Conditional Power

[IsabellaRose]

Granted, but it only works on my infected hands!

 

Wish: Gidgy to always be by my side to help me fight crime as "bloody claw lady" or whatever they'll call me.

[Gidgy]

Granted! Cause that was her plan all along!  Muhahahahahahahaaaaahhahaaaa-- *coughs* ... Gotta work on thats...

 

Wish: A fancy super motorocycle and a longer tongue. One for her and her hero partner to ride on, and the other just for her hero partner to ride on.

[IsabellaRose]

Well it's hard to grant that and add a negative twist, but...

Granted, but then your hero partner never wants to get off your tongue, so you never get to ride your motorcycle.

 

Wish: the willpower to take a break from riding that tongue

[KillerQueen22]

Granted but you get addicted to sucking on her toes

Wish: the power to grant my own wishes WITHOUT a negative side effect

[Pixel]

Granted but that's not how the game works and it still backfires

The power to shoot non lethal lasers from your eyes

[KillerQueen22]

Its lethal to non human entities

Wish: never needing to eat or sleep so i can be super productive

[Pixel]

You never need it but you still get the negatives, loss of weight, fatigue, eye bags, etc.

The ability to read the thoughts of animals

[Gidgy]

Granted! But you soon realize they all hope you die soon so they can take your stuff and eat your face. 
 

wish: every time I rhyme I can make a magic spell

[KillerQueen22]

Granted but you forget what rhyming is as so as the idea for a wish pops in your head 

Wish: to become a god

[IsabellaRose]

granted, but you have no believers, and everyone knows a god without believers has no power.

 

Wish: a horde of cultist-like followers who will do whatever I command.

[KillerQueen22]

Granted but they only do it when they're horny and all of the are asexual cult-like followers with not a single sexual desire in their entire existence.

Wish: invisibilty

[IsabellaRose]

granted, but only when no one is looking at you.

 

Wish: invulnerability

[Gidgy]

Granted! You’re invulnerable to everything, including the bacteria that’s needed to digest food leading to the most successful weight loss known, because you starve to death. Thankfully your invulnerability means you leave a perfect corpse which is later motorized and put to work as a demining robot. 
 

wish: genius with robotics

Edited October 9, 2023 by Gidgy

[Pixel]

Granted but they rise up and you are not spared.

The ability to make plastic waste degrade instantly

[Gidgy]

Granted! The environment is cleaning up at an alarming rate and that’s when it was discovered that you were also made of plastic. They still celebrate your contributions though. Go you!!

 

wish: orgasms at will

[KillerQueen22]

Granted! But not your will, your geriatric Grandma with dementia will

Wish: able to master any weapon at a touch

[Minorikawa]

Granted, but upon touching it that weapon and all of its model crumble into dust. Thinking maybe this can bring about world peace, well, it doesn't. People just fight with their fists instead.

Wish: To bring about world peace I guess?

[IsabellaRose]

Granted, but your wish is misunderstood and you end up with a big bowl of whirled peas.

 

Wish: understand all forms of communication.

 

[Minorikawa]

(How'd you know I hate peas?!)

Granted, but this includes animals, insects, and even the bits of data passing through cables and wires. As a result, it seems like nothing can shut up and drives you crazy and leaves you sleepless, forcing you to go live alone in a bunker the rest of your life.

Wish: To get full time pay for only three days of work a week.

[IsabellaRose]

Granted, but it's all three days are in a row and they're each 24 hour long work days, meaning not only are you exhausted but you're getting a full 40 hours of pay for 72 hours of work!

 

Wish: To be happy.

[KelticRoze]

Granted but you spend the rest of your life working in customer service.

 

Wish: To have a non-traumatic Christmas.

[IsabellaRose]

Granted, but it's because you spend the rest of your life on a desert island where there are no people.

(working in customer service and happiness cannot coexist)

 

Wish: to never answer another phone call again

[Gidgy]

Granted but your smart phone is replaced with a fax machine and the robofaxes never stop.

 

Wish: to be snuggled up with someone who tastes good and smells nice.

[Cute_Bro]

Granted, but that person will also incessantly sniff and taste you too, so better get comfy in there!

Wish: To be pampered

[KillerQueen22]

Granted BUT you only get one minute of pampering a year.

Wish: the ability to make whatever i want with a thought whenever i want