personal thought Elena And Her Thoughts Out There

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Sun was bright outside. But the wind blowing rather strong for some reason. And cloud was sparse as far as my eye can see.

Best bet it will be stormy weather.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Don't remember this place has so much air conditioning.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Some dude just got called off because being thicc headed while also taking most insult when talking nicely. Oh the society! To boldly claim they're nice and friendly only to hurl insult to finish a conversation? Professionalism at its finest!

Edited February 1, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Why am i checking people album you ask? Why i even there in the first place is...

TO SEE PREFERENCE, LOOKS, AND PERSONALITY OF YOUR OC BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT THE ALBUM SECTION MADE FOR, DUH!

Edited February 23, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Yare yare daze...

What am i expect from Wednesday?

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Dear RPer over there...LMAO

Someone just leave bad review to someone else just because being ghosted...you know if i'm just as petty, you bet you'll see many one stars going on everyone preference sheet ever since day one i joined for that very reason. Yes, i had been ghosted too, so much that it almost a crime. The reason why i don't use that as reason to review alone, because i need more solid reason for one star review; at least three reason why. This is why i never one star someone as its too early to assume and not to mention how (duh!) idiotic that sounds, even though its clear they're not good at it (nor do i ever claim i'm best RPer ever either).

Everyone got life. You think their internet bill gonna pay by itself? You didn't wait that long, dimwit! As if your preference has much to say about yourself either!

If being cucked on RP rage you so much, maybe consider writing some erotica! This site allow such thing you know. 

Stale beer...

Edited March 2, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

I'm in the mood for root beer. Cold one even better. Canned one is fine too. Yeah, i drink those over cola. Its just that it wasn't sold too much on convenient store around here. They sold it, just not always.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Elena is old. Or at least getting it...

Yesterday is almost 12 hour non stop work for me. Not just work, even back at home too. At the office, i had to register another 200 data for database. only to have it edited and register again after i reach 123th data. It take hours because i don't just put name, but also their address and contact in full detail and even more so if they also live in 2 places (such case if the student live with other relatives houses instead their own to attend the school due to distance). At least its not as much as the bio but dang, ain't that a let down? At least the edited only demand me to input 100 data.

Then when i come back home, i saw one of my cat still lie down sickly. He's been like that for a week. I already take that cat to a vet, they said its just exhaustion as he already considered old by now (I adopt it around 2019, thrown away by someone in a box, yeah sounds unreal but it is what it is). At least it still respond to a call but he eat slowly to the point his food got stolen by my other cat. Rude youngster! But It become even longer day...

When i found out he passed away around sunset...

I remember it still look and respond to my call and even pet him for a minutes. It was 2 PM at the time. What make this longer day? He pass away in my room, lying down on the corner where there's cramped but still spacious enough for a cat to lie down. Its baffling me and quite a shocker too. I saw it still sitting in loaf position, around 6 PM, it lie still, unmoved, its eyes look up, no breathing or beating heart. 

I already had long day at work, things a mess in there. But to have my day ended like this? Is just total smack to the face. So i cried. Once i calm down, i proceed on finding place to bury him with my father help. It wreck me so much that i end up fell asleep early than usual hour. I'm not even sure i can write a thing properly after what happened. But i guess i just seek a distraction from the yesterday unfortunate event.

I'll be fine. You know i always do.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Oh i'm a mess

I thought about editing my reply to my RP partner because i get the good idea. But turn out i can't because the previous reply i sent is already setting up everything and would be very weird if i edit that out. Oh well, its not fatal mistake but...

The feeling of embarrassment for the false alarm is TOO MUCH TO BEAR!

[Elena Ichinomiya]

I'm a complete idiot!

So...today is very grand for me. Not only my day stretched so much it hurt, the weather gone banana almost all day, and then, i got banned from ED! Yes, i got banned like a slap to the face! However!

I think i kind of see why i got banned temporary. Well, here's the summary, not that complicated i assure you. So i just minding my day, then proceed on login on ED, only to realize i was slapped with register page instead the home page which is nonsense. Turn out i saw the email that currently used on my Chrome browser is not the one i use for my ED account. And i know full well what its written on ToS section 9 about second account. But me being a buffoon, instead hitting cancel, i force ED to, wait for it, logout instead cancelling it. Keep in mind those account isn't even made and yet ED already give you sign out button which is very hilarious on the side. Perhaps i should report that to admin because why on earth you give a logout button on integrated register page? 

Anyway, ED didn't respond when i click on that logout button as it only make the page refreshing. That is until i saw the nice cancel button at the bottom. Silly me! So i press it and then proceed on login as usual...only to be slapped with "banned" screen which is really damp my already long day! What on earth!?

"Elena! You should report that to admin immediately on their Discord!" you may said. But here's the thing. If you're boot out from ED, be it banned or deactivate, congrats, you'll get booted out from their server too because you're no longer part of the community whatsoever which make sense to me, but it give me trouble.

1. I don't add ANY admin as friend in the first place because i usually contact them on ED discord server and suggestion forum on ED directly which is why i find it unnecessary.
2. I didn't know for a fact you'll still booted out from ED server even if your account got false positive ban instead actual ban so i'm pretty much baffled seeing i'm outside boundary of any admin help.
3. I don't know ED email address to make appeal properly because as far as i know, ED don't have one.
4. For whatever the reason, the "Contact Us" button on the banned screen isn't functioning as it led to "page take too long to load" screen instantly which confuse me. But it get even better...
5. Because found the working "Contact Us" feature is sitting at the login page at the bottom. No, you won't find that right away there. Because you have to click at the help and support link first (clear browser history data in case you still stuck on banned screen to get yourself out to login screen by revisiting ED site again afterward) and then hit contact us. Yes, i had to go through guessing game to find working "Contact Us" button who at least, give you a message that your complaint has been sent instead a 404 page. Admin, please fix this one...

All that said though, here's what i think what happen to my account. After contacting @Reven, @maid lover, @Yuuto Hiroshige on DIscord, they told me and even show me that my account wasn't banned. Its still active, it just lock me away from accessing it for some reason. That moment, i remember when the last time i experience this issue. On one of online game who block me for a day because they think i'm bot after attempting many login. And from that alone, i quickly draw conclusion that the site isn't banning me; it just trying to warn me that i login like a bot and want me to chill which is why i got such ban to stop me from confusing the system. At least ED is nice enough because most ban like this can last for day or even a week! Imagine the anxiety! (Turn out the system claim i banned because i "create" double account as admin PM said)

At least i got a good laugh with @Moon Hound Hati when we realize i can login on ED again. 

Whoever the admin who manage to catch the wind of my slip, thanks for helping out. And don't worry, it won't happen again. As for the person i mention...i owe you big one. I know some of you might ask "What the hell?". Just know that you just help ease the burden out of my mind.

Well...all in all, this is just accident. Still, its kind of funny because lately i was wondering what does the banned dreamer would see in their profile and think Tem or Nep can show me the screenshot. Here i am receiving real (temporary) ban and got real scare! 

Oh and i'll join ED discord again later. See you there yes?

Edited March 17, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

If you want to be hero, then...

1. Free people from the shackle of slavery
2. Took care of an orphan (animal included)

But if its too much, then just...

       3. Comfort those whose heart are in sorrow

See? You don't need to dream to be a hero. You already part of it since long time.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Have i ever told you...

Back in 1998, i almost died when there's discrimination against Chinese people at the time of my president coup? When all i had is just Chinese look about me, yet people still want me dead? My family too.

I was 3 years old.

What happen on my region today remind me of that day. Of course i hope it doesn't end up as worst. 7 college student died by police brutality. Many mixed Chinese woman raped and killed, some so grotesque that even news only report it through newspaper only. Many father going out for work, never return. Many brother and sister going to school, coming back days later in bruise if not dying state. 

I was 3 years old.

I was 3 years old.

My mother cling to me tight every night, no lights were on inside and outside to get people attention. We own small shop. Every night, we hear people banging the iron bars along with angry shout. I don't know why they even shouting. But i remember my mom muffle my mouth while my big sis cling to my dad. But not even my father want to deal with them. Or call police knowing they don't want to die by angry mob. They want to raid our shop due to economy crisis. Perhaps our house too. As i getting older, i think they want to get us too.

I was 3 years old.

And i still remember the tension. I didn't tell my parent until now. That it scared me when i almost died after got hit and run when playing on the streets with the neighbor kids. I don't need to say what happen after that and why. I remember the sharp pain on my left shoulder where i got hit by those car. Can't remember if i was bleeding either as i was crying so hard, i didn't pay attention. I was...

3 years old...

I should be attending a pre-school. I was rather independent that time. I always go home by myself since it was close distance to my home. Not once or twice, people with a bike come by offering me a ride, saying they're my father friend which i could say they are since they frequent my mother shop to buy cigar. But i was shy so i went silent. At the same time, my dad come home every 12 PM just so he can pick me and my sister up after school and after that, he goes back to his office and come home around 5PM. I was confused, why he bother to have such odd break time? His office is quiet far you know. It was later when i found out those people who try to sway me to come with them...is a kidnapper. 

I was 3 years old.

1998. Two days after my birthday. I live in fear.

And i live on. TV and newspaper never stop mentioning brutality. It burn inside my head even more when those media, didn't even censor the victim body. Shot, stabbed, beaten up, strangled, impaled...i saw it all. Its more grotesque but i don't want to disgust you guys. Just know that when this happen that year...

I was 3 years old.

And you think 3 years old are oblivious. You're dead wrong.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

I honestly don't know why. When my RP partner decide to flip off because of their own stupidity like blaming me for ruining the story when its clearly they told me what i should do/react...

I imagine them not as angry little runt. But instead i picture them as angry folks who shout around...while breakdance. 

"GAH! YOU RUIN MY PLAN!" they said...

And i smile like what Nick just do. Either i smile at the picture that run in my head, that runt attitude, or i just don't know what the freak did i just thinking...

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Before you run off, let me give disclaimer. I never mention an ounce that my preference sheet is gold. I took inspiration from how admin do it and copy it so there's that. Now onto the topic...

I keep talking about people preference sheet. Because i felt it justified to remind them the obvious rule and stuff. Look, if they run loose making another new one preference sheet rather than hitting those edit button, it only annoy me as i fear it would cause a bad habit but at least this is not such headache to get by. But what really make me shake my head and doubt people preference, is when the person just make another reference just because it was review bombed aka running away after the dumpster fire they cause. Look, you got that attitude about you and you're the one to blame for that. I understand how bad it is being 1 star and stuff, but if it wasn't followed up by a proof that you're changed person from that 1 star person back in the day, or simply prove it to others that you're actually good RPer; just so happen you meet with the bad apple, you just make another septic tank for people to dump on. You add another backpain on already existing neck pain. 

Sure you can say "You don't tell me what to do! This is gyah gyah of speech!" something, but have you ever look the headline rules above the Preference Sheet page? No that's not my writing, i'm not admin. That thing up there, is why i felt myself justified to talk about this even if it gonna make me such a pain. And true to that, i see why they enforce that. But hey, people had their reason, right?

Then come another issue where i can't get a grasp upon. Some dreamer said ED preference sheet is lackluster. I gotta admit that compared to my wacky RP source, ED is underwhelmingly lacking despite the well-managed site. However what i can't get my head around of is, how lazy the said dreamer are to add the detail, and blame the site for it. The moment when i see it, i can't help but say, "Folks! Those additional detail form exist for something you know!". Look, i don't know how F-List do their thing since they always become preference sheet for most, i can't say much because it was blocked in my region (nor do i want to pay visit anyway knowing those place can be a cesspool in a seconds). But to expect similar feature from the other site like ED is something you should never even think of. Every site carry their thing on their own way. You know the other RP site i joined don't even have selection; you have to type everything yourself! In fact, ED is generous enough to have the additional information form to fill the gap in case some detail of your favorite kink seems vague and what not. Sure ED don't have "My Fave/Average/No-No" category, but because of that problem, you got additional information form to fill those detail! At least ED has some alternative for people to add the detail themselves. Look, if the stuff you want doesn't deliver, find a way to get it done.

And i can't really say the problem end when i found some preference sheet is so openly condescending other kink just because they could in their preference additional information. Yes they could do that, its their freedom, but the consequence is like expecting no one blame you after burning people house. I won't say who the dreamer is but the fact that they point out their disgust toward certain kink, while its okay if its DM at least, is not very bright idea to expose yourself in community. Look, i had highly turn-off with BDSM, Sci-Fi genre, and hypnotize but even so, i didn't call out those people who like those stuff, let alone saying they are bad folks. Had i been saying that on my preference sheet, you bet you'll see deactivate tag on my name weeks later as i just openly discourage people, making them think they would end up as my punching bag just because they like something that i don't like, resulting in paltry amount of RP. 

Quote

Imagine seeing my RP preference sheet, and then you found your favorite kink mentioned by me saying in the additional information as no-no, but instead saying "i don't like it because its my turn off kink/not used to it/don't know about it" then call it a day, instead i saying "I hate this kink, those who like it better don't RP with me; go fuck yourself somewhere else". Does that sounds okay to you? Even if the said kink is not your favorite whatsoever, it already give impression that i am an easily agitated and no-BS taker kind of RPer. That doesn't look good in every angle let alone in a long run.

I don't get it this kind of RPer really. Those fellow wondering why they get less RP despite the great idea which baffle me how oblivious they are. I do admit that person had good idea, but i don't RP those idea with them because it doesn't click with me for long run. But seeing how they treat themselves, i say again, treat themselves without much care and had the guts to wonder why no one take interest to RP with them with those call out...i think i just avoid the bombshell back there.

Let me ask the question. Where is the first impression you get the most about your RP partner? To me, its their preference sheet because it define the people behind the screen attitude how they conduct themselves. Dreamer can be sweet on their intro, or BS around in their status like i do. But when it come to preference sheet, they had to be themselves truly. 

[Elena Ichinomiya]

So just like everyone else, me and my big sis agree on canceling our Netflix subscription. 

Not because of the trend or something. Or because certain crappy idea of a movie back in 2018-19 either. But because we find ourselves watching something else than Netflix. You know how wonky their subscription price is. Even Disney know what make subscription works without nudging people nerve too much. Additional price for 1080p? Even more for 4K? Boy, i get if its for 4K but why they cockblock the stream to 480p on basic subscription? You know these days TV are. If its not 720p, things get little bit hairy to see and that's the issue i had with Netflix. The base price alone make me consider, now i had to dig more for watchable quality?

And then comes the library. You might already tell so much movie and shows are not available in my region but i assure you, our censorship on foreign media ain't reaching those mad level yet so LGBT show sometimes appear. But that's not the issue here. The numbers of interesting show itself is pretty much little to nothing. Even with VPN, i still find myself browsing the library than watching thing. You don't subscribe streaming service for window shopping!

What internet say about Netflix, i could say its pretty much true. They had outrageous number of original movie that as horrible as FTV in my region (while its not that extreme, i find it similarly laughable). I force myself to watch not just one but three of it. Even if the movie genre is my favorite, i never find myself absorbed at all. And like i said, i force myself because there is literally NOTHING interesting that catch my interest against my better judgement. I really can't say what Netflix trying to appeal here. At first i thought they were just putting original movie because they can and for profit. But seeing how much of a shovelware movie we got, i don't know where this going. 

Just get this, instead releasing trending genre of a movie that fan would have reason to flock over Netflix, they release sequel of worst original movie which suffice to say, similarly worse than the prequel release. That doesn't sounds good.

Something tell me Netflix want to...flex on movie studio that they can make movie at moderate budget. But instead putting some quality and time to make any movie and shows at least decent and watchable, they just throw more money and hoping that would help the production which not only contradict their intention, but also not helping the case. Its like an overcrowded hospital where you should expand the hospital, you decide its better to raise every doctor salary instead in hope the Doctors could grow six hand to help people recover faster.

Let's look back years ago. They had source material for Death Note and lots of money due to increasing sale of their streaming service, did they follow the said material? And then we got those Cuties movie, did they block it? Quality control is not part of their service, and i'm concerned from that day onward. 

Look, me and my big sis didn't cancel Netflix because of common cancel culture reason about Netflix. I personally against cancel culture unless its proven as harmful culture. Me and my big sis cancel it, because there's literally nothing interesting in their library at all. In fact, my big sis asked me just yesterday if we should subscribe to Disney+ next month seeing they had IDR currency there and their subscription wasn't so choking, along with the stream quality price. Every shows Netflix had, its repetitive reality shows and game shows with repetitive trope and script; just with different angle. Every movie they had, its just either bad or meh just from the cover; and we were right. And their category? Extremely limited. Their search feature? Worst. You heard how their anime category were mismanaged. You might consider yourself lucky to find anime at all. And even if you did, i would bet its still stuck on their early season when the actual series is already way ahead. Only to be announced for update years later. 

If you did subscribe to Netflix and liking it, i'm happy for you. But my case with Netflix is similar like everyone else. The streaming quality of Netflix is so mixed. Their library mismanaged. They can't tell who they try to appeal. Their category were lackluster. Their original series is pretty much confusing mess. Maybe my parent would like it if they understand english (as far as i know, Indonesian language isn't always available for some shows). As for me and my big sis, we decide to migrate.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

 

-This record has been deleted. Let there be panic-

Edited June 6, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya
Not worth it

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Sometime i felt like i didn't do well on every reply. I wish i can be as good as people who RP in club or public. I mean it. Even if its just one paragraph reply each (at least three sentence), the way they move their story kind of make me envy. 

The only source of comfort that drive me to RP up to this day is, if nobody complaint, that mean you doing good. After all, if its not broken, don't fix it. Should i keep it up?

[Elena Ichinomiya]

Yesterday was somewhat unpleasant. Though it didn't ruin my day as a whole, but still a crappy event regardless.

You see, there's this public health center a few distance from my home. I sometime pass by whenever i looking for breakfast. And yesterday was no difference. Until it wasn't. 

Because when i pass by the said instance, people were gathering outside. I thought its a queue for vaccine or booster but nope. Turn out its a government official who run an inspection for the said public center. I was wondering why they even bother because as far as i know, most government activity are not that active around weekend. You thought there's abuse? Verbally so but nothing more. There's lot of people watching the outburst as the official was shouting to the point i can hear it from where i'm at.

"You work here right!? You know where and what the hell you working as!? A medical staff!" someone shouted. I ask around what's going on and the reason is so screwed beyond believe. Even you as someone who didn't care about politic and perhaps a healthcare system would think the same. Say, what do you think about public health center who closed their service at 5 PM...include their emergency department? Yeah. That's where the real crap is. There's a mix up between the government and this public health center branch. The official did admit they send the order about the operational hour which applies to every service but NOT include their emergency department. I say again, NOT include their emergency department. Yet this public health center fail miserably to get that right. I thought its the official blunder but no, its the public health center itself who screw up. Because there's report of this one poor folk who got caught in accident, were rejected to be admitted by them for "operational hour reason" even though they got a...you know, EMERGENCY DEPARTMENT!

And that report alone cause the sudden investigation to launch. They bring it upon themselves. Because as far as i know, every public health center emergency department MUST HAVE 4 people (at minimum) on stand by and active 24 hours. This is a standard from government which by itself is something to take note if you decide to screw around. Though it might varied depend on the size of the health center itself.

I don't know the full detail is but i hear various words shouted by official who really lost it. "You just follow this crap even when you know its wrong!? Is everyone here a psycho!? Were you guys gonna refuse to treat a women giving birth because its past 5 PM!? You gonna let people die bleeding out because they come at 6 PM!? Do you guys work here for the people or what!? Where do you think those salary come from!? If you can't do your job then resign for good! If you want to work for money sake then work at the retail store! Don't make this bullshit!"

The last words said from the official however, break the silent into panic as the official openly declare...

"Clear your table before next Monday. All of you!". Think that official just bluffing? Nope, they tear the service and permission of operation letter right to their face. They ask every single staff to give up their name tag for starter and literally, at 9 AM, everyone was sent home. Ironic considering they love their early leave from work hour now biting them back. As the (former) staff wallow in their mistake outside (i don't have a heart to see their face but i hear a sobbing), the official put some sort of police line at the door.

Yeah, its not one or two people at fault here. But the whole instance. You think they did this BS because they're understaffed? Sorry to say world isn't that predictable. Because thing is, they had the guts to make a petition which EVERY STAFF were agree with their own CONSENT, along with their signature and stamp to close every service at 5 PM include their emergency department even though there's no such order. I say again, the official only announce their change of operational public service hour EXCEPT its emergency department; it was left untouched. They (the health center staff) had the ball to do that because their superior were protecting them which is not present at the time...boy, those WhatsApp group chat gonna be a headache!

My personal thought about this? Its a mess. Me as substitute teacher did teach the kids the definition of Emergency Department and why they were referred as such. Even i learn those definition since i'm a 10 years old and still remember their purpose and why it has to be that way!

"Get a load of this bull. We know how annoying it is to be refused from any public service because the staff is on lunch break time despite the fact that we know its a legit reason. A small petty reason alone could annoy people, and here they are taking whole leap to the cliff"
(Working at government instance is no joke matter. Even me who only work as a low tier substitute teacher at public school have to be cautious to make sure i didn't mess up or at least keep the damage minimum. Big or small, it won't matter. If you mess up big and got kicked, you're very lucky to snatch another job; with decent pay if i might add)

[Elena Ichinomiya]

My poor friend...

He lost both his parent due to plague. I was wondering why he splurge so much money when he move house. Honestly it look like pricy house but since it was furnished house instead of a rent, it can't be that bad. Mind you, he's a teacher, your basic run-on-the-mill teacher. Our salary is pretty much enough to feed family but to buy such luxury is pretty much of a stretch. Even more so if you work same as my field. But despite my critical mind, even i would fail to see the bigger picture. When he post a status which translate from Indonesian, he said...

"Bought a nice house. Just got the cash from the government which should be my parent salary after their retirement. But they already gone. I'm technically rich now. i should be happy but what good is a big house if its just your son live here? Wish you both were here..."

I never thought there will be a day where i want to run back to my parent house just to hug them. You never appreciate a thing until you remember it would go away. Wednesday never fail to surprise me.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

So...marvel new superheroes...

Its an old topic years ago but my word i can't get over it due to how bad it was. Remember the heroes which consist of SJW and anti-SJW huddled in one universe? Yeah that one. I don't get it but after i read each of heroes bio back in the day...it really make me wanna ask if the whole Marvel comics just desperate for an idea or plainly losing a spin-the-bottle game from other comic publisher or something to greenlit this idea. If there's anything that would stop me from reading comic, this is it. Look, i give a damn to any comic hero character that i like, alright? If the hero was too much for me, i just go meh about it and goes on with my day, but if it was so bad to the point even the fans don't acknowledge them and the studio itself ashamed to publicize it to larger masses out of fear of backlash, i think that's not something that i should read about let alone get interested.

Was those comic was intented to be satire of the internet? Was Deviantart fanfic writer, Twitter butthurt and Marvel having threesome or something? 

This new heroes series might be the first time where all people are encouraged to cheer on...the villain!

Edited June 22, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

OOC message can roughly translate as a message that keep the RP going. Then we make it stop going.

Edited June 25, 2022 by Elena Ichinomiya

[Elena Ichinomiya]

I'm not happy with my current flow in RP right now...i could do better...

[Elena Ichinomiya]

"Oh you looking for female RP partner! You must be asking for noods next! Hooh! Hooh! Hooh!"

That kind of line is pretty much of a joke that's for sure. I get it, i understand. When RPer openly said what they prefer for partner, things can get weird or downright wrong. I swear to anything that holy, it will never get right when internet is so full of white knight who don't even know where they point their spear at. Sometime it was justified, but this time, i don't see any.

You see, i had pretty much experience with various RP partner who is alright, skilled, open minded, to the downright weird, rude, and extraordinarily random. This one, is no different. Imagine having yourself encouraged to show your idea to the world then get cussed by it when all you did is something written by the book. Imagine if you were told to use a toilet by sit down, and then people cuss at you for making its seat warm. Yes, this topic is pretty much that. Weird analogy, but you get what i mean.

So this fella seems had it rough by expressing that they want female RP partner which also female IRL. Now that alone might be quite unsettling but this is where i draw the line. You might think that there's no difference RPing with people with something in the lowest middle part of their body, or something between your legs if you want to go that way. But thing is, there is a different result. I find myself RPing with male RP partner, they want more action happen in the story, lewd or not. But when i'm going with female RP partner, the emotional attachment in the story seems to be the one that appeal to them, lewd or not. Now i'm not saying every male/female RP are the same, this is just my experience, don't get me wrong, i had a few who break this expectation too so this isn't 100% foolproof.

The thing that make me wince is when the community decide to talk him out of it in the snide manner that doesn't even justified let alone funny. Look, i already see how the event turn out before making this post so don't flaunt it on me because the said fella are nice and smart enough to link the said problematic thread, unlike dreamer who link their profile page to their preference sheet instead the actual sheet.

You might think i BS around but i don't think such course of action is good either. Look, that fella just openly state what he prefer in their RP, don't we all do that? I don't see there's a standard banner saying that you shall not announce who you should RP with. I get it if you want to share your view but does it have to be that way? With all the worst case scenario that doesn't even happen yet or occurred? That sude just announcing, that's it. No wrong doing or bad screeching record happen. But then, all hell break loose.

People said this, people said that, that thread become a vessel for people who see someone RPing with specific preference of their gender. I myself don't see that as problem because i'm RPing with someone who openly admit it to me that they only RP with woman character who also IRL woman. So you know what? I already made the deal with the devil! And then i'm sure someone would say "But Elena! You must be a dude behind the screen!". To those who said that to me, screw you, people can lie on their profile for all i care and off with it way too many time for me to care. In fact if that dude were off the hook, i don't think he would get legit 100% female RP partner and goes on having RP with them as long as his partner remain quiet about their identity. That's the basic.

If you said "That kind of dude would pose problem if let go!". Again, screw you and your Watson. The question here is, where is the fault? Who was the victim? Is there any report that he cause a trouble for female dreamer? Why crusading someone who did something by the book when we all did that? If you really crusade on people who has such preference, then i was legit able to crusade on people who RP with those who like my no-no kink. See? Don't feel like to see that happen do you? Nor i did.

I admit that people who openly announce their preference like that is unsettling. I get it that some of you might fear the worst. I get it if you had trauma RPing with person and give the piece of mind to them about you. But for the love of anything that holy, does that guy even do any damage to the community yet? Looking back again, this isn't something i want to put my hands on when i usually do.

Back then i cuss at certain panty snatcher guy because he is indeed proven to be an arse and i understand community dislike toward him because it was right-to-the-face proven true. And i did get my hand dirty when a dreamer got harassed on their profile because the said fella is indeed a worst kind of member of community. But this one? He just register yesterday. No stain, no bad record, not involved in any shady activity or something, yet the community just...what?

No people, that's not funny. And i don't think such action is ever funny. If you want to put people to the stake, you have to get a hold of legit reason why instead of thin air assessment or carry your traumatic experience to the platter. Keep in mind there's many dreamer with extreme kink as their favorite but they can be pretty much cool folks to hang around with at the end of the day. I don't see why this dude has any difference unless he prove himself otherwise. And i also did read his latest thread that he question if its wrong to ask for specific RP partner, i personally said there's no problem. The problem is how he gonna carry on his words on keeping thing civil despite the request; can he carry on without drama, or hit bump along the way. Sure at the end he end up lashing out uncontrollably. But who's fault was that? That's why i cuss at the community right now instead of the guy because how ridiculous things get. 

All thing considered, if there's no cold hard prove that he's in for a cyber date or anything that put the main focus of the community sidetracked, shut up and go back replying to your RP that you didn't reply yet since month ago. To anyone who got involved with that fiasco, all i can say is congratulation, you just gatekeep people from joining EcchiDreams. 

[Elena Ichinomiya]

My word, i'm getting bitter about the community lately. This might be a time to cooldown a bit or else i start something. Gotta say though, i had reason for the foul mood even more so after last week. But you guys don't come here to hear such sob story but some sexy stuff and i get that. I won't blame you, this site are made for that. Besides...

What can you do about it? Heck, you might had even more worse day than me so i can't bemoan much about it and make yours sounds small which is enough offense already. Some problem, are not meant for stranger ears. This is one of it.

And you think i'm insensitive for not sending encouraging message when people are down? Well if its something that i never experience before, i can't share the pain to tell them what's up. Last thing you want is people slide in and being friendly to you when they don't even know what the heck they talking about and start the conversation with "I understand that" or "I feel you there", and goes on something that doesn't concern you.

See? Don't like reading such message do you? That's why i need this cooldown. I won't go as far saying this is toxic community, that's rather overkill. I would rather say that the value of this site to me begin to wane. I might call it quit when i find absolute reason to quit. 

It's okay, there's plenty of fish on the ocean. Losing one person usually make up for thousands that are better. Or worse.

[Elena Ichinomiya]

I'm not happy with my reply pace, won't lie, it annoy me to no end. I don't suffer burnout or anything, just plain busy. But thing is, while i can just take a break from RPing, i was left with nothing else to do. After all, i join the community for doing something different than just browsing youtube until i got wrinkle all over my toes. You know how much i live with internet so much that even the biggest meme site would bore me, or any news outlet become a liar nest if not sensationalist BS camp? Yeah, i already reach that level of boredom on the internet. But hey, internet isn't just filled with meme and news of an old buster right? That's why i'm here.

To be honest with you, i don't even know why i register when i also had this fanfic site i'm still active to this day. Guess i am that bored with the internet. 

Don't start now, i'm pretty much like to go outside breathing air too. Whatever cheap insult you got about being in the basement too long, even as a joke, keep it to yourself.