Breakups with Your RP Partners

[Gidgy]

I posting this here to inform other peoples and to reminds myself when it happens to me and I forgets for a moment how awesomes I am.

Meeting people on Ecchi Dreams is a lot like dating, or at least dating in the poly world. New people show up all shiny and mysterious, and others been around long enough that they seem like family. Except in this case maybe you want to fuck all of them, just to see what it like. And that's at least part of what this place is for.

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Then something happen to make it go bad. Or nothing happen, it just die a slow fizzling death. Somebody you spent a lot of time getting to know and having hot nasty RP sex with then wants to go their own way.

How'd they go?

• They disappears, never to log on again, maybe they died or their fingers froze off and they can't types with their nose.
• They leaves all your conversations and ignores/blocks you without even saying why.
• They say why but you don't understand. It was really good, why didn't they think it was really good?
• They spit out some words but really it just a lie. They clearly found other people to play with that they like to play with more than you.
• They say why and it's not something you can change. They don't like your spelling, your wording, your kinks, your gender, your sex bits, how you look, your age.
• They say why and it's not something you want to change. They don't like your reply length, or the time it takes you to reply, or the types of RP you enjoy.

For the record, I have been here less than 6 weeks and I've had every one of the above happens to me. 

NONE OF THAT MATTERS.

I mean unless they give you a reason that you can and want to change and you think you should. Then it matters and pay attention, but for all the others, it doesn't.

Even though it doesn't matter, sometimes it still hurts. It feels like someone looked you over, took you for a test drive, and then brought you back and said no thanks. You weren't good enough for them. They wanted better, different, newer, older, whatever. It can hurt no matter the reasons, and it can hurt if there never were any reasons.

It hurts cause you put your energy, light, life, into people. This is a good thing. It's why we RP here and not just reads a smut novel or plays with some AI bot. People are fun and we invest ourselves into them. And sometimes it just didn't work out.

It easy to get offended when that happens. At least it's easy for me. I get angry, offended, hurt, maybe go through a little depression and self-loathing. Not the best of reactions, but it shows us we're human and that we did cares. Even if the other person didn't.

It also makes sense that other people leave. Of all the people you meet in Ecchi, here's how they are categorized with you (warning: fake statistics):

• 30% are trying out the site and will randomly poof at some point because they've moved on or found a new hobby/game/relationship
• 30% won't ever mesh with you do to gender, kinks, RP style, ability, etc
• 20% could mesh but they can't now because they're too busy with other RPs or other things in life
• 20% are possibles!!!

Now of those 20% possibles if you RP with them (more made up statistics):

• 10% will think you're incredibly amazing and will go into panic attacks if you don't reply fast enough because they want/need/love you.
• 50% will think you're quite the acceptable RP partner.
• 20% will think you're kinda meh.
• 10% will instantly think you're not a match and will regret ever starting to RP with you.

Based on the above, 90% of the people you RP with will at some point have reason to leave you. 

AND you'll have reason to leave 90% of the people you RP with for the same reasons.

If you finds enough of your 10 percenters to keep you busy, then you won't want the other 90% anyway! 

If someone opts out of your life or RP then it just means they weren't your amazing match and they figures it out faster than you did.

They did you a favors and saves you some time. Cause your match(es) wouldn't have left yous. So they weren't your match and now you both knows it. It not make you or them a bad persons. And everyone has a match(es) so if you not finded them yets, just gotta be patient. 

When peoples tell you you're not for them, don't try to convince them they're wrong -- help em pack! Give them every reason to stay but if they want to go, make leaving you easy. Cause they gotta get gone to make room for the right peoples!

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If you're the one who wants out of an RP relationship, then have the ovaries, balls, or both to just tell them. That ghosting stuff is lame!

If someone else left you, then love yourself anyway. It doesn't make you wrong or bad, you just weren't their person. And you tried and now you both know! Keep looking!

[Beelzubub4u]

Wow!! You capture it quite nicely. On the previous RP site I was on, experienced that a couple times where the story was really emerging, and poof, silence, and no response. 
 

I get the anonymous nature of this, but agree, it’s kinda like dating, so if it’s not what you want, just say so. Luckily I have a somewhat thick skin and move on, but it sucks when you thought you had this great interaction that was hot and heavy vanish without a clue. 
 

Tell me if I sucked and why, then maybe in the future it can work out better. 

[Novaer]

I posted this in a status recently but I figure it's worth posting here too:

RE: Ghosting

I've noticed that the term "ghosting" can mean different things to different people, and it's critical to understand the various perspectives it encompasses.

Imagine you're engaged in an online roleplay and your RP partner suddenly stops responding, even though they're frequently online. In such cases, there could be several reasons for their silence. They might be juggling multiple conversations and accidentally overlooked your message. Life can get hectic, and personal matters could be taking up their time. Alternatively, they may be grappling with writer's block and feel embarrassed about their inability to respond promptly.

However, if you are genuinely convinced that you're experiencing ghosting, there are steps you can take. It's important to address the issue constructively. One way to do this is by leaving a review on the other person's preferences page, providing an honest and balanced account of your experience. It's crucial to be fair in your assessment, highlighting both the positive and negative aspects of your interaction. Avoid sounding overly emotional or vindictive; such reviews carry more weight and credibility. Over time, these reviews will collectively raise awareness about the issue of ghosting within our community. As a result, people will become more informed and cautious about interacting with individuals who have a history of ghosting.

Even though the definition of ghosting can vary, it's essential to consider different perspectives. When dealing with potential ghosting in an RP or any online context, it's crucial to approach the situation in a fair and balanced manner and consider other possible reasons for the lack of response. If ghosting is confirmed, addressing the issue through well-thought-out reviews can contribute to a more transparent and respectful online community and a better EcchiDreams for all.

That said if someone goes offline and never comes back on, I don't personally consider this to be ghosting. There could be a myriad of reasons why this is, and in my experience it's really not any one thing.