Blowjobs

[IsabellaRose]

It should come as no surprise that I'm a fan of giving oral sex to men. It's something of a skill, perhaps even a bit of innate talent, to be able to do it well. It's obviously more enjoyable for the man, but there's a certain sense of satisfaction and even arousal for the woman, too. I recently posted a couple status updates about a woman who was driven by desperate carnal desire and another about a woman who used a blowjob to get in with a guy and get him to buy her things. I have a couple other versions I've been working on - the inexperienced first timer, the old professional prostitute, and I might even do one about being forced against her will.

I've been thinking about it a lot lately, mostly because I'm in the best relationship I've ever had but it's with a woman and this isn't a thing we can do. I was going to post a question as a status, but I thought this might be a more appropriate forum, and being here, I can ask a lot more questions and hopefully learn a lot more. Plus I might get to hear some great blowjob stories and maybe get a little bit excited.

So, without further ado, I have questions for the recipients of blowjobs among you. Answer as many or as few as you like.

Her Experience

1. Do you think about whether she's actually enjoying it, or does it not cross your mind in the moment?
2. Have you ever asked a woman honestly what it feels like from her side? Would you want to know?
3. Can you tell the difference between a performed moan and a real one? Does it matter?
4. Have you ever been with a woman who clearly didn't want to be doing it but did it anyway? Did that register? Did it change anything?
5. Do you think most women genuinely enjoy giving head, or do you suspect they're performing more than they let on?

Power

1. What goes through your head when you're standing over a woman on her knees about to give you head?
2. Do you feel powerful? Is the power part of the pleasure?
3. Have you ever put your hands on her head? What were you thinking about when you did?
4. Has a woman ever told you to stop or slow down during one? How did you react?
5. Do you think about the vulnerability of her position: on her knees, mouth full, unable to speak?

Transactional

1. Have you ever felt like a blowjob was something you were owed?
2. Have you ever been more generous, giving gifts, attention, or even commitment, after a woman gave you particularly good head?
3. Do you think there's a connection between how good the head was and how you treat a woman afterward?
4. Would you break up with a woman who refused to give blowjobs? Would it be a dealbreaker?

Finishing

1. Do you prefer to finish in her mouth? Why?
2. Does swallowing matter to you? What do you think it means to her?
3. Have you ever thought about what it actually tastes and feels like for her to swallow?
4. Has a woman ever spit it out? How did you feel about it?
5. Do you prefer to finish on her face or body? What's the appeal?

Real vs. Performance

1. What made the best blowjob you've ever had the best? 
2. Was it the physical sensation, or was it something else, like the way she looked at you, the things she said, how she made you feel?
3. Have you ever had a technically skilled blowjob that wasn't as good? What was missing?
4. How much of the pleasure is physical versus psychological?
5. Do you need to feel like she wants it for it to be good?

Comparison

1. Do you rank the women you've been with by how good they were at this?
2. Have you ever told your friends about a specific blowjob? What did you say?
3. Do you think blowjobs are more intimate than intercourse or less?
4. Have you ever had a blowjob that made you fall for someone? Or fall out of love with someone?

First Time

1. Do you remember your first blowjob? What did it feel like?
2. Did you know what to expect?
3. Were you surprised by anything: the warmth, the wetness, the sight of it?
4. Did you feel guilty afterward? Grateful? Both?

Discomfort and Degradation

1. Have you ever held a woman's head down longer than she wanted?
2. Have you ever ignored signs that she was uncomfortable?
3. Have you ever thought about it afterward and felt like you took something?
4. If you could be on your knees in front of someone with their hands on your head, would you want to know what it feels like?
5. Do you think the act is inherently degrading to women?

 

[Blacking Your GF]

Oh, man. There's a lot to cover here. I've "only" been with three women in my life but I'll try to go over all of these since it's an interesting topic.

Her Experience

1. It does. I want her to enjoy it.
2. I haven't asked or imagined it from her side.
3. I think so? A real moan is usually quieter and more subtle. It matters as far as me wanting her enjoyment to be authentic.
4. Kind of but I think there's a difference between not wanting to do it at all and deciding to prioritize your partner's pleasure over your own comfort for a while.
5. I think oral sex in general is more pleasant for the receiver than the giver. The giver might not get much physical pleasure from it but there is always the satisfaction and validation of knowing you got your partner off.

Power

1. Mostly just that she looks pretty on her knees and I'm about to nut.
2. Fa sho', fa sho'. A good blowjob can make a man feel like a king.
3. Yeah. I usually hold the hair back when I put my hands on a woman's head. I think about the quality of her hair, taking control, dominating, deciding the depth and tempo, and drawing out those wet squelchy throat sounds. Seeing the tears and expressions on her face make it feel a bit abusive at times but then I think nah, it can't be abuse if she likes it.
4. Through tapout, yes. I just let go, give her some time to breathe and ask if she's cool.
5. Yeah, I appreciate it as a vulnerable position to be in and try to be respectful of it.

Transactional

1. Not outright but it is implied to be part of the arrangement.
2. Nah. She doesn't have to be particularly good on her knees. I firmly believe that a woman's head game doesn't actually matter much because you can always teach a girl that fucks with you. What matters more is frequent enthusiastic sex which can't be taught. That goes a long way with me when it comes to gifts, dates and commitment.
3. Not at all. Skill in bed is very far down the list of qualities I value in a woman. The gesture, enthusiasm and effort to please are sufficient.
4. Not if there is attraction and vibe and the normal sex is enthusiastic and willing. However, it would become a dealbreaker if it came to light that gave head to an ex.

Finishing

1. I'm 50/50 on finishing in her mouth and finishing on her face. There are benefits to both. See below.
2. Swallowing matters. It's polite and proof of enthusiasm/willingness to please. From her perspective, it's probably an act of total acceptance and submission.
3. Based on what I've heard, I imagine it's salty and bitter. Probably slimy as well.
4. No, but my first gf gagged a bit sometimes. I appreciated her perseverance, hah.
5. Face. I've always been an admirer of female prettiness and the act itself is the ultimate form of making my mark and I guess you could say claiming her.

Real vs. Performance

1. The way that she would mix it up to keep things fresh instead of doing one repetitive motion.
2. Total comfort for both of us, enthusiasm from her, teasing, kissing, licking, smiling, spitting, running her lips along the shaft, sucking, eye contact, dirty talk, slapping the shaft on her face and tongue, including the balls, deepthroating, tears, use of hands and mouth, cock worship and generally making me feel like a king.
3. Yeah, I was with a chick that gave great head but I couldn't be myself with her. Felt like I had to perform a caricature of masculinity.
4. You know what? I'd actually say it's mainly psychological. The pleasure aspect can be achieved with your hand but the psychology of being with someone you vibe with and find attractive makes it far better.
5. I prefer for her to want it but I greatly appreciate if she's prioritizing my pleasure over her own comfort as long as it's willing obviously.

Comparison

1. I guess you could say so but a woman having greater blowjob skill doesn't necessarily mean I will prefer having sex with her and it definitely doesn't mean I prefer her as a person or in a relationship.
2. No lol. When did it become cool to kiss and tell?
3. Slightly less. Intercourse can involve kissing, closer face-to-face eye contact and even pregnancy.
4. No. I try not to catch feelings but the times when I have fallen for someone, it was mainly due to looks and vibe.

First Time

1. Yeah, I remember thinking she was a bit clumsy but it was pleasant overall. I gave some feedback and I nutted in the end.
2. More or less, yeah.
3. Not much other than the amount of teaching I would end up doing.
4. I was satisfied and grateful. Tired as well.

Discomfort and Degradation

1. Yes, although I've always respected the tap.
2. Yes, during facefucking as consent was obtained prior and discomfort was understood to be inevitable.
3. Yes, I believe every sexual encounter leaves a mark and once it's there, it can never be erased.
4. I mean, I've given head to women and experienced the hands in hair and strong-ass thighs if that counts.
5. Yes. Regardless of so-called gender equality, a woman being on her knees before a man will always require a willingness to swallow her pride (among other things). But since most women choose a man that they look up to, it's only natural.

Hope that answers everything. 

Edited 17 hours ago by Blacking Your GF

[Spermonator]

Nice topic! I will try to answer as honest as possible to all of your questions. Hopefully you will like what you will read. 

Her Experience

Do you think about whether she's actually enjoying it, or does it not cross your mind in the moment?

Of course, I think about that.  I want her to enjoy it cause otherwise I won't be having an erection at all. It's all pointless to me if this doesn't turns her on.

Have you ever asked a woman honestly what it feels like from her side? Would you want to know?

I have asked a woman once but she didn't gave me a very detailed answer. Which was disappointing. I would want to know very much actually.

Can you tell the difference between a performed moan and a real one? Does it matter?

I can't tell the difference honestly. I wish all moans that she makes were real.

Have you ever been with a woman who clearly didn't want to be doing it but did it anyway? Did that register? Did it change anything?

Maybe like once or twice but it wasn't a big deal since her lack of enthusiasm ruined everything.

Do you think most women genuinely enjoy giving head, or do you suspect they're performing more than they let on?

I don't know really. Maybe some do but the majority is probably just performing just so they can be on a good terms with their partner.

Power

What goes through your head when you're standing over a woman on her knees about to give you head?

That I'm about to dominate her. That she is very submissive position, ready to please me 

Do you feel powerful? Is the power part of the pleasure?

Yes, I feel very powerful in that moment. Power is essential part of the pleasure. I feel like I'm her god, king, lord and she is there to serve me, please me with her soft mouth.

Have you ever put your hands on her head? What were you thinking about when you did?

I have. That I'm encouraging her to keep going and not stop. It's gesture that shows her that I want more.

Has a woman ever told you to stop or slow down during one? How did you react?

Maybe several times. Sometimes I have stopped but there is also rare cases when I delay my stop cause of arousal.

Do you think about the vulnerability of her position: on her knees, mouth full, unable to speak?

Yes, her vulnerable position with her mouth full and on her knees is turning me on. It's like she is depended on my mercy and I decide when she can breath. If she really didn't wanted this, she wouldn't have gotten on her knees for me with her mouth open for me to use.

Transactional

Have you ever felt like a blowjob was something you were owed?

 Absolutely not! I can totally be with her even without a blowjobs.

Have you ever been more generous, giving gifts, attention, or even commitment, after a woman gave you particularly good head?

I have only given cuddles after a good head. Except once when I gave 20 bucks to for pleasuring me with her mouth.

Do you think there's a connection between how good the head was and how you treat a woman afterward?

Yeah, if she gives good head will get more attention and affection from me.

Would you break up with a woman who refused to give blowjobs? Would it be a dealbreaker?

Not at all. I won't be distancing myself from her just because she doesn't want to do it.

Finishing

Do you prefer to finish in her mouth? Why?

It usually she takes it in her mouth. I also love doing it there because it's kind of slutty and humiliating for her.

Does swallowing matter to you? What do you think it means to her?

Maybe she is so horny that she wants it badly. That she is enjoying the whole experience and wants to express that with the act of swallowing.

Have you ever thought about what it actually tastes and feels like for her to swallow?

Yes, I have. Many times in fact.  I have even asked several women what it's like for them to do it.

Has a woman ever spit it out? How did you feel about it?

This is has never happened to me before. I don't mind if she spits it's out.  What is important to me is that my cock was in her mouth.

Do you prefer to finish on her face or body? What's the appeal?

I like cuming on her face but also her body. Usually the woman says where she wants my cumshot.

Real vs. Performance

What made the best blowjob you've ever had the best? 

Her enthusiasm, eagerness and how long it took for her to do it.

Was it the physical sensation, or was it something else, like the way she looked at you, the things she said, how she made you feel?

A combination of all. The way she looked at me and her words. Also the feeling was pretty amazing.

Have you ever had a technically skilled blowjob that wasn't as good? What was missing?

I have. Maybe there was lack of desire on her part to make it better. Basically it was a lazy blowjob.

How much of the pleasure is physical versus psychological?

70% physical and 30% psychological.

Do you need to feel like she wants it for it to be good?

Yes, of course. Without that, I won't be getting much pleasure.

Comparison

Do you rank the women you've been with by how good they were at this? 

Not really. Well maybe a little but there is other factors that contribute to my opinion about how good a woman was when I was being with her.

Have you ever told your friends about a specific blowjob? What did you say?

I don't share much information with others about what I have done with women. When I share however I'm always detailed in what made it good.

Do you think blowjobs are more intimate than intercourse or less?

I don't know. I'm not sure really. Maybe blowjobs are more intimate cause the oral aspect of it. I mean you put something private in someone's mouth. That's pretty intimate.

Have you ever had a blowjob that made you fall for someone? Or fall out of love with someone?

Yes, I have experience with a woman that made totally fall for her. But only that.

First Time

Do you remember your first blowjob? What did it feel like?

I don't remember my first time. It was a long time ago.

Did you know what to expect?

Not really. All this was completely new to me. So I can't say knew anything.

Were you surprised by anything: the warmth, the wetness, the sight of it?

I guess I like it. Otherwise I wouldn't have wanted it more later in life.

Did you feel guilty afterward? Grateful? Both?

Probably both. I don't remember the exact experience, but the first a few times, I felt guilt for doing it and grateful that the girl did. Plus, I felt shame for getting in such activities since I wasn't a very sexual person. There was a little disgust as well for sure.

Discomfort and Degradation

Have you ever held a woman's head down longer than she wanted?

Yes, I have in moment of intense arousal that made me do it. I wanted to choke on it.

Have you ever ignored signs that she was uncomfortable?

I have done it, but again I couldn't help myself since I was way too horny to care...

Have you ever thought about it afterward and felt like you took something?

Yes, I felt guilty and apologized like million times. I was so sorry.

If you could be on your knees in front of someone with their hands on your head, would you want to know what it feels like?

Yeah, I have been wondering about that. I guess I would like to know. 

Do you think the act is inherently degrading to women?

Yes, but that what makes this act so hot. If women didn't liked it, why would they do it? I mean as long as they're not being pressured against their will one way or another, I see no problem. If it's consensual, then they want it for some reason.

[Balthier]

 Her Experience

1. Yes. Now regarding my ex-wife, she had an oral fixation, and greatly enjoyed it. The others I've experienced seemed, at least to enjoy themselves. 
2. No I have not. I'm not overly curious on this one.
3. I want to say yes. Does it matter? No. Even if it's forced on her part, that shows the amount of effort, and that's sexy. 
4. To my knowledge, I have not.
5. My ex loved it. It would be normal, even while we were just hanging out watching something at time for her to lean over, unzip me and start sucking. Sometimed to completion, sometimes just to get me arroused gor sex. My partner after that, I don't think enjoyed it near as much. Not at first, but really grew into it, and got good over many mmonths. As she got confidence with what she was doing, she seemed to like it more. 

Power

1. This feels right. This is going to be awesome!
2. Most of the time, now, yes. It was different back with my ex. That oral fixation, knowing she wanted to do it for herself as much as me, made it different some times. But usually the power dynamic is part of it.
3. Yes. Sometimes to help her, sometimes to control her, sometimes just to play with her hair. A lot of times I do what I know my partner(s) likes in this regard. 
4. No. But I would respect my partner.
 5. Yes, I do find her sexy like that.

Transactional

1. I'm thinking back, and honestly can't recall a time I thought I was owed a BJ.
2. Yes. When I had first met my ex, I had not encountered someone so skilled with her mouth and tongue as she was. I remember sitting at my computer back in the early 2000s... she came over, and I went to turn it off, she said to keep in on and keep doing what I was doing. If I recall I was playing Sim City or something. She went under my desk, I got hard as she unzipped my pants, and... fuck  did she have excellent skills. Come to find out ahe really enjoyed being under the desk, distracting like that in the extreme. This encounter changed the course of this relationship, and I was definitely more generous with gifts shortly afterwards. 
3. Probably. There is definitely a respect for the act, and the skill level.
4. No, I'm not that superficial, there's a lot more to relationships. That said, I've never had a relationship in my adult life where she refused.

Finishing

1. Yes. It feels good, I like being inside her somehow.
2. A bit yes. Ex loved to suck me dry and happily swallowed it all. After that, partners would spit. At first. As relationships progressed, they started swallowing. I think it has to do with level of connection. For me and her?
3. No... but, there was this one time. My ex had bought a toy she wanted to try on me. She did, I came hard, and the way she had me pointed, laying on my back, the force of my... expulsion, I ended up giving myself a facial. An embarrassing story, got it in my eye and a little in my mouth. Hilarious looking back on it now.
4. Yes, I thought it was understandable. I still appreciated her, but it wasn't as much of a feeling of connection afterwards. 
5. Either face or tits, if not in her mouth. Face seems like an act of submission on her part, tits, feels more like marking territory. 

Real vs. Performance

1. Telling she was turned on by it, and very into it, most importantly. That combined with skill, eye contact at the right moment, her lips and hands working together. Her lips on the most sensitive part, just past my head, her tongue lickong my head, a hand working the bottom of my shaft, and her other fingers gently stroking the back of my balls. Perfectly executed. 
2. Physical sensation combined with the eagerness, and the look in her eyes, like she wants to do this, or she submits to the will.
3. I had someone into it that didn't really know what she was doing (mostly lesbian), not the other way around. I felt obligated to cum for her efforts despite the lack of technique. It took me a while, but finally got there.
4. Hmmm. I want to say physical at first, but it's probably closer to 50/50.
5. It is absolutely better that way for me.

Comparison

1. Internally, it is known.
2. Not male friends, no. There was however a discussion with some female co-workers...
3. Can be close, though I don't think anything is quite as intimate as vaginal penetration followed by a big creampie. 
4. Yes, see above story. It definitely made me change course with the girl I eventually married, and was happy for a long time. 

First Time

1. Amazing, I was like 20 maybe? I was so into it, I don't think I lasted long her mouth.
2. No, not really. 
3. The sight really turned me on, the feeling, was some kind of... power inbthe situation perhaps?
4. Grateful 

Discomfort and Degradation

1. Nope.
2. Nah, I want her to enjoy it.
3. Not the way I've had it.
4. Never had the urge to experience that. I do wonder what ahe feels like at times. I do like ro understand how a partner feels to make aex better for them too.
5. There is a power balance to it, and perhaps a bit. In my eager ex's case, no, not really, if it was my boss on her knees, most definitely.