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I mentioned in a status update that I've been a fan of Pokémon since I was 4. As such, I have been a fan for 20 years of its currently 21-year existance in the US. People say it's just a cartoon for little kids. You know what else is? My Little Pony. And look where that franchise is today. Tom And Jerry, Scooby Doo, and SpongeBob SquarePants are "just" cartoons. That doesn't mean they aren't popular. Pokémon has had a massive impact on my life. It taught me to read. My war veteran grandfather and I played together, and even traded Pokémon! I cried at Bye Bye Butterfree, and I still do. I cried for a half hour straight after Pokémon Ranger And The Temple Of The Sea. When my cousin moved back from Michigan, the first thing we talked about was Pokémon. When my dad caught me smuggling something, it wasn't drugs. It was a copy of Pokémon Silver from his house. So, obviously, I wasn't about to miss the 20th anniversary movie.
Only 2 theatres in my hometown of Sarasota, Florida, were showing it. Hollywood 20 and AMC. I chose the AMC, as a ticket was cheaper there. 2 of my 3 younger brothers accompanied me. One 17, the other 7. There was not at all any question that we would enjoy it. The 17-year-old ordered a large slushie, and the 7-year-old had a kid's meal. I ordered a cheeseburger slider combo meal. That, unfortunately, was a bad decision. It had to be cooked, and I missed the first 2 minutes. The 17-year-old assured me that all I missed was essentially Nidorino vs. Gengar, a la the Red and Blue intro. What I did see was nothing short of phenomenal, and those 2 minutes are no longer too big of a deal. About 10 minutes in, the opening credits start, accompanied by a heart-pounding rendition of the original Pokémon theme, which I lip-synced as fervently as if I was singing it at a rock concert.
I had assumed that the movie would be a retelling of the Indigo League arc of the Pokémon anime. It was, but only partially. You all know the story by now. A 10-year-old begins a journey through the Kanto region with a Pikachu. But SO much more happens! Brock and Misty are nowhere to be seen until the end credits. But Ash has 2 friends from Sinnoh who follow him. One of them happens to be the daughter of Cynthia, the Sinnoh League champion. All 3 have aspirations. Ash, of course, wants to be a Pokémon master. The girl wants her mother's acceptance. And the boy wants to become a Pokémon professor. The girl has a Piplup, and the boy has a Lucario.
So, the 3 go on a journey, as would be expected. But Ash is in possession of a Rainbow Wing. Basically, a feather from Ho-Oh. In the first episode, Ash saw Ho-Oh. The movie is basically about him chasing Ho-Oh, as well as friends and experience. He meets an abandoned Charmander, soon seen to belong to an absolute dick who kicks it when it tries to hug him. This is based on an episode, and becomes a big plot point. Ash wants to show him there are no worthless Pokémon. Along the way, Ash is followed by Marshadow, who eventually becomes the main antagonist. Ash breaks free from Marshadow's corruption, leaving Marshadow to look elsewhere for a host. Unfortunately, in the climax, Marshadow gets ahold of the Rainbow Wing, and gains massive power from it. I won't spoil the climax beyond that. It has to be seen to be believed. I spent the last half of the movie not just crying, but sobbing. Pretty much from their re-creation of Bye Bye Butterfree to the end. My 7-year-old brother repeatedly told me "it's okay."
Do I recommend this movie? Fuck. Yes. Do you love Pokémon? You'll be on the edge of your seat throughout the thrilling, theatre-shaking battles. Do you hate Pokémon? Then watch it, to see what you're missing. It's not just a cartoon. It's a heart-wrenching masterpiece that it should be criminal to miss.
To start; I’d like to make it clear that I have no personal, or professional relationship with the developers. I have not received money, or any rewards (Digital, Material, Sexual or otherwise) to give this review. However I do have a personal bias for Frontier Developments, as I have stated in my teaser. Being a massive fan of Frontier: Elite II, I have been waiting for at least a decade for a new game in the series and here it finally is. Yes; I realise this isn’t a Game Reviews site, and it’s just a section within a Hentai community of all places but what can I say, EcchiDreams is pretty diverse, but not at the expense of ethical practices.
Minimum System Requirements are as follows:
Windows 7 Quad Core CPU (4 x 2Ghz) 4 GB System RAM (more is always better) DX 10 hardware GPU with 1GB video ram Nvidia GTX 260 ATI 4870HD Continuous Internet Connection (Internet = Always On) With four hundred billion stars, some people will say “But even if I play online, and even if everyone on Earth played and didn’t stick to one system it’d feel empty” but I’d say “Elite Dangerous makes you appreciate the unfathomable vastness of space, where you can explore and may never see human’s ever again, if you so wished and I think to be able to explore gallivant around the Galaxy is a very generous trade off… In my case I’m probably getting a very sweet deal”. There is a sense of pride and wonder when you are exploring a system that potentially no one has ever been in before, and perhaps no one will ever go to. Elite: Dangerous is set in 3301 (34th Century).
Graphically speaking Elite: Dangerous is inspiring, each point of light is an actual star within the universe, unlike the X-Series in which it seems like a fixed image wrapped around your view. Nebulae and even the galactic core gets bigger the closer you travel to them too, which really adds to the all immersion of the game.
As for resolutions, even though there aren’t monitors capable of displaying it the game can be played on 4k, 8k and even 16k resolutions. I personally use 2715x1527 (DSR by Nvidia) on a 1920x1080 screen, ultra settings (of course) and sometimes I get lost in the stunning visuals from time to time. Stars look almost fluid like, and speaking of which - every planet follows a real time orbit which means if you are in orbit of a planet and wait long enough you’ll see Day and Night cycles, and this is true with stations, some of which the planet eclipse’s the systems star which causes night to fall on them. The level of detail and design is absolutely breathtaking when you stop to look at it. I am concerned by the lack of lighting on the dark side of a planet, from cities that you’d expect to see on Earth. But from what I read this morning this will be added into the next update.
Music and sounds is by far where Elite: Dangerous knocks most games I’ve played out of the ballpark. The satisfying “Pop” when a ship explodes, the sounds of the engines (which is different in every ship I have tried so far) to the weapons systems - absolutely amazing. I have included a video of actual game play (my game play) which shows what I am talking about. Although the one thing I do have complaints about here is the quality of VoIP, which leaves a lot to be desired.
Elite: Dangerous features a fully dynamic economy and galaxy. Meaning what we (as players) do, does affect the system or galaxy (if the “thing” is big enough to) in a number of ways. As of yet I’m not sure if this is a good thing or not, as it’s a computer game I suspect an exploit in something is going to unfairly balance something and cause the carefully stacked deck of cards to come crashing down. But this as far as I am aware hasn’t happened yet, so fingers crossed?
Something a lot of people have complained about is the Docking Mechanics, now call me a fanboy but I say “Learn how to fucking dock then” and word of advice; don’t completely trust the Auto Docking Computer either - the one time I took my eyes off of it, was the one time it did something really fucked up and got stuck inside the station’s textures… How the hell it managed that - I have no idea (I wasn’t looking), certainly don’t take your eyes off it when using it with a Lakon Type 6, because that bitch will skid across the docking pad like butter in a frying pan. The Classical music (Blue Danube) is a nice touch and feel like a economically privileged bastard when I’m using it, perhaps the only time I will feel that way.
Controls took a little while to get used to, but once I got used to them they’re almost second nature, although I did change the mouse behaviour and tweaked the A and D keys for rolling to more fit my style of playing, the keys are fully customisable and whilst I haven’t had chance to try it out yet- the 360 controller does work quite well with it although a specialised Joystick and Throttle is supposedly the best way to (and the way in which your character) operate(s) the ship, but I can’t justify paying for one of those when my current set up works just nicely. Unfortunately one complain I have here with the GUI is when Hardpoints are deployed, let’s say I have a beam laser on my primary and missiles on my secondary. Primary is triggered by the left button and secondary is triggered by the right button. So why in Gaben’s name is Primary put on the right of the screen and secondary put on the left? That doesn’t seem very intuitive at all.
Then we get to Gameplay Mechanics… Currently you start off in a small Sidewinder (or Eagle if you got the Beta, like I did - I still don’t condone Pre-Ordering especially after Egosoft’s debacle) and 1,000 credits. You’re in a space station (LHS 3447 for most people, for some reason I stated at LHS 1914) and what you do from there is your business. Start a trading job, do missions, be a courier, pirate, bounty hunter, explorer, asteroid miner, whatever! The World(STRIKE) Galaxy is your oyster. It’s “Level” progression is split into three camps “Combat” “Trade” and “Exploration” of which you can “Progress” the ranks independently. There are also a number of “Super Power” groups such as the Federation, the Empire and the Alliance and countless of smaller groups, organisations, corporations and so on, each with their own missions and such.
The only loading screen I see for the whole game is the one when you go into a game, other than that there aren’t any visible loading screens. We are in the 21st 34th Century - It’s about damn time.
There is currently a serious problem that needs addressing with the Private Group feature in that if the group is split on different servers you can absolutely forget about trying to talk with them, massage them and even see/meet up with them in game. Both/All sides must restart the game just to have a chance of connecting to the same server. This is majorly off putting and at times frustrating, especially when the game decides to move you to a different instance to your friend(s) in mid-game.
What I personally would like to see is spatial anomalies and “Weirdness” that could be backed by science, like newly formed systems, T Tauri type stars in which cloud matter surrounds them, alien races or particle fountains! I understand we’re going for realism here but then… When I checked HDE 226868 it didn’t even have a black hole in the system, let alone a star having it’s mass being “consumed” by one. As for HR 7012 I see no planetary collision, in a game that prides itself on realism with stuff we (As humans) know, this was majorly disappointing and sorely underwhelming, at this point I’m hazarding a guess that Fomalhaut doesn’t have the dust cloud, but I haven’t been there, yet. There are more bones to pick with Blackholes in the game such as time dilation and/or spaghettification, but seeing as I haven’t seen one since Beta/Gamma I have no idea if they’ve improved or not (I haven’t been to HDE 226868 since Gamma either). 'Don’t fuck me around on this, Elite' I'd protest. Other than actually going to them and seeing them myself - I know my stars and shit but basically what I am saying here is this mechanic (Exploring) could do with some work.
Some have asked “Why aren’t there Quasars?” Because there isn’t actually any in our Galaxy (that we know of), so this is accurate. Although fun fact; some scientists believe that we might have one that "comes back to life" when Andromeda and the Milkyway merge in several billion years time.
You can make a fair bit of money off Exploring, but I really didn’t bother until I got an Advanced Scanner. You can sell the exploration data to any (as far as I know) starport for some cash, as long as the explored system is 20LY or more away- fair enough… However I found there was little to no point in it unless you got yourself an Advanced Discovery Scanner, not that I am complaining about this. I think it’s great that there are extra tiers to the Discovery Scanner. Trust me you’ll want one, if your aim is to explore.
Combat is amazing, for me I find that the blue bar on the speedometer is the “Sweet Spot” that allows me to turn faster, and I highly recommend investing in a Kill Warrant Scanner if you’re a bounty hunter, you will not be disappointed. Unfortunately… As you can see in the video this is far from perfect. For example if a Federal Security Service ship nicks you (hits you accidently in combat) there’s no apologies, they’re not wanted, nor do they face repercussions. You hit anything but a target that isn’t “WANTED” and you’re in for it. 200cr fine, which seems reasonable-ish, but the problem is every fucking “Cop” will be after your blood. Yes I suspect my aim might not be good, but come on - when a ship comes up from under you quickly OBVIOUSLY seeing you’re firing then they should expect to get hit… Seems a bit “Entrapment(y)” and "Overkill" to me.
Protip: Resource Extraction Sites are the best place to “Farm” easy kills. If you’re into Piracy you might want to consider this too. I know I am. I highly recommend doing the “Combat Training Demo” before doing any combat. It should also be noted that Resource Extraction Sites are significantly more demanding on the GPU for obvious reasons.
Trade back in Beta used to be pretty awesome, especially with Slopey’s Trade Calculator tool which Frontier Developments seem to not like the use of (as it scraped market data from their servers) as a result we have to use manually updated data. This is fine with me as far as I am concerned - to a degree. You see in Elite: Dangerous there is a number of systems that I’m going to call “Open” about their trade information and such (Systems you don’t have to spend in game Credits in order to obtain the information), these systems should be allowed to be scraped for these calculators… At the very least I’d expect useful information when I buy trade data, as it currently stands it’s useless. Trade as far as I am concerned right now is pretty broken, although I did make 8/9 million off of buying Palladium at Worlidge Terminal at LHS 3447 then selling it at Cleve Hub in Eravate. Its several trips mind, and the way back to Worlidge is pretty time consuming but worth it if you have a Cobra MkIII, with lots of cargo space or a Lakon Type 6, or bigger ship with lots of cargo space. (Free tip there)
There was some controversy a month before release when Frontier Developments announced that there wasn’t going to be an offline mode, this is probably due to the fact that the game is dynamic, and action affect the Galaxy (or portions of) now the gameplay itself is endless server costs and maintenance isn’t and there is a bit of uncertainty as to what will happen. What compacts this problem is the features that will be implemented over time in Expansion Packs which is even more concerning - because I’m sensing “£40 for Expansion Pack”. Some of these features I was under the impression would be included, but eh it is what it is. What it does have going for it is that the Developers are also players of the game, and it’s something they very clearly have a lot of pride in as it can be seen in the next video, it’d definitely seem that there is much for them to do as there is for us (the players to do) and to see this kind of enthusiasm from a dev team on a game… Is heart warming.
Features we can expect to be included in these “Expansion Packs” are apparently:
Landing / driving / prospecting on airless rocky planets, moons & asteroids Walking around interiors and combative boarding of other ships Combat and other interactions with other players and AIs in the internal areas of star ports Accessing richly detailed planetary surfaces (and even cities) Availability of giant ‘executive control’ ships to players In Conclusion
Now I’m already sensing that there is going to be at least one comment saying “Star Citizen is better!” And quite frankly I don’t care, lets set something clear. We haven’t had a decent space simulator to this magnitude and quality in a very long time, certainly not with this generation of computers. But really they have a lot of differences and it’s like comparing Golden Apples, to Golden Oranges; they’re both Golden and Fruit, as well as not very edible (I’d imagine) but that’s it - they’re different. That said if the rumours of StarCitzen’s Pay2Win are overblown or false I might pick up that game too, and review it… Unfortunately; despite its flaws, Elite: Dangerous has me, well and truly hooked. Elite: Dangerous feels like and is pretty much a Work in Progress, but it’s a damn fine Work in Progress and I look forward to the new features and future updates.
I do fear for some aspects of this game’s future, I was a late backer due to money constraints (I couldn’t afford 2x Alpha copies, otherwise I’d of gotten ten) and there is a lot of work that needs to be done in some areas. However this game is fucking awesome, graphically, sounds, immersion, music, it’s hit after hit and in these areas it does feel very well polished. I do like the fact that this game is dynamic, none of those scripted cheap ass endings we saw in Mass Effect 3 and I think I will be playing it for years to come.
The problems with this game are small or are outweighed by positives. I feel most of the things wrong with this game can be fixed, and probably will be fixed at some point. It certainly did better on launch than X-Refail even if comparing those to games is like comparing a Golden Apple to a Kick in the Bollocks.
Ability to play Solo or Private Group instead of jumping into public. Music and Sounds. Graphics, obviously. Somewhat future proofed with 4k, 8k and 16k graphics and textures. Truly Dynamic Economy. A truly dynamic galaxy, shaped by the Players actions. Immersive. VR/Oculus Compatible. Exceptional attention to detail. 400-billion fucking star systems! Extremely promising future. Absolutely free-ranged. Dedicated and passionate staff behind it. Cons:
Bugs with the Private Groups is infuriating. Systems that we know of, aren’t accurately portrayed. VoIP is dodgy, at best. VR/Oculus Compatible (I don’t have one ~envy~) Authorities over-react to NPC’s Pilot error. Trade Data is useless. It’s online only (this is a deal breaker for some). Well worth your money? If you like this genre of games then hell yes it is.
Please note that this article was originally posted up on January 23rd 2015; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.
[I'm not a professional reviewer just decided to make a post in here. Might make it a regular occurrence... I do have plenty of Hentai, who knows? I don't expect everyone to agree with my views or opinions, and if yours differs please feel free to reply/leave a comment. But lets keep this rational.]
I watched this the only way I could and would ever watch a Hentai; English Subbed (Because the only other language I remotely know is Russian even then... It's pretty much "Hello" and "Can I use the toilet?") and Japanese Dubbed (Because English Dubbing sends to sound shallow, flat, uninspiring and worst of all- Juvenile. In my opinion).
Kuro Ai: Hitoyozumakan Inkou Rannyuuroku A.K.A Dark Love is a very strange Hentai indeed; it starts off with a tentacle rape/tentacle fucking that should give the viewer some indication of what's to come, yet in Episode 1 this is the last time we see a good ol' fashioned Tentacle Scene. I watch this the only way I could and would ever watch a Hentai; English Subbed (Because the only other language I remotely know is Russian even then... It's pretty much "Hello" and "Can I use the toilet?") and Japanese Dubbed (Because English Dubbing sends to sound shallow, flat, uninspiring and worst of all- Juvenile. In my opinion).
The Sex Scenes are on Crack and the Characters are quite possibly on Cocaine and Speed. Welcome to Dark Love.
When I first saw this in 2010; it was immediately hailed as my favourite Hentai of all time, so it's interesting now in 2013 (nearly 2014) that I'd review it again nearly four months on and almost 9 years after episode one was released. Since 2005 the world of Hentai has changed, perhaps forever. So a lot has happened since this was released and I definitely don't think it'd be released today. To say it's "Absolutely Not For Children" would be perhaps the biggest understatement ever; some adults can't even cope with the stuff that goes on in this Hentai. But I'm a little older now, and I believe I can analyse it at least somewhat objectively with hardly any bias. Fingers crossed.
The plot according to ANN states "Tetsuya's investigation into a luxurious hotel turns over a nest of yakuza and a bizarre orgy cult. On rich silk sheets and velvet chairs, the rich and powerful participate in sex acts so depraved that just witnessing them is likely to turn a man into a monster. But the true purpose of this cult is a pact with evil energies that can literally turn Tetsuya into an inhuman demon." Well I'm glad someone has an idea what's going on; I've watched this Hentai about six times already and each time I learn more, I pick more up from it in terms of trying to follow the plot. Perhaps its because I have to read it all (Which no doubt things probably got lost in translation in) but that's not the only thing, as I said earlier the characters seem to be on some kind of speed enhancing narcotic, blink and you probably missed a key part of the story, and if that wasn't bad enough it seems the sex scenes are placed in just the correct format to completely distract you from the Story Line.
Did anyone else find it a little bit strange that Tetsuya Gojou's work can be helped by standing outside of a school for (what I assume is for) girls? Come on... I'm the first to say there are ligitmate reasons why grown men might be around a school (Teacher, Parent, etc) but even in context that's strange.
Now usually this isn't such a bad thing, distraction with some kinky pleasure, and on that regard it works. But the problem is, that's not the only thing that's distracting. The Sex Scenes contain a lot of flashing, and quite frankly high quality GIF like pictures on a 1ms transitional or something (Hence the Crack comment.) Now whilst I see what the producers were trying to do with this, I feel that it was just simply too fast with lacking frames, it was like watching a computer game lag. Then there's the fucking dialogue during the sex scenes, I find it hard to take any of them seriously anymore, even taken out of context it's annoyingly, humorously distracting at best and not in the good way.
On the topic of distractions during the sex if the above wasn't enough, something rather strange happened in the first sex scene. Without giving too many spoilers away (if you haven't watched it already) Miyabi came into the bedroom of Tetsuya Gojou, a phone tucked half in her thigh high as she crawled her way up Tetsuya Gojou's bed. The Phone was connected to a phone call with Ayaka Utsumi (From what I can tell; she's Tetsuya Gojou's girlfriend.) Where she could hear her lover climaxing because Miyabi was giving him a weird blowjob/titjob. Obvious Ayaka Utsumi heard this and was deeply upset that her beloved would cheat on her. So far, so good. Then the music changed, and things started getting weird. They were being watched by Hazuki Sogawa who at this point is masturbating furiously, I think pretending that that Tetsuya Gojou was doing this to her, but then strangely so was his now Ex-Girlfriend (She dumped him apparently). The sex scene jumped back and forward from this rape scene to these two women jiffing themselves off. That was confusing and I'm not entirely certain that upon hearing that news and reacting like that the first thing anyone would do is furiously masturbate over the cheating partner fucking them like this. So yeah that was a little confusing to be honest.
Apparently duc, his well-being doesn't seem to be his biggest priority at the moment.
The more I tried analysing this Hentai the more I got quite cynical about it and I didn't really know what it was. As I said previously the more times I watched it the more it appeared to change my perspective into what exactly I just watched. I love that they crammed so many fetishes into one bag but the scene were we had wiggly worms being inserted up the anus of Hazuki Sogawa... Personally not thing, and I personally don't know who on Earth would find that sexually pleasing. (But apparently it's a real thing, so I withhold my judgement on it, each to their own.)
There is a plot to this porn, but the problem with it is it's both brilliant and hard to follow mainly because of the distractions. If the plot was easier to follow, and less distractions through the whole 'Adult Cartoon' then perhaps it would have made it perfect. I also get we're trying to train 'dirty sluts' here, but I don't quite understand why a "Slut" should have to look up at the man they're blowing off. Really; from my perspective I find it awkward (That could just be me though) if anyone did it. Slut or not. But throughout the series one's not sure if they're berating or complimenting "Sluts" further adding to the confusion.
I feel Dark Love somewhat shares what I personally believe in. Although they probably push the boundaries for me a little bit further than that. It's not often in a Hentai you see a Pregnant Woman simultaneously giving a bunch of men some sexual service, but it was nice to see. Everything about it was tolerable, and even enjoyable (Save the faults listed above) then at the end she was pissed on by all of them. Well there's another boner killer right there.
I have to keep in mind that some people out there do love having a Golden Shower (Again not my thing, I do RP it though.) AND it's with (As far as we're aware) consenting adults. (Okay it's a Hentai, it's fictional. That's not what I meant.)
Episode two; starts off with Rikka Koujin blowing off Tetsuya, somewhat explaining a mission involving the Magic Potion, which was somewhat touched on in the first Episode. We can deduce that this potion fuels some kind of change to tentacle monster from Human in this Episode. I think these are filled with what ever woman he's "Courrupted"'s collection of male jizz. (I've heard that before...) This potion keeps people youthful, slutty and irresistible to- I've watched this six times and honestly I have no fucking idea what's going on. It explains a few things leaves a lot open for interpretation, moving on...
After the titles we're pretty much introduced to Honoka Houjou's sister, Kaori Mizuno, she's a married woman. Except we don't know that bit yet, she's in debt possibly because her business isn't doing so well and she has to pay the money back to what I would assume is either Yukuza or some kind of Non-Tentacle-Monster-Owning-Loan-Shark, there's a shocker. Honoka Houjou brings Hazuki Sogawa and Tetsuya Gojou in with her, at this point Honoka and Kaori are revealed to be sisters and Hazuki and Tetsuya are "Customers" After some whoopsie-daisy I dropped the drink and broke something we enter the closure of the scene after a quick comedy sibling-teasing bit. We seem to jump forward in time, and we come back to the Cafe/Shop thing only to find that now she has to pay by noon not days she was promised before. Tetsuya conveniently makes a re-appearance after the phone call, from what we can assume this is out of the blue. He apparently wants to help her, there's a short cut and he's sitting down, ordering a warm drink. Apparently big breasts means Titty Milk, whilst I won't pick on a hentai for this kind of logic, I will say that her not questioning this did ring as little odd, but perhaps she's desperate.
Kaori returns with the milk in a sippy cup, I dread to think how much that'll set him back. When she brings it over to him we have another typical "Whoopsie-daisy" moment in which her breast milk spills all over his groin.
That's some fascinating stuff. I know some people will say this Hentai is derogatory to women. I'd be happy with that statement, if on the same logic, when applying a faulty premise on a fictional cartoon that it's also derogatory to men too. I don't think I've heard Sperm and Semen reduced to dirty "Cock Juice" and said more times in any Hentai in my life. Seriously it could be turned into a drinking game. If you're one of those people (and whatever -- its your life) that finds and complains about these types of problems then perhaps Dark Love isn't for you. In fact most Hentai probably isn't either.
It seems his luck didn't get the shit end of the stick as well, as within seconds she agreed to clean him all up with her mouth. How nice... Then he got a boner and you know where that's going next. Infact the first time I saw this episode I distinctly remember when I first heard about the Coffee shop saying "HURR! You know where that's going!" Well unsurprisingly it went there, and then some.
After the blowjob we're left with Tetsuya telling her how she was going to pay back her debt, assumingly it involved selling them off. We also get a nice squiggly line away from her mouth from what I assume is a pube. I know I wanted realism but really?
As I went through the plot, I felt it was rushed when she just started handing out sexual favours so willingly, but then I don't consider myself part of the society that's around me... So I have no idea if a married woman would do this so quickly, I doubt it. Then within ten minutes she sold herself and her sister off to pay her debts. Then less than ten minutes after all this started there was a free for all, fuck and cum inside party between her and her sister with a room full of men (apparently). To which they were berated and fucked and then pissed all over again. (This time they made the mentioning of drinking it all down. What ever rocks your boat?) The sex scenes were hilarious in dialogue, animation, and content. I'm also pretty sure that this DVD should contain an Epilepsy Warning, because it just wasn't fun. As fictional (IE. Not real, as in they're not real people) storylines go, it'd probably be alot better if the dialogue was cleaned up, if I could edit Subs in the video I'd probably do it just so I could stop complaining about it. But if the scenes weren't so distracting. There's also a lot of "I'm going to Climax"... I mean repeatedly. I thought this may have been Translation issues but later it was "I'm coming" which to be honest reads better.
I feel if I were wanking off to this, I'd end up like this guy...
I feel this Hentai is supposed to be a boundary pusher, and that's pretty much mission accomplished. In terms of Fetishes, I feel it hits a niche market, so I have to say that's quite daring. We have Pregnancy, Impregnation, Cheating, Bondage, Golden Showers, Inserting Wiggly-Worms up the butt, Tentacle, Dominance, A little Girl on Girl and a dash of romance (I suppose, in the second episode) and it mixes them quite well. It's pretty good at combining these to make a sex scene. Not all of them appealed to me but then it wasn't made just for me. All of this I felt was let down by the extremely low-quality rapid GIF like animations for the sex scenes, the plot was hard to follow and after watching a total of six times in my life, I still have no fucking clue what's REALLY going on. It didn't help that the distractions, distracted from it. Yet you'd be hard pressed to find the fetishes the series covered so it's a tough call. I do feel there maybe capacity for a third and last episode if anything it could tie up a few things and end the story completely but perhaps leaving it on a cliff hanger was intentional. Either way this Hentai IS inspiring particularly if you're Roleplaying something similar. It definitely could have been an actual season (say containing four to six episodes) if the time was taken to properly explain the plot and to spread it out across. That's the main problem with this Hentai; it's on crack; it's just cramming everything into two 30 minute videos and I feel that is ultimately Dark Love's downfall. Perhaps with it spread like that they wouldn't have needed to make the sex scenes look rushed (not just fast but rushed too). Considering this was my favourate hentai I don't say that lightly.
There are a lot of good elements in there, but then a lot of it is ruined by the faults and ultimately; this Unique Hentai could have done really well. But it's a shame. The dialogue is cheesy and lame although the story telling is pretty good, if you can keep up. Overall not the worst hentai I've ever watched... It's awkward, jutty and just simply... It's not the best hentai I've ever seen. But it's still my favourate for now, which proves you don't have to be perfect to be liked.
I don't mean to sound big headed and righteous, hell I don't think I could do better personally. It's worth watching if you're into a lot of things it does and if you Roleplay and need ideas it's perhaps perfect if you're looking for that sort of thing.
Of course I probably have better and worst ones with this kind of collection:
Please note that this article was originally posted up on November 24th 2013; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.
If you don't want to read any back story - please skip to the big text saying "My Review".
[I'm not a professional reviewer just decided to make a post in here. Might make it a regular occurrence... Who knows.]
As many of you already know, I’m the Site Administrator for EcchiDreams, but in my spare time (what little of it) I play a lot of video games. I’m a PC gamer myself (Preferably with a 360 Controller. The best controller, in my opinion, in existence – Today anyway), I used to play on the Xbox 360, and I grew up playing games on the Basic Amstrad CPC464 (First ever PC, 1994), Amiga A600 (1995) and eventually a Windows PC (1996+).
One of the first space games I ever played was in 1998, (Just 8 years old) and I had to code a DOS program to be ran at the startup of my PC (because I had Windows 98, not good for running old DOS games). So basically I edited the autoexec.bat file in my C: drive (I believe) and injected my own script to run making the machine a multi-boot with MS-DOS with HighMem, and Windows 98 for my other games. It was a lot of fuss but it was what I went through to start playing Frontier Elite 2 (David Braben), and boy once I got it. I didn’t stop playing it. Then in 1999, I had to severely upgrade my computer just to run X-Beyond the Frontier (Egosoft), as even the though my machine matched the recommended requirements it still wasn’t enough, but it was so worth it when I finally got the components and was able to start playing it (And believe me I played for a long time).
(Thanks Dad! Whenever he upgraded his PC, I got the hand-me-downs. Useful because I ended up building lots of computers and start experimenting!)
I truly believe at the time that it was the most realistic thing I had ever experienced in a game! To some degree I believe to this day that it was ahead of its time and it is! It still looks somewhat good even today especially when compared to Frontier Elite 2, my only point of reference.
Frontier Elite 2: 1993 – David Braben
X-Beyond the Frontier: 1999 – Egosoft
I really felt my nine year old mind being fully immersed in what was going on, a part of the story line and Ban Dana of the Argon One was my brother and leader into the battle against the Xenon. I had to spend hours and hours of my childhood gaining the trust of the Peaceful Kingdom of Boron’s assistance in the fight, The Paranoid Forces of the Paranid, the Warrior Clans of the Split, Even the Greedy Scales of the Teladi to unite all species to work together to achieve a common goal. To stop the Xenon. (Only it hasn’t really stopped them at all.) But it’s uniting the known universe for the greater good that was the main focus point and I believe that was well achieved. Of course then there was the building of the Factories to get a constant stream of Credits for weapons. It made it challenging, worth it. I replayed that again when X-Tension came out unfortunately there was no sight of it in UK shops, I couldn’t get a copy. Even when getting it off eBay it turned out to be a copy boy was I ever pissed. Nowerdays I have it on Steam, cost me fuck all (Humble Bundle) and yet when I see how easy it is to get a copy now compared to back then (two years I spent trying to get it!)… Oh the memories.
I know at the time back then there was a massive hoo-har about it being “Unremarkable” as it had no plot. No story line. But I see and understand what Egosoft were trying to get at with this “Extension”. It was just a no-bullshit addon for X-Beyond the Frontier that added a TON of new things. I’ve never actually played it at length though… Never got round to it because in 2003 Egosoft released another game. X-Tension is slightly more improved in graphics to X-Beyond the Frontier.
X-Tension: 2000 – Egosoft
X2: The Threat 2003 - Egosoft
X2: The Threat, I pre-ordered without question. Damn it I wasn’t going to miss another game, by this point I never played X-Tension at all so I was pretty psyched to get it a day before it was actually due to be released (Thank you Amazon for Premature Ejaculations of Games.) I got an upgrade and remembered what I learnt from X-BtF (X-Beyond the Frontier), go above the recommended specs! Despite all this the game just never ran I didn’t get it to run until after I moved home, and was in school (So about May 2003). After getting a hold of updates (Which I had to download at school due to not being in a broadband area) and patches from Egosoft (which I had to download at a friend’s house because Egosoft.com was blocked at school, well until I hacked the shit out of that… But we will leave out how a secondary school student in the UK was able to access porn at school shall we?) I was able to update my machine and play it. In my naïve mind I didn’t see that this was a sign of things to come, now Egosoft are renown for releasing shit, fixing and ending spectacularly which is hardly ever disastrous. </sarcasm>
Needless to say there was a fuckton more to explore, and I had great fun. Sticking into it pretty good and spending more time on my PC than out there “Socialising” to be honest I still prefer it today honestly. The fact that I can do both now is something I’m still… Getting used to.
I spent a lot of time starting up my space empire, I found unknown sectors, (Boldy gone where no one’s gone before!) and decided to set up shop there, (Until I discovered some drained shields or ate hull) so once reloading a save I set up shop again in a good Unknown Sector and started my empire eventually having enough credits to expand until I had a space station in nearly every sector, and fleets in nearly every sector. I was quite proud of myself, honestly.
Then 2005 I decided to give Egosoft another chance, X3: The Reunion which I preordered. This time I got it a day late, by this point I had already started reading the reviews coming in for the game. I remember the negative ones still and the fans who were defending it. This is why I stear clear from that whole area and think upon what I THINK of the game not what a group says I should think. That said it installed properly and I could play it… For a little while. It was bugged to fuck.
I had to wait for a few months for Egosoft to make patches which I downloaded and tried out. Luckily; those patches were effective and I got used to a whole new interface, and I didn’t like the no cockpit thing at all at first, but I don’t know it’s grown on me. The fucking graphics though! ~low whistle~ DAMN. Then 2008 the BEST game ever to come out from Egosoft with Graphics that’d make anyone just want to pick up a spliff and relax at.
X3: The Reunion: 2005 – Egosoft
X3: Terran Conflict: 2008 – Egosoft
I don’t recall getting any problems with X3: Terran Conflict; it installed perfectly, ran perfectly and I had a pretty beefy PC that was capable of running it perfectly, and I got into it hard. Even when I moved to my Acer Aspire 8930G in 2010/2011 I was using it play this game. This was meant to so much to me that I literally included it as a major part of my EPSI Federation piece in the Andromeda RP. It was the “Framework” I used to build and shape their history and included actual game play in with the RP. Just keep that in mind, because the in a bit there is a head turner. I mean the Graphics... Wow.
I’ve spent a good few hours in Albion Prelude (Although have not really being taking part in story line) but that’s just an addon in my opinion to X3: Terran Conflict. This was all before I used Steam (Started 2012).
TRADE. FIGHT. BUILD. THINK.
They actually meaned something to me. The whole point of these X Games, all in space. Now that’s a game.
Imagine my surprise when I saw this trailer for X-Rebirth:
Please watch with sound/subtitles. At the time of writing this there were no annotations or links throughout the video.
I was so excited that it went straight to number 1 on my wish list and a friend of mine was very generous in getting it for me as a pre-order. I was (and still am despite the nasty experience with the game) very grateful to them, but this person is a private person and wishes to remain anonymous so I can’t thank them publicly but I have thanked them several times personally). There’s only two things I looked forward to this year; X-Rebirth and Doctor Who.
WOW! THEY TOPPED X3: TERRAN CONFLICT?!
No. They didn't even top Frontier Elite 2 in my opinion.
Now for my review...
I think X-Refail is an appropriate title to this review. There have been some on Meta Critic that have called it X-Stillbirth, I’d never be so offensive in publicly calling it that, but it’s fairly accurate as well as offensive, unfortunately. So well played in my opinion. Oh and yes I truly feel awful for thinking that.
Yes! X-Rebirth was an unmitigated disaster, despite Egosoft calling it a success. Yes it reached number 1 in sales on Steam, but I wonder how many of them will be calling for a refund? Oh wait…
I know I shouldn’t have expected X4 and I wasn’t but for fuck sakes… What the fuck is this?! THIS TOOK SEVEN YEARS?! Holy shit, sounds like you need The Doctor more than I do! There are so many bugs in the game that people haven’t even been able to play it yet. I have but only to a point; you see there are several large game breaking bugs in it. They’re so bad I think all of current progress is useless (I’ve been compensating by running around picking up loot and selling it oh then I cheated. I decided to start editing my save game to try and undo some of the damage that’s been done. Then I came to realisation as I came away from the story line. This game has worse problems than the fucking awful bugs and these can’t be fixed with a quick and simple patch. Something went fundamentally wrong in the creation of this game, and how no one spotted the bugs is beyond my current understanding at the moment. I blame either subjective blindness or stupidity to be perfectly honest. It doesn’t even feel complete and a lot of core features (ones that made the game so good were stripped!) It feels like a dumbed down version of an X-Game but like before X-Beyond the Frontier or something. Then logical explanations found by fans shed some light on it. The theory goes; The Game was designed for Consoles then for some reason Egosoft decided to scrap that and port it to PC. Which doesn’t make sense seeing as all their games have been PC based (then Linux/Mac I believe) not console basically. You can’t replicate that kind of complex system on a console and to be honest I’d never play a console version of an X game. PC vs XBOX vs PS bullshit aside, I PREFER to being able to upgrade parts in my PC than to buy a new console which (No offence) doesn’t even compare to my PC.
The trailer made some pretty start demands. I felt betrayed when I realised about this (Thank you Steam User: Mr $team [http://steamcommunity.com/id/cerealkilla007/images/?appid=2870] for helping me remember this). Egosoft outright lied (some say) worse than Electronic Arts and even more so blatantly.
"…your actions truly matter when every ship and every space station is a part of a fully simulated universe…" Be honest, really most of these ships are just cannon fodder and it doesn't make a blind bit of difference (Perhaps only in reputation with factions) if I start fly swatting, really. It’s even more noticeable when these ships are coming out of these ridiculous highways.
Also... "manage your empire with help from people you hire aboard gigantic space cities" What Gigantic Space Cities? Where were these? I recall some docks on a space station, but not actual cities. I wasn't expecting the Citadel from Mass Effect (Another EA reference) but geez. Frontier Elite 2 had a more functional (and variant) space dock, at least it had a BBS. This FELT like a joke.
In every X-Game since X-Tension you’ve been able to pilot more than one ship, let’s face in even Frontier Elite 2 got that dynamic right. It makes a game feel more customisable if you can pick your own ship and what parts go into it. If I want an Argon Titan (Lord knows why) all loaded with shockwave generators then fuck. Then that’s what I’m going to make and pilot! We got to customise the ship based on our abilities and what we were good and not good at it’s what made it fun and exciting.
This… FEELS like a console game. There’s no denying it. This guy sums up much of my review and quite honestly I share in his frustration.
If I ever meet this man, I’d buy him a pint.
The campaign (Story mode) is fucked to buggery to be blunt, and the lack of space stations (Nothing stopping from having small stations too was there?!) was insulting. I never completed the game, I got snagged on a Gamebreaker, that’s the bad type of bug that usually comes with a shit storm of angry computer smashin’ fun. [No didn’t allow it to get me that far. Close though </joke>] SETA has been ditched (Yay!) and replaced with some weird Freelancer feeling type shit. Ugh. It felt like a rewind back to the last decade or so; and that’s bad because a decade or so ago they were beyond their time and each time they did this over and over again, and this game has only set the bar backwards. Hell a re-release of X3: Terran Conflict with elements of this game would have been a much better implementation of all this.
Egosoft have been rather good at recovering from disastrous releases, they’re able to patch bugs quickly and show some of that fine German Efficiency at doing it. But this is different, I feel if all the bugs were fixed the game would still be extremely incomplete, from start to finish I have been very disappointed and disgusted about being lied to and offended that they see this as a success. I made this point on their Facebook, Steam and Site and I’ve ran into Fan’s that question my Fandom of the series as a hole. I’d say I was an Egosoft Fan but I’m not a part of the Fandom if that makes sense at all. I probably sound like a rambling hipster now. >_<
Bringing up what I said earlier, I incorporated their games into a creation of mine to help build it up. I don’t expect anything from it, of course; but I’d say that makes me qualified to be a fan, personally. Being a fan doesn’t mean I will take part in the silly debate going on, on Steam. It also doesn’t mean I will push my beliefs in other faces. Instead I decided to make a thread on my own site, and if people want to read it then fair play to them. Likewise if not; then whatever. No hard feelings.
This is why I hate fan groups. I don’t see myself as better than them by all means but I just don’t see the point in arguing about it. It’s all perspective. This is my perspective.
Summary: X Rebirth is just a pile of wank, except that at least leaves a nasty mess for someone to clean up this game is sadly a bit Beyond that Frontier. Egosoft admitted [http://www.incgamers.com/2013/11/egosoft-apologise-for-the-state-of-x-rebirth] that there were nasty bugs in the game and are already working hard in patching it. But as people have stated quite clearly already patches can only do so much; nothing can quite fix the mess that was released on the 15th November 2013. Egosoft in my opinion have to answer for a lot of questions from their loyal (and crazy*) fans. What went wrong? What happened? Why were we lied to? Why did we get rid of what fucking worked and expanded on in X3: Terran Conflict? Who passed off this game? The list goes on… Then I found out that there’s only a very limited amount of sectors overall. Wow… Fuck-this-game.
I suppose the DLC for X Rebirth will be 2 more sectors for £14.99, or 4 more sectors for £24.99. <- At the time of this post, it was intended as a joke.
Some people have said that this will probably be the end of Egosoft, and there’s no doubting they’ve lost a lot loyal fans trust over this, myself included. Some are fine with it, and in my opinion, that’s good for you. But I’m not fine with it. Nothing’s stopping you from putting up a positive review.
Oh and I discovered I have a twitchy finger with this game. I use the keyboard and mouse, because in other games the X-Box controller doesn’t work with it and honestly… I accept that. This game does work with the controller found out today. Apparently easier to use too. Fuck. Anyway every so often I’d just left click to make small adjustments to movement when all of a sudden, twitch, I’ve opened fire on a space station.
The storyline likes substance too. PMC and Albion whatevers are supposed to be hatin’ each other? Why aren’t they fighting? Why are they living side by side each other and shit? Why am I the one singled out and attacked by PMC? Come to think of it when a PMC dickwad starts shooting at me, none of my Albion friends come to my aid? In the previous X-Games I could at least hail a station and ask for assistance, in this game I fucking get told off and punished by Albion when I return fire on a PMC ship? But if these sides hate each other wh-? You see, that’s console logic. That’s why I play PC games. This game has poor graphics considering the standards Egosoft keep raising, even worse voice acting than ever, shittier music and no value in terms of game play. I can't write this review and remain unbaised as best I can with how cynical I am. There's nothing nice to say and the only things that there are is force feeded my cynicism. So I guess I failed here just like Egosoft failed with this piece of garbage.
And Update: Unconfirmed reports of 360 code has been screenshotted from a shaders folder installed with X Rebirth; this is significant because it shows why the chose to stick with DirectX 9. Some have said it was like they made it for the 360 found it wouldn't work and booted it out the door for the PC instead, which is really shameful behaviour in my opinion and if this is true I think we're rightfully owed an explanation. If this was the case the best moral thing Egosoft could do is stand up and admit they screwed us, answer our questions and learn from their feedback. Sales have also fallen sharply on Steam but then again there is apparently an AAA title up there at -40% off. Perhaps someone somewhere is burying this game back into a blackhole where it belongs, in my opinion. Can Egosoft fix it? Well they think they can fix the bugs at least. I still think it's a little beyond that personally. If it does get better and my opinion changes and perhaps I can put something nice in, then I'll come back to this with an addition review (This will remain here) until then lets see if David Braben's Elite IV: Dangerous can make a stunning return as well as RSI's Star Citizen (I should bloody well say so with over $27 Million funding it. Can't wait to review that. But I don't think I'll preorder anymore, and I'll hope my outstanding pre-orders pay off.
*Crazy and its meaning are meant as a perception orientated observation. >_>
Please note that this article was originally posted up on November 17th 2013; we have since redone our articles system and moved the review - which has given it a new "Published Date". Apologies for the inconvenience.