in Tekken 4, as a Mokujin knockoff. In Tekken Tag Tournament 2, however, through a separate storyline, which I won't spoil, it's possible to customize Combot's moveset with moves from other characters! Every character in the large roster can be customized(some more than others; you can't do shit with Unknown and Tiger, besides changing their special effects, which are cosmetic, anyway. You can also change the picture that appears before a match if you're using them.), and thoroughly so. Want a ninja with a maid's outfit? You can do that(base character was Kunimitsu.)! Want Fluttershy? You can do that(base character was Michelle Chang.)! I even made Tripp(base character was Steve Fox.)! I love games that have things you can customize, so, naturally, I enjoyed, and still enjoy, this feature. However, character customization is nothing new. Enter Tekken Tunes, a feature that allows you to customize the soundtrack! With Tekken Tunes, you can replace the soundtrack with songs from your hard drive! The possibilities for this are endless! How would you like to be greeted on the main menu by Welcome To The Jungle by Guns N Roses? What about beating the shit out of some poor soul in a Winter wonderland, to the tune of Christmas Don't Be Late by Alvin And The Chipmunks? You can do those things, and more! As with the character customization, I greatly enjoy this feature. Of course, what most people think of when they think of Tekken is people getting laid out by the fists of fury of one of many possible assailants. Well, don't worry; there's no shortage of that! The main draw of Tekken Tag Tournament 2 is that you can use 2 characters at once. That means you have 2 movesets to work with! Plus, depending on what characters you choose, you may be able to use special Tag Throws! Teams that can use these special Tag Throws usually consist of characters that are somehow related, either by friendship(Xiaoyu and Miharu.), blood(Jin and Jun Kazama.), mentoring(Baek and Hwoarang.), or some other way. The game doesn't tell you how to do these throws, so you have to guess. However, I'll tell you some. Lili's Rafflesia throw -> tag out to Leo. Lei's Dragon Falls throw -> tag out to Feng. Feng's Avalanche throw -> tag out to Lei. Raven's Undertaker throw -> tag out to Kunimitsu. Anyone with the Stonehead throw -> tag out to anyone with the Stonehead throw. Hwoarang/Baek's Human Cannonball throw -> tag out to Hwoarang/Baek. Kuma/Panda's Bear Hug throw -> tag out to Kuma/Panda. Christie/Eddy/Tiger's Rodeo Spin throw -> tag out to Christie/Eddy/Tiger. Armor King's Hades Bomb throw -> tag out to King. Michelle's Death Valley Bomb throw -> tag out to Jaycee. Jaycee's Backdrop throw -> tag out to Michelle. There are plenty more for curious players to discover. By the way, the graphics are beautiful, especially during the cutscenes. The sound is great, and, for the most part, customizable. Now, last but not least, let's talk about DLC. DLC for this game really only appeals to the Tekken faithful; you can buy music and cutscene packs from the previous Tekken games. I consider this to be a waste of money, since you can see the cutscenes online, and you can download the soundtracks for free online, if you know where to go. Oh, well; for a game this great, I can't hold that against it. I give Tekken Tag Tournament 2 a 3.85 out of 5. It's a wonderful game, and it'll definitely keep you occupied for hours, but having to use a pass to get online is ridiculous.
  11. Game: Pokémon Snap. Platform: Nintendo 64, Wii(Virtual Console). Price(Virtual Console.): 1,000 points($10.). *SPOILER ALERT!!! THIS IS NOT A TEST!! AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE WILL FOLLOW!!* There's a popular screencap that shows Professor Oak with a suggestive expression on his face. The text below him reads "Press A to do it!" If you've ever wondered where that's from, wonder no more. Pokémon Snap is one of many spin-offs in the Pokémon series. Others include Pokémon Trozei, Hey You Pikachu, and Pokémon Channel(side note: I LOVE Pokémon Channel!! Even though the UK version of the game is definitely better, since it lets you download a Jirachi to a copy of Pokémon Ruby or Pokémon Sapphire, Pokémon Channel is one of my favorite GameCube games. I wish one of the GameStops near me had a copy.). Since it's a spin-off, don't expect to be thrust into the world of Pokémon, assuming the guise of a 10-year-old kid who has been tasked with capturing a myriad of creatures. That's not to say you won't be capturing them, however; you just won't be relying on Pokéballs to do so. You'll be capturing over 60 Pokemon... on film! When you turn on the game, after the N64 logo disappears, you're shown a short cinematic of the game's protagonist, Todd Snap(who actually appeared in the anime! The more you know!). He attempts to take a picture of the Legendary Pokémon, Mew. Unfortunately, he's not quick enough, and only manages to get a picture of Mew's tail. After you've seen Todd's unfortunate failure, the game presents you with the title screen, in which a Pikachu attempts to avoid being run down by something resembling a dune buggy. That vehicle is known as the Zero-One, and you'll become familiar with it VERY soon. As for the screen itself, it gives you 4 options: "New Game," "Continue," "Gallery," and "Options." Nothing out of the ordinary. Obviously, let's start with "New Game," as the rest of the options are self-explanatory. The first thing the game allows you to do is name your character. Predictably, "Todd" is the default name. Sorry, everyone; there's no rival. Unless you really hate Todd, or you have little self-esteem, nobody in the game is gonna be named "Douche," "Faggot," "Asshole," "Dickhead," etc. Anyway, moving on. Once you've named your character, you meet Professor Oak, who -surprise, surprise- has a task for you to complete. Pokémon Island(the setting of the game.) is full of Pokémon, and he wants you to photograph them! The first level in the game is just called "Beach." That's another thing; don't expect imaginative level names. Anyway, you're quickly shown a good photo opportunity, which the game walks you through. After that, however, you're on your own. Once the first level(and all of the levels, for that matter.) ends, you'll be able to choose what pictures you want to show to Professor Oak. Keep in mind that you can only choose 1 picture per Pokémon, and that any pictures you don't pick will be gone for good, so choose wisely. Actually, that's only partially true. Early on, you'll get the ability to choose more pictures, but you can still only show one picture per Pokémon to Oak; the rest will go in a separate album. Professor Oak grades your pictures, and assigns points to them, based on a few things. 1: How big the Pokémon is. 2: How they're posing. 3: Whether or not they're in the center of the picture. 4: Special pictures, like Pikachu on a surfboard, or a picture of a Legendary Pokémon. Obviously, this is a bit of a casual game, but it still requires decent reflexes; you can't put the Zero-One in reverse, so, if you miss a good photo op, you're likely gonna have to replay the level. Don't worry; it's not quite as tedious as it sounds. The stages are short. Sometimes TOO short, in fact. As I said before, the different species of Pokémon available in Pokémon Snap only number a little over 60. Obviously, the fan favorites are present here. Butterfree, Charizard, Pikachu, Jigglypuff, and Eevee, to name a few. Also, all 5 Generation I Legendary Pokémon(read: Articuno, Zapdos, Moltres, Mewtwo, and Mew.) make appearances. The Pokémon that appear are animated pretty well; they dance, interact, attack(harmlessly.), and more. The gameplay is nice, and doesn't get tedious too quickly. It can be challenging at times, though. As you progress, you'll unlock items to help you out. You can use Pokémon food to lure Pokémon, or you can smack them with it. Pester Balls are used to knock Pokémon down, or, in some cases, out. The Poké Flute can make Pokémon dance or attack, depending on the song, which changes with successive uses. The challenge is in figuring out how to best use those items. Okay; serious time now. What I'm about to say can be considered both good and bad; this game was certainly ahead of its time. Pokémon Snap came out at a time when Pokémon was the next big thing; the anime was still in Season 1, Pokémon Red, Blue, or Yellow was jammed into nearly every Game Boy, and Pokémon cards were causing many a fight on the playground. Pokémon didn't reach the height of its popularity until Generation III(a Generation that I dislike immensely.), but first steps are important. Nintendo knew they had struck gold with Pokemon, and they went all out to make sure everyone else knew it, too. This was also a time when Blockbuster was still very much a thing. Why is that important? Stay with me; I'm going somewhere with this. Some call them Snap Stations. Some call them Sticker Stations. They were, for lack of a better term, kiosks, set up in various Blockbuster stores, that, at the cost of $3, allowed people to print out pictures taken in Pokémon Snap, on sticker paper. These stations, obviously, no longer exist. They attempted to recreate them in the Virtual Console version by allowing players to post 1 picture a day to the Wii Message Board. Unfortunately, I have terrible news. On Tuesday, May 20th, 2014, a week before this writing, Nintendo shut down Wi-Fi for the DS, DSi, and Wii. A moment of silence, please. You, in the back, please take your hat off. We're in mourning. *The Time Has Come(Pikachu's Goodbye) plays.* Anyway, as much as it pains me, nearly all support for Pokémon Snap is gone, so I'm gonna have to take points off. So, here's what I'm gonna do. I'll rate it twice! If all of the support was still there, this game would get 4.10 out of 5. Few games, even with today's technology, give players the ability to have physical evidence of their adventures. However, that's not the way things are anymore. So, as it stands, Pokémon Snap gets 3 out of 5. It was ambitious, and that's great, but it's stale. If ever a game needed, and deserved, a remake, that game is Pokémon Snap.
  12. Dungeon Fighter Online Image Copyright: NeoPle Inc, 2014. Dungeon Fighter Online is an Action/Beam 'Em Up MMORPG for the PC which is currently in Alpha release by the South Korean based Developers NeoPle. A member here, MegaZero64 (whom I've known personally for many years) suggested Dungeon Fighter Online (DFO) and gave me a link to download the Anti-Cheat shield and downloaded so I could play it. MegaZero64 is none other than DatLoli. MegaZero64 may release a review based on his perspective as a seasoned player, even before NeoPle took the project on. I am a completely new player; someone who never played this game before or any of its series. Review may contain bad language. I have to admit at first I wasn't sure what I was looking at, honestly. I even said to myself "Fuck that doesn't look like something I want to play, ever." I tried MapleStory, made by the people originally behind this game Nexon, I will talk about that later. But even as I was typing my initial impressions I was thinking about events that happened earlier this year; short version of the story behind this is in the quote below. Basically events earlier this February gave me a chance to learn about my fiancee's family more. I *TRULY* kept an open mind and for once; and I got to learn about them; they got to learn about me but most importantly I got a chance to speak to her dad about stuff and life. He reinforced what I learnt, unknowingly in loads of different ways. Like making me try something new (Like adding red wine to beef while I was frying it!) I honestly did a lot of stuff that I never did before. Sure I didn't like all of it but I did like the trying new experiences and ultimately I decided that I'd keep more of an open mind. So as I was saying; I remembered to try something new. Hell "You never know. You might fucking like it." So I said "Fuck it. Bro; I'll at least try it." To cut a long story short; Good decision. I went to the website, and connected my Facebook account to it (I'm not sure if that's mandatory; it could be optional). It wanted to download a "Plugin" as well as HackShield by AhnLab Inc, as an administrator I wasn't overly happy about it but I took the plunge still. So downloading even on my own connection was a bit slow at first. In total the game used 3.21GB on my hard drive; but I don't know if it grows the more areas I visit (and thus cached). There was a small issue originally - I had no idea what I was doing. Ultimately if you don't have a fast connection downloading it may take a while. System Requirements (Curtsy of System Requirements Lab): Minimum: CPU: Pentium 3 800 MHz or Higher (Athlon) CPU Speed: 800 MHz RAM: 128 MB OS: Windows 2000 Video Card: nVidia GeForce 4 MX 440 Sound Card: Yes Free Disk Space: 5 GB Recommended: CPU: Pentium 4: 3.0 GHz or Higher CPU Speed: 3.0 GHz RAM: 512 MB OS: Windows XP or Better [in fact you shouldn't be using XP - Friends don't let friends use Windows XP.] Video Card: GeForce FX Series with Support for Pixel Shader 1.4 Sound Card: Yes Free Disk Space: 10 GB Once I was actually in game I found myself going through to select a server; however I selected the wrong on (A more advanced server) it's best to go for the Beginner Servers and advance up. I didn't know this but I do now. I should point out that I have played MapleStory before, years and years ago for all of an hour. It didn't hold my interest (And still doesn't). I had started with a Male Fighter Class - I usually find the best way for me to start as I've said before, is if I have the choice my first character of any game will be male (like me) and will be a Gunner (Or someone who uses heavy weaponry a lot, the exception to the rule for this was PayDay2, a review for another time.) I called my character Tripp (surprised it let me, to be honest) and off I went. As soon as you select your character and name it you're shown some backstory associated with your character. It gives you a feel for the game and I'm told that it's different per character type. I think this is a good touch and it's very well done. I found myself going through a Tutorial of sorts. Mashing keys on my keyboard I'd normally never use in this way. Before I knew it I completed the tutorial but still had many, many questions about how to do the simplest stuff, luckily I had MegaZero64 over on Steam Voice Chat answering every annoying question I possibly could; like a good 'newb'. But I took attention and really the learning curve wasn't all that bad actually. I truly feel the game was completely unbalanced, in the gamer's favour. but really "it gets more challenging; and a hell of a lot more fun" (and it's already pretty fun) or so I am told. Two hours went by in a flash, and by then I was already picking up the game at a fantastic learning curve. I figured out that I didn't need to mash keys and that really I could do some impressive combo-stuff. And BOY did I take that chance. I like to think my little Digital Tripp was learning as I was learning. Now apparently that they do a lot of resets; or have done resets in the past but as you all know if I had a gripe about this I'd be; 1) Hypocritical and 2) Stupid or ignorant. As I said it is in alpha phase at the moment (Not even in Beta) so I expect shit like this to crop up from time to time, and honestly it doesn't feel like an Alpha. Sure some it looks very Beta (coming soon stuff), for a free Alpha it functioned, operated and preformed beautifully, I explain this later. I should point out it is something you can play on your own; but it is much better with a friend or four. Unfortunately Neppy then informed me that it was 2AM and she was going to bed. She said she didn't mind me staying up and continue playing but I decided to call it a night and off to bed I went. ... Moving on to the next day (Sorry everyone! xP) After I played an unrelated game (already mentioned, tut tut) to do some much needed "Anger Venting" (Things during the day piss me off sometimes. Non-Neppy related things.) I got into a Voice Conversation again and hopped back on to DFO. My second day kicked ass. We went off to do some quests and kill hordes of ... By this point Fodder, and bagged ourselves a tonne of loot and gold. We even met Gabriel a few times (Trader after the boss fight) which I've learnt is a very good and uncommon thing. Eventually I upgraded my skills and leveled them up and got new weapons (ditching the cannon), armour and even a hat! My Armour loadout towards the end was a Ring Shoulder (Heavy Armour), Red Tiger Leather Coat, Red Tiger Trousers, Leather Strap, Sya Overshoes, Cross bowgun (Weapon) Used Cotton Arm Guard, Durable Plantain Ring and an Avatar Item Navy Duty Cap. In this play time I figured out how to use my classes better, and started working on putting them closer together so I could string better combos and ultimately do horrible, horrible things to the even more Fodder. My skills? Rising Shot Lv5, M-137 Gatling Gun Lv3, M-3 Flamethrower Lv1, RX-78 Land Runner Lv4 and two more slots that I paid absolutely no attention to what so ever because by this point as I said; the game was unbalanced in our favour. The game was no longer about mindlessly mashing keys, sure I wasn't immersed in the storyline (Might have something to do with the Spam "Buy Gold" bots that seem to be plaguing it) but I was having so much fun. This time I spent a good 3-4 hours if not more, and even went through the 02:00 - 03:00GMT invasion of the town, which as the title says the town becomes invaded with creatures which you have to kill and drive back. I learnt a lot about the mobs or enemies that were to come; as well as ways of dealing with them. MechaTau however = Screwed. All fantasy of it being lopsidedly unbalanced in my favour was smacked in my face as it came crashing back into reality, this game is going to get tough later on and I need more and better party tricks. MegaZero64 and I contributed 26-27 wins or so for the nearly 50,000 wins that the server had. That gives you some idea how many people play this game, and that was one server. I enjoyed it a hell of a lot and I would definitely rush to do it again, it's very rewarding especially after questing and looting for hours and it was a great way to end the second night. You hold down CTRL and click the enemy you want to fight (Depending on level, so watch out for what works and what doesn't. It's a great way of earning experience. After the battle the next thing I noticed was how nice a lot of people were. And I noticed that the community snubs and dubs the enemy as Nexon, (I am largly unaware of what's going on but from what I was told; I can see why) but really they were thanking and congratulating everyone for taking part and winning (We reached our target, collectively). Perhaps this game has something big in store. I don't know. But I could play it over and over again and that's good. Also as far as I am aware there is nothing officially in game that you can buy to advance yourself quicker, and whilst this is because it's an Alpha I actually LOVE this model. I hate Pay2Play, I hate Pay2Advance and Pay2BeAhead. The best things in life really are free, so; NeoPle - I give you free advertising. This is the first review I've written for something that I actually genuinely liked. I know NeoPle will likely introduce something to pay for the service; but right now it's awesome, it's free and stable (at least for me). Lastly though, the negative stuff; beware of scammers. As with all MMORPG's I'm sure, don't accept trades until you know what you're doing. People will try ripping you off, it's inevitable. Spambots are fucking annoying and make the chat practically useless, as they pretty much flood the chat across all servers and can even bypass mute/blocking, which makes the Blocking quite pointless to, seeing as the person you block can just buy Megaphones and keep talking to you. Not good. The Tutorial is lacking, a lot. It didn't cover or convey a reasonable message to me about the UI (User Interface) and such. Or it did and I lost focus or attention on it, the UI isn't clear on a lot of things but once you know it's there, you pretty much know where it is. The option to full-screen should be put on the settings menu in my opinion so it is switch-able. All minor and relatively petty things that I am sure will be patched or sorted in one way or another and NeoPle should be forgiven for that considering. All in all I give this game an astonishing 4.5 out of 5 - Why? Pros: It's learning curve is actually quite excellent.For an Alpha it's feature rich, virtually bug free (As far as I could tell, although I know there's no such thing, really.)Its got a nice neutral sound track and awesome battle/boss music tracks.The community is friendly, from what I've seen although very random sometimes.No disconnects. Their servers are pretty solid.It's free.It's fun.Character Backstory is clear and concise. Yet optional. You can skip it. Good for players new and old to the series. Cons:The Spambots. Oh fucking hell the Spambots. Abusing Megaphoning.No option (at least I could find) of hiding the chat. I believe it should be an option.Tutorial is lacking. Some of the most basic features are not in there.Option to fullscreen isn't made clear, to be honest it should be.There was one NPC who would literally die if someone didn't love him or whatever. That kid needs to see a psychiatrist, immediately. Like I would literally die if I didn't type that.All in all the game wins it for me by being virtually bug free, feature rich, well thought out and makes you the player think about what to add to your character with varying bonuses. All in all it's the best damn Alpha I've ever seen (Well it's in the top 10. Kerbal Space Program, Take on Mars and Minecraft were/are also awesome in Alpha). This is no an official endorsement from EcchiDreams. But the personal endorsement of a member of staff who happened to like the game. I will say under good faith; I was not asked to write a review nor was I paid. I genuinely think it's good, ultimately I think the game might be just the sort of thing people who come to EcchiDreams would play, and I highly (and personally) encourage you to "Give it a go." I haven't found Ecchi or Hentai in it, but I'm a newb so take that as you will. Peace. This post has been promoted to an article
  13. This is my first game review on this site, but it's actually taken from my blog on Canterlot.com, though not entirely. Here are the specifics. Game: My Little Pony.Platform: Android.Price: Free. *SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT A TEST!! AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE WILL FOLLOW!! XD* First, the game takes up WAY more space than it says on the app store! When you first start up the game, you'll be notified that over 90 MB of extra data must be downloaded! That wasn't a big problem for me, but, if you have a lot of stuff on your tablet, you may have to delete some stuff, or transfer stuff to an SD card(the Kindle Fire doesn't have that capability, but the game is available for other tablets, too.). With the download out of the way, the game hopefully takes you to a loading screen(the first time I downloaded it, it kept crashing, so I had to delete it, then redownload it.). After loading, you will get to see the "once upon a time" intro(I forgot what episode they used that for.). After another loading screen, Twilight Sparkle descends into Ponyville via a hot air balloon. You'll be seeing this balloon quite a bit. After a tutorial, which requires you to build a windmill, hire Twilight Sparkle to work there, collect Bits from the windmill, and "welcome(the game's way of saying "purchase.")" Bon Bon and Mrs. Cakes, you will be left to explore Ponyville at your leisure. However, there are many quests to be done. The game is reminiscent of FarmVille, but it has a storyline. Nightmare Moon is attempting to shroud Ponyville in eternal night, and you are tasked with gathering The Elements Of Harmony in order to stop her. This is accomplished by activating various "Element Stones," which are scattered around Ponyville. This requires Element Shards, which can be obtained in various ways, the easiest of which is by collecting from shops. Once you reach Level 15, however, you gain access to a separate storyline, which revolves around the Royal Wedding. This also allows you to go to Canterlot, where there are more shops to build, and more ponies to "welcome(there's that word again! Be patient; I'm going somewhere with this.)." In addition to that, the game now allows you to play a mini-game based on the movie Equestria Girls. The objective is simply to make your character of choice dance. I have yet to complete the game. In fact, due to the nature of the game, I doubt that is possible. However, these are some of the good things I've noticed about the game. There's a myriad of ponies that can be "welcomed." The list includes The Mane 6, The Cutie Mark Crusaders, Vinyl Scratch(referred to as "DJ Pon3" in-game.), The Great And Powerful Trixie("Trixie The Magnificent."), Photo Finish, almost the entire Apple family, Octavia Melody, and even Doctor Hooves! Derpy is in the game, but she can't be "welcomed." She hides in a cardboard box. If you find her, she reveals herself and gives you Bits, and, occasionally, even a Gem(more on this in a minute.)! Also, the music in the game, while quite loud, is pretty good! Plus, some important characters(The Mane 6, Mrs. Cakes, and others.) talk when you tap them. However, with good, there's also quite a bit of bad. You're about to see why I've been treating the word "welcome" like a swear word. There are 3 different types of currency in-game. Bits, Gems, and Hearts. Bits are the standard currency, and the easiest to obtain. You can earn them by collecting from shops, playing the Magic Wings mini-game(required to level up one of your ponies.), playing the Balloon Pop game(once a day, or anytime for 10 Gems, or 30 Hearts.), or as a gift from Princess Celestia when you level up. Gems are the premium currency, and are harder to obtain. As I said before, Derpy sometimes gives you one. You also get them sometimes as rewards for quests, alongside Bits and Experience Points(speaking of quests, they tend not to reward you NEARLY enough for what they require you to do!). At higher levels, you may also get one upon leveling up. Hearts are fairly easy to obtain, but you can only get them one way: sharing your progress on Facebook or GameLoft Live. Now, Bits and Gems can also be purchased, but the price isn't cheap. I actually did purchase Gems during a sale, at a price of $2 for 55 Gems. This normally would cost $5. Now, I'm fine with having to pay extra for things such as DLC, but not if it's REQUIRED TO BEAT THE GAME!! Rarity and Rainbow Dash both cost Gems to buy. Also, there's the matter of the Balloon Pop game I mentioned earlier. There are certain characters who can only be unlocked via that game, and only by paying Gems to do so. You are presented with a screen full of balloons, which you must pop. Once you've obtained something from 3 balloons(some of them are empty; these don't count towards your total.), the mini-game ends. Ponies only unlockable via Balloon Pop include Dr. Hooves, The Great And Powerful Trixie, Daring Do, and Photo Finish. Not to mention, you may not win the character you want, and you may not even win any character at all! Risky, but rewarding, especially since you can get Princess Celestia this way for only the 10 Gems it costs to play, whereas she would normally only be available at a cost ot OVER 900 GEMS!!!! In conclusion, if you like games like Oregon Trail: American Settler and FarmVille, this game will likely be worth your time! You don't necessarily even have to be a brony or a pegasister to enjoy it. However, getting the most out of it requires patience, time, luck, and some spare cash. I would rate this game a generous 7.7 out of 10. I enjoy games with variety, but not when they try to screw you out of your hard-earned money. This post has been promoted to an article
×