Anyone else feel weirdly conflicted?

[highoctagon]

I feel like there's a strange thing going on with me where I'll get turned on by something and be super into it, but when I think about it happening to me or to someone I know, it becomes undesirable. For example, there's a clear conflict between having a nice partner who is loyal to you, and having a partner who is more than willing to fuck anything that moves. It almost feels like those two are mutually exclusive, and that may be the case, but that's just one example of how it feels weirdly conflicting. Do you want a partner that is this way or the other? You can't have both it feels. 

Just wondering if anyone else is struggling with these strange conflicts of interest outside of just being kinky/horny.

[Pixel]

I think everyone flip flops from time to time.

Some people like things simple.

Personally, I'm a romantic. I want to give everything that I am to a special person and have that given in return, I want to share my life with someone that I can't bear to live without. 

Sometimes I think about slipping back into my slut phase. But then I remember how empty it felt and I snap out of it. 

You just gotta do you. Vibe with what you feel so you can really figure yourself out.

[highoctagon]

8 minutes ago, Pixel said:

I think everyone flip flops from time to time.

Some people like things simple.

Personally, I'm a romantic. I want to give everything that I am to a special person and have that given in return, I want to share my life with someone that I can't bear to live without. 

Sometimes I think about slipping back into my slut phase. But then I remember how empty it felt and I snap out of it. 

You just gotta do you. Vibe with what you feel so you can really figure yourself out.

I feel like when push comes to shove, I'm pretty steadfast in what I'm willing to put up with but I feel like there's a level of discomfort that comes along with understanding what you stick with IRL and what you find yourself being aroused by. I think that dichotomy is a bit unpleasant for me. 

I'm much the same as you in regards to being a romantic, but I think the paraphilia outside of what I want IRL is causing some level of cognitive dissonance that I'm just wondering if other people feel. 

To help verbalize it a little better, it feels almost hypocritical for me to want and pursue a pure monogamous, loving relationship that I can dedicate myself to but also be turned on by things outside of that scope. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else is feeling a level of discomfort from that hypocrisy or if I'm just not drawing the line well enough mentally.

[Pixel]

It's human to be turned on by things that are taboo to us, even if they're things that we would never actually do. The fantasy is the fun of it. We all have kind of messed up minds sometimes, at least when it comes to our personal morals. There's nothing wrong with having a fantasy about a kink, just stay true to yourself and you're gonna be fine.

 

[Cute_Bro]

If anything, that kind of shows you're still human. As Pixel has explained before, as humans we are kind of intrigued by the taboo. What we aren't allowed to do, we are curious about. Of course, rps and the such are meant as a way to explore those taboo things in a controlled, fictional scenario. The fact that you feeling weird and maybe even disgusted if whatever you're into at the time actually happened to someone you know, or something you see on the news, is not only ok, it shows that you can separate the fictional from the real, the IC from the OOC, and that I would say is something to be proud of. A respectable human, and a safe rper I'd say. So I wouldn't feel concerned that you have that conflicting feeling sometimes. 

 

[Gangsta Moll Deactivated]

Yes, my sexual fantasies go way beyond what I feel would be safe in real life: but I do feel drawn to think about experimenting with them. So far I have always got cold feet, and in a way been glad if it, but there is a tension as you say.