𝑆𝐾𝐼𝑁 𝐷𝐸𝐸𝑃

[𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡]

Just some ramblings, etc, of my life outside of Roleplay.

[𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡]

Life certainly knows how to kick me when I'm down, but I'm grateful my sister has been there to help me up each time. Without her, I wouldn't have garnered what little energy I could to roll out of bed in the mornings. Without her, I wouldn't have felt as confident in myself as I did this past weekend, let alone meet the new friends she's kindly introduced me to. Without her, I'm not me.

I'll certainly miss our time together once I move to Texas.

[𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡]

I put the knife where it hurts. Because hurt has found its way to my heart and cloaked itself in familiarity. And familiarity is comfort. I find comfort in familiarity.

Don’t you?

I hurt myself when I feel things are going too well. Or when someone is too kind. I withdraw.

The feeling of uncertainty evolves into coldness. And coldness becomes bitter.

I am the ocean. I pull and then push away.

It is of my own volition, my own doing, that I sometimes do terrible things. It’s of my own doing that I’ve become this monster concealed behind the face of an innocent.

No, I don’t want your pity.

I just want to bleed on paper.

[𝘿𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡]

I don’t always feel as well as I should. But when I wake with the sun, I wake with a readiness to tackle the day. I feel like a Viking. Like I can take on anything.

And each morning it starts all over again.