I'm going to avoid answering for a moment to tell a story that made me laugh about improvised lubrication.
Years ago my sister and I were thumbing through a magazine (yes, an actual magazine, so you can guess how ridiculously old we both are) and there was a little tear-out postcard that you could fill out to get a free sample of KY Jelly. Of course we wanted a free sample of KY Jelly, so she filled out the card, and then she started giggling, then laughing, then her eyes were watering she was laughing so hard, and I'll be honest, I had no idea what could possibly be so amusing about her name and address on a post card, so I looked.
The card had the usual stuff - name, address, probably some checkbox about something. But there was a question "what lubricant are you currently using?" and on the little pink line my sister wrote "gravel and thumbtacks" and we couldn't stop laughing imagining some poor office drone's day when they read that.
Now, my answer. Guilty. I have used an improvised lube. It was not gravel and thumbtacks.
The next person thinks I should stop telling silly stories and "just answer the question, Claire!" (bonus points if you know what movie that quote is from)